Taking the Leap (River Rain 3)

I’d fretted about this when we’d gone in and checked that night we’d arrived.

Rix’s bathroom at his house had been completely modified to his needs.

We’d put a bench in the shower at my house, and he had his old foldable walker that he’d used in the beginning when he was getting used to his legs in there so he could use it to swing in and out until we had the mods done around the shower and toilet areas.

But the en suite bathroom for this room was not accessible.

Rix had said not to worry. It had a handheld showerhead, which was helpful, and he’d been a lot of places where he had to get creative. He had specifically built up his upper body strength and worked with his therapists and mentor on these strategies so, as much as possible, he could resume the active life he’d had, no matter what unexpected challenges he might face.

Still, in the middle of the night in a strange room when you needed to go to the loo, it could be disorienting.

“You okay?” I called.

His body seemed to jolt, and he turned his head to look at me.

“Yeah, baby,” he murmured. “Go back to sleep.”

I wasn’t very hip on that body jolt.

Therefore, I asked, “You need anything?”

“No. All good.”

Did I let this go?

No, this was Rix.

I didn’t let this go.

“Then why are you awake in the early hours of the morning and sitting on the side of the bed?” I asked.

“My foot hurts.”

I got up on my elbow, not comprehending this answer.

Was he sleep sitting?

“Your foot hurts,” I said carefully.

“Yeah. My brain consciously knows they’re gone. But my brain physically hasn’t gotten with that program. It doesn’t know what to do with the fact that my feet aren’t there to give it signals, so sometimes it decides to tell me something’s up. When it happens, I try to get in the zone to talk it down.”

He was referring to phantom limb pain.

“Get in the zone?” I queried.

“Meditate. I’ve got some guided meditations I usually use, but I left my earbuds in my bag and I’m too lazy to go get ’em. So I was trying to go it alone.”

“I can get them,” I offered.

“That’d be good, honey,” he murmured. “They’re in the side pocket.”

I rolled out, went to his duffel that was sitting on a chair across the room, and dug out his buds.

I also made a mental note of this, so I could be sure these were where Rix needed them, even if he forgot.

I walked to him.

He took them from me and reached for his phone on the nightstand, saying, “Thanks, sweetheart.”

I crawled in bed at his side, sitting on my hip. “Has this happened since we’ve been together?”

Rix shook his head. “No. Happened a lot in the beginning, after they took my feet. That’s a serious mindfuck. You’re grieving something you lost that you used every day of your life and totally took for granted, and your brain’s stabbing pain up your feet that are no longer there. But it’s a lot better now.”

“And it’s hurting right now?”

“It’s hurting right now,” he confirmed.

I kissed his shoulder and said, “I’ll let you get on with it.”

“Mouth,” he ordered.

I pushed in and kissed his mouth.

Then he put his earbuds in, and I crawled to my side of the bed and got settled.

I didn’t sleep until I heard him put his stuff back on the nightstand, and he curled into me.

“It gone?” I whispered.

“Mm,” he hummed.

I didn’t know if that was an affirmative.

I did know he sounded sleepy.

Then I got proof he was sleepy because his weight fell into me, telling me he was asleep.

That was when I fell asleep.

Later that morning, after the Lyft dropped us off in front of Dad’s house, I used my key to let us in.

Rix was sweaty from his run in Central Park, but mostly he was drenched because it was misty outside, there’d been a light rain a couple of times while we were out, and he, unlike I, hadn’t worn a slicker.

I felt bouncy because I’d been outside, but also it was nice to be in the cool and mist and rain. Unlike Phoenix, Prescott could be cool and even cold. But there weren’t any mists and not a lot of rain.

Oh, and because Rix was sexy when he was sweaty and damp and exhilarated after having a run.

I was looking forward to whatever was about to happen in our room pre- or post-shower.

I was looking forward to the Shake Shack.

I was looking forward to taking Rix to see Rockefeller Center and Times Square, just because everyone had to see both in person.

While we waited for the Lyft, Judge, Rix and I had decided on a whirlwind NYC tour. Thus, after lunch, we were hitting those two then going to the top of the Empire State Building. And then we’d see what else we could do if we had time.