We both tuck our private thoughts into the silence that follows my confession.
“Well being myself comes and goes.” Grip gives me a smile that takes some of the heaviness out of the room. “We’re always tempted to
be something else when it’s easier. My mom was determined for me to go to that school, but she always challenged me to stay true to who I was.”
“It’s just the two of you?”
“Yeah, always has been.” He leans forward, elbows on knees as he speaks. “She is the single most influential force in my life. She demanded so much from me. Wanted more for me than most guys from my neighborhood end up having.”
“Sounds like you guys are really close.”
“We are. When my teacher realized I could write, she pushed for the scholarship. If it were left to me, I never would have tried. I didn’t want to leave my friends and go to a school across town with a bunch of rich, uppity kids. That was how I thought of it then.”
He glances up from the floor, his eyes crinkling at the corners.
“My mom dragged me up to that school for the entry exams and sat there while I took every test.”
My mother probably never even knew one of my teachers’ names in school. I’m the “privileged” one, considering our wealth growing up, but I feel positively deprived as Grip talks about the active role his mother took in his upbringing, in his life.
“She used to give me a supplemental book list every school year. Books she said the schools wouldn’t teach. She said don’t wait for nobody to give you nothing. Even your education you have to take. If the one they offer you isn’t enough, make your own.”
“Is that how you’re so well-read? Or at least seem to be.” I raise my brows at him. “Or maybe that’s just how you pick up the smart girls?”
“Are you a smart girl, Bristol?” His voice fondles my name.
“You can’t turn off the flirt, can you?” I ask to distract myself from the fact that it’s working.
“Was I flirting?” He lifts one brow. “I wasn’t trying to. I wasn’t gonna bother because I assumed you weren’t into the brothers.”
A puff of air gets trapped in my throat as I try to draw a deep breath. I cough, aware of his eyes on me the whole time.
“That isn’t how I decide who I’m ‘into’, as you call it,” I say once I’ve cleared my airway.
“You telling me you’ve dated a black guy before?” Surprise colors the look he gives me. Surprise and something else. Something warmer.
I wish I could surprise him, but I can’t.
“No, I’ve never dated a black guy.” An imp prompts my next comment. “What am I missing?”
The warmth overtakes the surprise in his eyes, spiking to a simmer that heats the gold in his brown eyes molten.
“Oh, you don’t want to know.” Grip’s voice goes a shade darker. “It might spoil you for all the others.”
“You think so?” A sensual tension sifts into the air between us.
“They say once you go black.” He stretches out his smile. “You won’t go back.”
A laugh pops out of my mouth before I can check it.
“And that’s your experience? Have you been disappointed by the rest of the female rainbow?”
My pulse slows while I wait for him to respond, like if my heart hammers I might miss an inflection in his voice. He puts me on high alert.
“Oh, no. By no means.” Grip leans back, considering me from under heavy eyelids. “I don’t care what color a girl is. I like the color of smart, the shade of funny, and sexy is my favorite hue.”
“If that isn’t a line, then I don’t know what it is,” I scoff, but his words tie a band around my chest that makes it harder to breathe.
“I’m not wasting my lines on you. You’re the kind of girl who wouldn’t respond to bullshit anyway.”