He stood beside the bed for a full minute, watching his lover sleep, taking in each measured breath as reassurance that he was going to be okay.
The floor creaked softly as he crossed the room and disappeared into the bathroom. He jumped into the shower to wash off a day of sweat and fear. He managed to hold it together until he was rinsing the last of the soap suds away, and then a muffled sob broke from his throat. The day’s terror and heartbreak caught up to him.
Eno braced one hand against the wall and covered his mouth to quiet the noises still escaping him as he tried to rein in his emotions.
His heart was fractured into a hundred pieces in his chest. He’d egotistically believed he knew everything there was to Rayne. He understood Rayne’s drive, his deep sense of responsibility, and his incredible strength. But he’d completely overlooked a hidden fragility that needed to be protected and cherished. He’d overlooked that he had the power to cut Rayne so very deeply with his words and actions.
Gods, what would he have done if Caelan had been a minute later? What would he do if he lost Rayne?
No, he wasn’t going to lose Rayne. They’d fix this. They’d learn from their mistakes and be stronger.
Eno plunged his face into the water, washing away the tears and using the heat to clear his brain.
Clean, he dried and turned off the bathroom light on the way to bed. As he slid between the covers, Rayne rolled into him, wrapping an arm across his chest.
“Are you okay?” Rayne murmured into his skin.
Eno tensed, freezing under him. “You knew?”
Rayne turned his face and pressed a kiss over Eno’s heart. “Of course. You love me. My actions today hurt you.”
Releasing the breath that had become trapped in his lungs, Eno relaxed and pulled Rayne closer. “I didn’t want to worry you. It’s more important that you focus on your own recovery.”
“Your feelings and pain are important too. No more hiding.”
Eno found himself smiling at Rayne’s words. “You’re right. I hurt, Rayne. Seeing you so close to death terrified me. When I think of losing you, I start to fall apart. I hurt when I think that I left you feeling that you had no choice but death. I’m scared of doing anything that would hurt you again, because I can’t lose you.”
Rayne rubbed his hand on Eno’s arm. “You’re not going to lose me.”
Eno closed his eyes and squeezed Rayne tighter. “I know, but it’s going to take some time for both of us to recover from this. Too many mistakes were made, but we’ll be okay.”
“We will.”
Eno drifted off with Rayne in his arms, his heart beating a little easier. Rayne was his happiness, and he would always protect him.
TWENTY-THREE
Drayce Ladon
Drayce smiled at the third servant he passed who looked like they were simply aching to pull the tea tray out of his hands and carry it for him. It had taken some fast talking in the kitchen to get the sweet woman to let him make the tea and pull the snacks together. She kept trying to do things for him and seemed concerned that he didn’t think she was capable. Or maybe she thought he wasn’t capable.
He got it. He truly did. If he’d attempted this in his father’s home, the poor servants would have been prostrated, their foreheads touching the cold stone floor as they begged for forgiveness because they’d clearly failed him in their jobs.
It was hard to explain that he felt like he needed to do this himself.
After plenty of smiles and playful banter, he finally got the Omari servants to relax and let him do his thing. Yes, he had no business ever being in a kitchen, but he could boil freaking water for tea. He wasn’t that helpless or clueless.
At the end of the hall, he turned into the parlor of sorts that Rayne had taken over for meetings and research. The advisor was seated on a low cushioned bench behind a table heavily covered with papers and a couple of maps of the Isle of Stone.
It had been two days since The Incident, and today was the first day Rayne was out of his room. Prior to that, only Eno and Caelan had seen him. Eno never left his side and Caelan checked on him frequently. Drayce had lingered outside of Rayne’s bedroom door a few times, listening to the voices pitched low in conversation. There was the occasional brief bark of laughter, which was heartening and left Drayce longing to join in, but he knew Rayne had needed his space.
Rayne lifted his gaze at his approach, a questioning scowl already forming on his too-pale face. He looked pinched and worn, but Caelan had assured him that Rayne was significantly improved. A part of Drayce longed to grab Rayne by the shoulders and shake him, demanding to know what he could have possibly been thinking.