“Yeah.”
“Good. It’s only fair they face their sins.” Her mouth twists to the side like she’s trying to hold back tears, but with a blink they dribble down her cheeks. “She’s crying again.”
I look from her to Cassie and sure enough, a tear rolls down her face.
“I knew that eventually My Girl would get to her.” She says, and then asks, “Are you going to let me mop them up this time?”
“Nope.”
“God, you’re an arsehole.” She huffs, but there’s a soft smile on her face.
We both pause at the whine that follows the tears, the precursor to the silent, hiccupping sobs.
“Do you think she’s having a nightmare?” Fleur looks between Cassie and I, her face slopped downwards into a frown.
“I hope not.”
“When she wakes up and all this crap is done with, it will all seem like nothing.”
“When she wakes up, I’m never letting her out of my sight again.”
“That makes two of us.”
Her words are spoken like a promise, and it’s soothing to have someone that is as desperately needy as I am to have Cassie back. And maybe I’m wrong, but this girl is too loyal and frank to put on an act of caring.
We sit and watch the rest of the film in si
lence. I have to hand her some tissues when Thomas J. dies. We’re almost at the end, when Francis and my father walk into the room.
They’re giving me the same look. The one that says they’re here for another round of their reasoning.
The honest truth, as I look at them, is that I don’t know how much longer I have it in me to fight…alone.
Chapter 38
Leo
I can’t go in there.
I’ve been standing outside Kit’s room for the last half hour, but every time I take one step towards the door, I buckle.
Julian looks up, eyes so fucking puffy and red that they look bludgeoned. Fuck, just the sight of him makes my body threaten to collapse on itself.
I can’t do this.
The wobble of his chin sets me off, I see my every nightmare in his face. Lifting Kit’s hand, he presses it to his face like he’s trying to soak every little bit of life and warmth left in my brother into his pores.
Holding onto the door, I press inside quietly. I swear half of the monitors have been switched off, the only sounds are Julian’s sobs and the whoosh of the life support machine. The carts are all pushed to one side, against one of the walls. The room feels bigger, like it’s capable of swallowing everything.
Stopping by the foot of the bed, I stand and watch the rise and fall of Kit’s chest. I listen to the press and release of the air. It’s such a monotonous and harsh sound that it wracks every last part of me.
“I didn’t believe it was going to come to this.”
“It doesn’t need to.” I reply, barely able to keep my voice steady.
“Look at him, Leo.” He follows his own instruction to a sputtering sob. “That’s not Kit anymore. It’s just a body.”
“It’s his body. Kit’s. It’ll only ever be his body. It hasn’t given up like you all have.” I hiss at him as I round the side of the bed. “We don’t have to give up.”