Four Good

20

I remember it differently

When we’re all back on the boat together, Jay is quieter than he was before, but he doesn’t act angry or bothered.

Corbin and Jonathan bring a big spread out to the long table that’s on the deck, and it’s there that we have lunch, sheltered from the midday sun by the hard canopy overhead, but otherwise out in the fresh, open air, with a beautiful view of sand, sea, and sky all around us.

The men have apparently gotten the lunch items from an upscale grocery store in Whitman. There are an assortment of sandwiches on fresh, crusty baguettes, pasta salad, vegetables and dip, and a big bunch of grapes.

When we’ve finished our sandwiches, Jonathan excuses himself and then reappears with a plate filled with chocolate cupcakes topped with colorful sprinkles.

“Happy birthday!” the men chorus, as Jonathan sets them in front of me.

“Thank you,” I say, so touched at their thoughtfulness.

“Oh, we also got these for you.” Corbin turns and fishes something out of a bag behind him. It’s a long, narrow box tied with a ribbon. When I take it from him, I see a familiar logo.

“Truffles! Thank you so much.”

“We remembered what you said about liking chocolate,” Jonathan says, his eyes going dark, reminding me that I was on the couch with him, mostly naked, when I mentioned it. My pussy pulses at the memory, and I feel a tinge of sadness at the same time.

“They’re from all of us,” Brendan says, patting Jay on the back. “And I’m so glad Jay told us it was your birthday.”

“Thank you,” I say again, bringing myself back to the present moment. “This is such a treat. Here, everybody, have one.” I hold the plate out to the men, who each take one, then I dig into one myself, peeling back one side of the paper liner and taking a big, chocolatey bite.

Partway through his cupcake, Jay says, “Christine and I were together on another milestone birthday, her twenty-first.”

Brendan lifts his brows in interest. “Yeah?”

“There weren’t any bars in our little town, so I took her to Marietta for her first legal drink. After her second cocktail, all she wanted to do was dance. She kept dragging me out to the dance floor. I think she would’ve danced on the bar if she’d had a third drink.”

The Hayes brothers laugh at Jay’s story as I finish the bite I’m chewing.

“I remember it differently,” I say, purposely keeping my tone light. “You only danced with me once, and refused when I asked you again. When I went onto the floor to dance without you, you got jealous and insisted we leave.”

“Yeah?” Jay looks truly hurt by my recollection. I didn’t speak up to make him feel bad, but I also couldn’t sit by and listen to his lighthearted version of the night. My twenty-first birthday is not a good memory for me, and in fact, it was the last birthday I spent with him … until today.

“Not that it’s a great excuse,” he says, “but I was young and stupid. I’d do things differently now, Christine. I’d dance with you all night long.”

Everything’s gone quiet around us. No one’s laughing, smiling, or even eating their cupcakes.

“Well, I’d probably be too tired to dance all night now that I’m forty,” I say, finally, needing to fill the silence and lighten the mood. As if I hit a button, action around me begins again. The Hayes brothers continue eating and drinking, Jay looks away, out toward the horizon, and I let out a deep breath.

“Who wants another?” Jonathan asks, lifting the cupcake platter. “There are a few more in the galley if we eat all of these.”

I lift my palm in a quick gesture of refusal. “No, thank you. One is plenty for now.” In truth, I’ve lost my appetite — not that I’m particularly upset, but my mind is no longer on food.

After Jonathan finishes a second cupcake, I stand and start to clear away plates and silverware, but Corbin stops me. “Sit, we’ve got this,” he says, taking what’s in my hand.

Jay, who’d been sitting diagonally across from me, stands too, and the ocean breeze catches hold of his thin t-shirt, blowing it tight against his body, like a second skin. There’s a lot of definition there that he never had when I knew him. He obviously takes good care of himself these days. And works out.

“I guess we should head back,” Brendan says once the table is cleared. “Corbin, do you want to help me?”

Jay follows the two of them, leaving me with Jonathan. “Want to sit out on the deck for the ride back?” he asks. “It’s much warmer now.”

He leads me around the side of the boat to the front, where there’s a large open area for lounging in the sun. Using cushions he finds under the seat of a built-in bench, he sets up a cozy area for us to sit side-by-side and watch our progress back to the mainland.

I peel off my shirt to reveal the tank top underneath, and pull my hair up in a bun to get it off of my neck.