I’m a realist, not a sadist.
The sound of harsh, rushed voices wakes me. My body aches all over when I move. Lucas is no longer next to me, and his clothes are gone from the floor.
“Fuck.” As soon as the word leaves my mouth, the door opens to reveal Lucas and Keir. “What’s wrong?” I ask them.
Keir ignores my question and walks off, but Lucas enters the room.
“It’s time to take you home.” I feel lightheaded when I attempt to stand, so I go to sit back down, but his arm catches me. “Take it slow.”
“Chanel.” We both look up to find Sailor there, offering me a small smile as she comes farther into the room. “Just wanted to check on you and let you know I found a replacement for you.” My heart sinks at her words. “But, plus side…” she offers me a kind smile, “… I also found you another job, closer to where you live, and they said you can start in a few weeks. It pays even better than me.”
“Chanel,” Lucas says my name when I don’t say anything back.
“Are you firing me?” I ask her. “What did I do wrong?” Sailor’s eyes flick to Lucas, and something passes between them before she looks back to me.
She moves closer and places a hand on my shoulder. “It’s better this way… for everyone. But I would love to stay in contact. I really value you and would like to keep our friendship if that’s okay?”
“Okay.” Honestly, I don’t know what else to say right now.
She wipes a tear from her face and leans down to cuddle me, her arms wrapping around my neck, but she doesn’t hold me for long, as she is heavily pregnant. She glances again at Lucas, and a look of pure unadulterated hate hits her features before she turns and walks out, shutting the door as she leaves.
“I was just fired.” My tone is tinged with sadness, but it’s nothing compared to the despondency I feel destroying everything inside me, eating away at my fragile heart.
I loved that job. I thought I had a chance at a semi-normal life and to improve my living conditions with that job. Now, it’s gone.
“So it seems,” is all he gives me in return.
Standing in front of me, fully dressed in his black button-up shirt and black slacks, he offers me his hand. “Let’s go slow now.”
I take his offered hand and allow him to help me up. When I’m fully standing, his other hand wraps around my waist, and he steps in closer, so our bodies are touching.
“Why did you do it?” I ask him, my head resting on his shoulder.
“I didn’t know any better,” he replies. His hand strokes my hair, and I hear him inhale deeply as he takes me in. “Now… I do.” Then he pulls back and turns toward the door. “Your family is downstairs waiting for you.”
My ribs ache with each step I take, but I keep going, following him down the stairs where Merci and Brody are waiting. They both smile.
“You look better,” I say to Merci.
“So do you.”
“I’m so sorry,” I tell her.
And I do feel sorry—for absolutely everything.
This is my fault.
If I’d not taken Malik on as a client, this may never have happened. And I may not have met Lucas because of that reason. If I hadn’t gotten close to Lucas, he might not have had the chance to give me to Malik. Even as I think it, I know it’s a lie because, let’s face it, Lucas always gets what he wants. And I was firmly on his agenda.
“A car is out front to take you home,” Lucas states.
Brody and Merci make their way outside, and I look back at Lucas. He holds out the medication from the doctor but says nothing.
“I’ll be seeing you, I guess.”
Why isn’t he saying anything? He’s the one who should be groveling, shouldn’t he?
“Hopefully not with a gun to my face,” he finally says.