3
A trickle of people had slipped out before the end of the musical, to beat the crowd. I always stayed until the very end. It seemed unfair to slink away before you could applaud. Besides, I hated missing the end of anything. I was always convinced that the bit I'd miss would be the best part.
We joined in enthusiastically with a standing ovation. I've never lived in any city that gives so many standing Os. Admittedly sometimes, like tonight, the show was wonderful, but I've seen people stand on productions that didn't deserve it. I don't stand unless I mean it.
Richard sat back down after the lights came up. "I'd rather wait until the crowd thins out. If you don't mind." There was a look in his brown eyes that said he didn't think I would.
I didn't. We'd driven separate cars. When we left the Fox, the evening was over. Apparently, neither of us wanted to leave. I knew I didn't.
I leaned on the seats in front of us, gazing down at him. He smiled up at me, eyes gleaming with lust, if not love. I was smiling, too. Couldn't seem to help myself.
"You know this is a very sexist musical," he said.
I thought about that a moment, then nodded. "Yep."
"But you like it?"
I nodded.
His eyes narrowed a bit, "I thought you might be offended."
"I have better things to worry about than whether Guys and Dollsreflects a balanced worldview."
He laughed--a short, happy sound. "Good. For a minute there I thought I'd have to get rid of my Rodgers and Hammerstein collection."
I studied his face, trying to decide if he was teasing me. I didn't think so. "You really collect Rodgers and Hammerstein sound tracks?"
He nodded, eyes bright with laughter.
"Just Rodgers and Hammerstein, or all musicals?"
"I don't have them all, but all."
I shook my head.
"What's wrong?"
"You're a romantic."
"You make it sound like a bad thing."
"That happy-ever-after shit is fine on stage, but it doesn't have a lot to do with life."
It was his turn to study my face. Evidently, he didn't like what he saw, because he frowned. "This date was your idea. If you don't approve of all this happy stuff, why'd you bring me?"
I shrugged. "After I asked you on a dress-up date, I didn't know where to take you. I didn't want to do the usual. Besides, I like musicals. I just don't think they reflect reality."
"You're not as tough as you pretend to be."
"Yes," I said, "I am."
"I don't believe that. I think you like that happy-ever-after shit as much as I do. You're just afraid to believe in it anymore."
"Not afraid, just cautious."
"Been disappointed too many times?" He made it a question.
"Maybe." I crossed my arms on my stomach. A psychologist would have said I was closed off, uncommunicative. Fuck them.
"What are you thinking?"
I shrugged.
"Tell me, please."
I stared into his sincere brown eyes and wanted to go home alone. Instead. "Happy ever after is just a lie, Richard, and has been since I was eight."
"Your mother's death," he said.
I just looked at him. I was twenty-four years old and the pain of that first loss was still raw. You could deal with it, endure it, but never escape it. Never truly believe in the great, good place. Never truly believe that the bad thing wasn't going to come swooping down and take it all away. I'd rather fight a dozen vampires than one senseless accident.
He pried my hand from its grip on my arm. "I won't die on you, Anita. I promise."
Someone laughed, a low chuckle that brushed the skin like fingertips. Only one person had that nearly touchable laugh--Jean-Claude. I turned, and there he was, standing in the middle of the aisle. I hadn't heard him come. Hadn't sensed any movement. He was just there like magic.
"Don't make promises you can't keep, Richard."