“No, I didn’t.”
She levels a wry look at me. “If it was anything like how you acted when you came to the studio . . .”
She leaves the rest unsaid, leaves me to replay it all in my head. Kenya did have to say I had PTSD to keep me from getting sued or arrested.
“Okay. I may have overreacted a little,” I admit. “But these bruises? I can’t let this go.”
“I told you I handled it. I already talked to him.”
I watch her in grim silence. I’m not going to talk to Chase. I’m going to punch him in the face. I don’t make any promises, don’t say a word, which seems to worry her even more.
“Kenan.” She drops her head, crazy curls all over the place, into her hands. “Please leave it alone.”
Impossible. First, he takes a photo of her partially nude without permission. Then he has the balls to display it without a release. Then he leaves bruises on my girl?
My girl.
God, that feels right. I called her my girlfriend last night without even thinking about it. It rolled right out of me and felt as natural as breathing. As right as anything good I’ve ever had.
“I don’t want you to get in trouble.” Her brows pinch and her lips press together. “You have a lot to lose, Kenan. I don’t want drama in my life putting you in the news for anything other than how amazing you are. You said Bridget ruined your life. I don’t want to do that.”
“Don’t even put yourself in the same hemisphere as Bridget,” I say impatiently. “What she did is nothing like this. She betrayed me and got me caught up in a media circus.”
“Here’s a headline,” Lotus say sardonically. “NBA player arrested for assault and battery. Would that be circus enough for you?”
“You’re right about one thing.” I frame her face, tracing the delicate bones with my hands. “I have a lot to lose.” I kiss her forehead, her temple, her chin. “I have you to lose, Lotus,” I say, pulling back to hold her troubled stare. “No one will hurt you and get away with it.”
Something flickers in her eyes, and she glances down at her hands. “Only two people in my whole life have ever protected me,” she says, her voice wobbling. “Iris and MiMi. I haven’t trusted anyone else to.”
I know someone hurt her badly in the past. Her childhood trauma. I can’t think too much about how it connects to the struggle she’s been having with sex. If it’s anything like what I’ve imagined, I’m going to lose my shit when she finally tells me. Even the thought of someone harming Lotus, my tough, tiny girl, sets bloodhounds loose inside of me.
“You trust this ring to protect you,” I say, taking her hand and stroking the ring she never takes off, “because MiMi gave it to you.”
She nods, her head lowered, linking her hand with mine.
“What if she gave me to you?” I bend to whisper over her lips. “What if I’m your gris gris now?”
Her head jerks up and her eyes, darkened with emotion, fill with tears.
“I don’t believe in spells or potions or voodoo.” I put my hand over her heart, between her bare breasts. It covers most of her torso. “But I believe in this. I believe something special is happening between us, Lotus, and yeah, I’ve been hurt before. Lied to. Cheated on, but I’m not running away from this, from you, because of it. I won’t let what happened in the past keep me from giving us a chance.”
I kiss her nose and she shifts so our lips meet and cling briefly, sweetly.
“Let me protect you,” I whisper into our kiss, my hand still covering her heart.
She nods and scatters kisses over my jaw, my neck. While we were disagreeing, I didn’t pay attention to her nudity, but it pierces my consciousness now until I can’t focus on anything else. I want to explore all her body’s secrets. To inspect the gift I’ve been given.
“I wanna look at you,” I breathe across her pierced nipple, a dusky delicacy, and walk my fingers down to the lotus flower blooming around her navel. I glance up to find her studying me studying her, her grin indulgent. I trace the French lace filigreed at the tops of her thighs. My knuckle brushes her pussy, and her breath catches. Her throat moves with a deep swallow. My cock was so far down that pretty little throat last night.
“You sucked my dick, and I almost lost my mind.”
“You ain’t seen nothing yet,” she promises with a lascivious laugh.
I grin and slide my hand between her legs. “You’re wet,” I pant, my mouth watering.
“You have that effect on me.”
I tongue the smooth skin of her belly and lavish kisses between her breasts and suck the bar in her nipple between my teeth. I look down, and she’s dropped her legs open and is rubbing her clit. Her eyes are closed. Her neck arches.