No One But You

The three of us looked at her perplexed. He opened his mouth to say something but she didn’t give him a chance as she asked him, “Please.”

Jamie

I watched as she lit her cigarette instead of answering my question. I had a bad feeling about whatever had been spoken in that room between her, Sam and Jenna. I could tell from the way she was avoiding making eye contact with me that she was struggling with it too. She wanted to talk to me about it, but she couldn’t because Jenna had asked her not to. She handed the lit cigarette to me as I lowered the car windows and proceeded to light herself one. I took a long drag and almost coughed it all back out.

Fucking menthols.

“How do you smoke this shit?” I sputtered as I threw it out of the window. She laughed as she reached for my packet and shook one out for me, lighting it with the tip of hers before she handed it to me. “I like the almost tingly sensation on my lips.”

I looked over at her. Her wide smile telling me she was trying to distract me from my previous question.

“Why did she want me to leave the room?” I asked trying a different angle.

“Because she doesn’t want you to know what we discussed.” She shrugged in between puffs. “I can’t talk to you about this anymore, Jamie. We can discuss what you already know, but apart from that I can’t tell you anything she’s asked me not to.”

“What about Richard?”

“Since when do you care about him?”

She had a good point, but after today a lot of lines and feelings had been blurred.

“It’s not about caring, it’s that he deserves to know what’s going on with his baby and its mother.”

“Like you deserve to know because she’s Molly’s mother?” She narrowed her eyes at me.

“I need to know that she’s thinking of Molly and not just her unborn baby, Quincy. That baby isn’t a sure thing, but Molly…”

“Jamie, you can’t expect her to pick one child over another. It doesn’t work like that.” She took another puff as she tilted her head back on the headrest.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to sound insensitive. It’s just that Molly needs her mum, and I know what Jenna is like. She makes rash decisions.”

“It’s not a rash decision, maybe a scared one, but not rash and she’s going to talk to Richard about it.” She sighed. “I don’t know about you, but I’m starving.”

I looked over at her as she changed the conversation again, her chest rising as she took another deep drag from her cigarette. “This was meant to be our first proper Christmas. No work, just you, me, the girls and our family. Hasn’t really panned out has it?”

“Not the way we wanted, but it’s only just mid-afternoon. We still have the rest of the day and the evening. I just want to get home, have a shower and a cuddle with the girls. Richard said that he was going to pop by later, after he left the hospital, to see them and explain that the trip is off.”

I smiled at her calling my place home. It wasn’t the first time she’d done it, but every time she did it made my stomach fill with warmth and electricity. I liked that she thought of it as home. I wanted it to be our home.

“I know, I told him to come over for dinner before he went back with her overnight bag. Maybe we could make her a plate or something?”

She looked over at me with a surprised expression. “They’d probably really like that.” She dropped the butt out of the window and closed it.

The streets as we got closer to my building were quiet and lined with cars. It was eerily peaceful. I studied her as she looked out of the window lost in her thoughts. I could tell that she was trying really hard to keep her feelings in check. The whole situation must’ve been hitting her right in the gut, and although I wanted to make sure she was doing okay I also didn’t want to push her. She’d dealt with it all better than I had expected so far and I wasn’t going to be the one to break her down right now. Especially not when we had a house full of people and two perceptive kids that were probably dying to see us.

I parked the car in my bay and before I’d even pressed the engine off she was scrambling onto my lap over the centre console. She pulled her dress closed at her thighs as she burrowed into me. Her face nuzzling into my chest as she inhaled deeply.

“I just ne

ed a moment before we go up there and see everyone.” She whispered as I wrapped my arms around her.

She didn’t say anything else as I cut the engine with the press of a button and enjoyed the silence with her. We stayed like that for a while before she kissed the skin at the edge of my t-shirt collar and pulled herself back to her seat. She slipped her flats back on and grabbed her handbag before she jumped out. I grabbed my keys from the centre console along with my wallet and my pack of cigarettes. She looked so calm as I met her by the boot of the Range, her hand laced with mine as we walked to the lift and made our way up to our family.

The smell that engulfed me as I opened the front door was enough to make my stomach moan in delight. The TV was loud and I could only make out a few words from the Queen before the girls jumped us. It felt like we’d been gone a lot longer, and the more that Molly squeezed me in her embrace the more I could feel myself relax. She was completely oblivious to what was going on. Her excitement over all the presents that she’d already opened was infectious and it brought my own excitement back.

It wasn’t until Edith approached us that both of the girls skipped back to the lounge. Even when we were kids I was never fond of her, she was always cold towards us all. We never liked going to Richard’s house because we knew that she wouldn’t leave us alone or let us do what we wanted. She expected us to sit around and chat like we were adults, rather than act our age. If Richard hadn’t reminded me that she was still here, I wouldn’t have remembered. That’s how little I thought of her.

Once he had reminded me I was actually dreading having to come home and talk to her. Not just because I didn’t particularly like her, but because I knew that she made Quincy uncomfortable. She had no tact for someone that was so intent on propriety.