Alec wasn’t sure he could wait that long either.
Ed gave Alec directions to his flat, and when Alec finally pulled up outside Ed’s building, he turned off the ignition and turned to him. “You won’t change your mind, will you?” He hated how vulnerable he sounded. But in the spirit of living more honestly, he didn’t want to pretend to Ed either.
“No way. You’re stuck with me now.” Ed’s assurance warmed Alec as much as his smile. “Right, well… I should go. I’m going to spend my evening boring my flatmate stupid, banging on about you and how awesome you are.”
“I’m going to turn my phone back on and catch up with all the things I have to do next week.”
“You turned it off?”
“After the last time I texted you. I needed some time out from the rest of my life.”
Ed nodded in understanding. Then he undid his seat belt and leaned across the gearstick to kiss Alec. Their stubble scratched together, but Ed’s lips were soft. Alec didn’t want to let go of him, but finally they parted with a mutual sigh of reluctance.
“I guess I’ll see you around tomorrow,” Ed said. “My stuff is still in your office space, so I’ll head there until I find out where they’re sending me next.”
“I’ll see you in the morning, then.”
Ed gave him one more lingering kiss before getting out of the car and walking round to get his case from the boot.
Alec waited until Ed had let himself into his flat before driving away.
Alec’s answerphone was flashing with three new messages when he got home. “Shit,” he muttered, but there was no avoiding it.
He sat on the sofa and listened to them. The first was from Caspar, left last night. “It’s Casp. Just checking you got home okay. You’re not replying to my texts… call me?”
The second was Caspar again, from just a couple of hours ago. “For fuck’s sake, Alec, answer your damn phone. I talked with Mum and Dad. Mum’s okay about the gay thing, really. In shock, I think, but she wants to build bridges. Dad… well, it will take him a little longer, but that shouldn’t be a surprise. Anyway, Mum’s going to call you later.”
The last one was from his mother. “Darling, I’m sorry I didn’t react better when you told us yesterday, but it was such a surprise. Your father… well. It was even more of a shock for him. You know what he’s like. I’ve told him he’s going to have to get used to it, though. And for what it’s worth, I think he’s ashamed of how he treated you back then. I didn’t even know what he’d done. I’m so sorry, Alec.” Her voice broke and there was a pause before she carried on. “I know we haven’t always been terribly close over the years… but I love you, Alec. And I’m not losing you over this. Una and Philip’s youngest boy’s gay too, you know? He’s engaged to this lovely chap who works in the city. Una was telling me about them over lunch, and she’s so excited about the wedding. Philip didn’t like it at first, but he came round eventually, and your father will too. Right, I’m sorry, I’m rambling now. Call me… please, and perhaps I can come into town to meet you for lunch again soon?”
Alec listened to the message two more times, and some of the sadness and anger he’d been carrying since yesterday lifted. That was the best reaction he could have hoped for. If his mother was on his side, his father would get there in the end.
Next he turned his mobile back on. As soon as it powered up, it was buzzing with notifications for texts, missed calls, and voicemail.
First things first. Alec texted Caspar.
I’m fine. Sorry I went AWOL. Back home now, speak to you soon.
Then he worked his way through the other messages and emails. Most of them were Caspar; there was a missed call to his mobile from his mum, but she hadn’t left him a message. There were also a few work-related emails, including one inviting him to a meeting with the partners on Tuesday afternoon. Alec stared at it, excitement and nerves warring in his stomach. This was the final hurdle. His chance to start afresh and move forward without any more prevarication or deception.
Alec unpacked and showered before he called his parents’ number. His palms were sweating as he listened to the ringtone, and when it clicked, he heard his father’s voice barking his usual, “This is Giles Rowland. Who’s speaking, please?” at the other end.
His heart gave an uncomfortable lurch. “It’s Alec. I’m returning Mum’s call. Is she there?”
There was a long pause, punctuated by the panicked beat of Alec’s heart and the rasp of his father’s breath before he finally replied, “Yes, she is.”