While we all celebrated, I kept my distance from Canon. Things seemed to be getting a bit too intense with him, and I wasn’t sure I’d be able to hold onto my self-control for much longer.
Look, I was a human being, a hot-blooded woman. Regardless of the reasons I shouldn’t give in or even want him, I still had a vagina and a beating heart. The fact I also had a beating booby kind of confused the situation, but given that I was breathing still, I figured my heartbeat was more important. All of this meant I was only so strong.
As luck would have it, Canon left before I did, meaning I wore the shirt home.
I might even have slept with my nose buried in it for a couple of days, the scent of him helping the pain in my bruised tit. I could possibly also have lain on my couch after work, watching a movie with it held under my nose. And finally, I may even have used it one night to assist me with a B.O.B. moment—just not with Magic Mike until the new one arrived.
If anyone accused me of any of that, though, I’d deny it until my last breath.
And, five days later, after I washed it and drove to Kleins to hand it back to him, I may even have sat watching the washing machine feeling sad about my impending loss.
Life was such a bitch. A bit like that fucking cat.
And, regardless of the effort I put into it, I couldn’t do the splits again. Apparently, they required copious amount of wine and a Klein, things I wasn’t willing to put my body through.
CHAPTER 7
Canon
One week later…
I’d had to leave the party because I was holding on by a thread. A very, very frayed thread that was maybe five hundred years old and had survived wars, hellish seas, and harsh weather.
I was excited I was going to be an uncle again, absolutely, but seeing Jacinda do the splits, hearing them discussing her vagina, her rubbing her tit… I was just a man! I only had so much strength and will to hold myself back.
There were my brothers and their wives all discussing their good news and baby shit, and like a creep, I’d been thinking of anything and everything I could just to stop my dick from tenting the front of my jeans.
And then she’d bent over for some reason, and I’d had a prime view of her ass and could only exercise so much control. Added onto it was the fact she’d kept glancing over at me with a look in her eyes that wasn’t as cautious and stand-offish as usual.
I’d done what I could and had kept my distance, so I didn’t jump Jacinda in front of everyone. When that hadn’t worked, I’d made a weak excuse and left.
But I couldn’t stay away. It was nigh on impossible, which was why I was currently standing in front of Jacinda’s door, one week later, waiting for her to open it. I hadn’t seen her in all that time and had missed her coming into Kleins to drop my shirt off, and I swear I was having withdrawals.
A growling noise followed by “you’re an asshole!” was audible through the wooden door, and then she squealed as an angry hiss followed it, making me grin.
The door was yanked open, and my little sunshine and rainbows stood there, her glare intensifying when she saw who it was.
“You!”
Opening my arms out wide, I nodded. “Yes, my delicate little flower. It’s me.”
Surprising me, she reached out and grabbed the wrist closest to her and tugged me inside the house. “Do something with that…that… asshole.”
I looked around us, knowing full well she meant Damian but kept my face blank. “I’m assuming you don’t mean your ass hole?”
The question made her nostrils flare. “Will you quit talking about my ass hole? I still haven’t recovered from the last time you made a reference in front of Naomi about doing stuff to it. Do you know how many times a day I’m asked if you’ve been near it? One is too many, but multiple times has me imagining causing your penis an intense amount of pain.”
I covered the penis in question with both hands and took a step back from her, remembering the time she’d caused it pain without meaning to. “Ouch! I can’t help it if you’re a kinky little menace, now, can I?”
Just as she lifted her foot, no doubt to try and kick me in the balls with it, a ferocious ball of fur came whizzing out of nowhere, moving so quickly it was a blur. In fact, the only thing that let us know Damian was around was the feline banshee-like cry that came out of it as it attached itself to Jacinda’s foot, causing her to shake it around and squeal.