Be My Hero (Forbidden Men 3)
Page 11
I inched away to give them some privacy, but also because it was just too sweet, too heartbreaking for anything I was used to watching. Closing my eyes, I pressed the back of my head against the wall and listened to them continue to make up.
"She just, when she said that—"
"I know," Reese murmured. "I'm sorry. I—"
"No, you didn't do anything wrong. And neither did Eva, really."
My eyes sprang open. Say what? Of course I'd done something wrong. I'd been the catalyst for their entire fight.
"I mean, she didn't say anything we all weren't thinking anyway, right? Why doesn't Mason just go back to doing what he was doing before? We wouldn't have money problems then."
Wait, I totally hadn't said that. I hadn't even thought it. Why had he assumed I'd suggest such a thing? Crap. Probably because I was me, and I usually said whatever I thought would hurt a person most.
Hurt them before they hurt me.
He sounded so forlorn and upset, I put my knuckles to my mouth and bit down hard. Damn, I'd only been trying to unleash his inner jerk; I hadn't actually intended to hurt him.
"I never once thought that," Reese said. "My God, Mason. Were you . . . were you actually considering it?"
"No," he mumbled. "I would never do that to you, but the thought was there. I could probably solve all our problems in one night. I could take care of you and . . . and it seems to be the only thing I'm good for, because I freaking suck as a bartender. If they don't give me more hours at the club, I'm going to have to find something else, except the only thing I've ever done that pays better than working there is—"
"Stop," Reese commanded, her voice soft yet firm. "Just stop thinking this way. Right now. There is so much that you're good for, Mason Lowe. What happened to you back in Waterford does not define you. You're an amazing, wonderful man, and I feel lucky to wake up every morning wrapped in your arms. Now just admit you're amazing, damn it. Because you are. I wish you could see you the way I see you. That bitch, Mrs. Garrison, brainwashed you into thinking you were only good for one thing when she violated you and forced you into becoming something you hated."
My eyes popped open as Reese's words echoed through my head. Violated you. Forced you into becoming something you hated.
I sucked in a silent breath as it hit me. He had been violated by the woman who'd blackmailed him into having sex with her. And he had turned into something he hated because of it. Just as I had. We were like two peas in a pod. Well, except for the fact I'd turned into a pretentious bitch that acted like I was better than everyone else so I could conceal my dirty, dark secrets, and he remained a nice guy. But, whatever. We'd both suffered from a similar kind of abuse.
Tears rolled down my cheeks. Holy shit, Mason Lowe really wasn't a bastard. I didn't even know how to process that. All these months I'd been waiting for him to show his true colors, and he'd been showing them the entire time.
In the kitchen, the sound of kissing paused just before Reese quietly asked, "Do you want me to send her away?"
My insides coiled tight, and fear seized my throat when I realized she was talking about me.
"What?" Mason sounded clueless, though.
"Eva," Reese whispered, making me tremble. She'd done it, then. All these months, she'd never taken sides. She had more reason to hate me than anyone, yet she'd remained my friend and stood up to her boyfriend to help me out. But now . . . now she was choosing him over me.
I didn't blame her, not one bit, but it still infused the fear of God in me. If Reese and Mason kicked me out, I didn't know where I'd go, or what I'd do. I wasn't hard-wired to take care of myself. I wouldn't even know how to start. And with a little one on the way, I wasn't ready to start such a task. Close to Reese was the only place I felt safe.
But she kept talking. "I know how you feel about her. I've always known. But I was so guilty after she got shot by my crazy, stalker ex; I thought I owed her something. And you were always so awesome about it, even though I knew you hated the idea and probably even hate her. And I know she has her problems, but she's my cousin and . . . Seriously, Mason, if having her here is too much for you, I'll make her go. I will not lose you because of her."
Covering my mouth to hide the sound of my crying, I waited with bated breath for Mason to decide my future. I wouldn't blame either of them for making me leave. They'd already put up with more from me than they should have, but I still prayed he'd have mercy, that he'd give me one more chance. I could be a better person; I knew I could.
I touched my belly. For this little bundle of joy, I'd be anything I had to be.
"You would really kick her out?" Mason sounded stunned. "For me?"
Reese gave a soft laugh before I heard a loud kiss. "Of course. You mean more to me than anyone."
I brushed the tears off my cheeks and drew in a deep breath. I could survive this. No matter what happened, I'd survive, even if it landed me and my baby on the streets.
"Jesus, Reese," Mason muttered. "Don't put this on me. You know I don't want her here. But I want to make you happy. And shit, where else is she supposed to go? Didn't your mom already say she wasn't having any part of it?"
"Yeah, but maybe my sister or one of my friends . . . " Reese trailed off as if she realized neither of those options would work.
"Aside from what she said tonight, she seems to be changing," Mason argued, as if he were actually coming to my defense. "I don't . . . I mean, you taught me that everyone deserves a second chance. That's something I love most about you. How freaking forgiving you are."
I nodded, agreeing with him. Reese forgave too easily. But since she'd forgiven me for things I didn't deserve to be forgiven for, it was one of the things I loved most about her too.