The theater was nearly empty, and we had a prime spot with a perfect view of the screen. Alec placed the popcorn on the console between us. I wasn’t sure if it was to keep us from getting too close or just so I could reach it. I decided to go with the second option.
The movie was Alien.
I had seen it dozens of times and I was glad that we wouldn’t have to watch anything remotely romantic. I knew the whole movie by heart but when the alien finds its first victim I shuddered every time.
“It seems we never get tired of this one,” Alec chuckled.
We’d seen it at least five times together. “Seriously. Every time I see it, I love it more. Sometimes it takes some time to appreciate every detail about something. Like the more you see it, the more you come to like it,” I said. I glanced over at him. His eyes looked so intense. They seemed to glow in the dark of the car.
“That sounded stupid,” I said with an embarrassed laugh.
He didn’t laugh, didn’t even crack a smile, just stared at me.
“It’s not stupid. You’re completely right.” He took a handful of popcorn but didn’t eat it, just held onto it in his hand. “Do you remember the first time we watched this together?”
I nodded. Of course, I remembered. I’d been living with the FEA for only a few weeks and tried to call my mom for the hundredth time. I’d been worried something had happened to her because I could never reach her, but on that day she’d actually picked up. I’d been so happy and relieved, eager to tell her about my new classes, my new room, my new friend Holly, until she’d cut me off mid-sentence and told me to never call her again. Something had shattered in me that day, a feeling I felt unable to share with anyone. I’d hidden in the pool house, behind the bin of wet towels, alone in the dark, and bawled my eyes out. That’s where Alec found me.
He sank down on the dank floor beside me and let me cry into his chest. I barely knew him, but I felt so comfortable in his presence. Later, once I’d calmed a little, he told me the story of how his parents had abandoned him in a mall during the Christmas holidays when he was only five years old. He said the pain got better after a while, that time dulled the memories and repaired the scars. He said he understood how I felt and that it was okay to feel the way I did. Afterward we’d watched all of the Alien movies in a row until sunrise.
“That was the first time I realized how much I wanted to keep you safe,” he said. “It was the first time I met someone who understood me. Nobody understands me like you do.”
I stopped breathing and forced myself to swallow my last piece of popcorn. It was a miracle it didn’t get stuck in my dry throat. His eyes flickered toward me and I saw that for the first time in a long while, they were unguarded. He wanted me. Maybe as much as I wanted him, and yet something was holding him back.
He reached over, his thumb brushing across my cheek where a damp strand of hair had stuck to my skin. Heat bloomed under his fingertips, spreading all over me and pooling in my belly. His fingertips halted, and his gaze locked with mine, as if he still needed confirmation that I wanted this. I licked my lips and his eyes followed the movement, a muscle in his jaw moving in response. I could see the struggle on his face, feel the hesitation in his touch. Would he pull back? The air felt stifling, but I was barely breathing anyway. His hair was as black as the night around us.
His hand still rested on my cheek but slowly it began to move downward, trailing over my throat until finally it rested on my collarbone. He drew small circles on my skin.
Something changed on his face, like he’d lost the fight, and he leaned in as the popcorn bowl tumbled over, spilling its contents all over the floor of the car. Neither of us made any motion to pick it up. And suddenly there was no space left between us. His eyes darted to my lips and then, just like that, he closed the gap. His lips were on mine, soft and probing at first, and once I got past my shyness, demanding and hard. I ran my hands through his hair and down his back, feeling his muscles ripple under my fingertips. He felt so good; kissing him felt so right.
His fingers drifted over my ear, my neck, my rib cage. His touch left fire in its wake. A strange whine escaped from deep in my throat as his palms moved under my shirt and grazed my stomach. His skin felt lava-hot, yet raised goose bumps wherever it touched.