Carefully, he removes the bandage. “You’re lucky you didn’t tear anything.”
Biting my lip, I look away. I don’t want to talk about what happened.
“Evie.”
Reflexively, I look at him.
“I took you down there to choose a man to deliver my message.”
I nod, blinking away the tears that well up in my eyes.
His question is quiet, but anger sparks in his eyes. “Why did your father make you watch?”
“It was a lesson.”
He clenches his jaw. “For what?”
“Of what happens to thieves.”
“I didn’t take you down there for lessons. You believe me,” he says, formulating it like a question.
The strange thing is I do. Bell taught me not to trust him. The objective of the lesson was teaching me not to trust anyone. Yet Roman is different. He kept his word. He said he wouldn’t kill one of the men, and he didn’t. Yes, he chose his words cleverly, throwing in tonight. It doesn’t mean he won’t do it tomorrow, but we’re all right for now, and I just need one night. Tomorrow, I’ll be myself again. I’ll find new ways of fighting and keeping us alive.
He puts fresh ointment on the stitches and covers them with a clean bandage. “You don’t have to go back down there. I’ll choose a man.”
“No,” I say quickly. “I’m not weak.”
“No, Evie,” he concedes gently. “Of all the things in the world you can be, you’re definitely not weak.”
Something gives in my chest. Why am I even concerned about what he thinks of me?
Cupping my hips in a light grip, he stares up at me. “I didn’t do it to traumatize you.”
“I know.”
“It’s your right to decide which man gets his freedom.”
“All of them,” I say without hesitation.
“You know it doesn’t work like that.” He drops his hands, setting me free. “Tell me which one. I’ll send him at first light. Otherwise, I’ll choose.”
I think about it. Number Two is the most resilient. He won’t crack. Number Eleven and Number Four have families. They won’t dare spill the beans. That’s why Bell always include the family men in my entourage. He knows they’re more frightened for their children’s lives than for their own. They’ll keep their mouths shut. The riskiest candidate is Number Six. He’s young and single. Of all the men, he’s the most likely to let my secret slip.
“Number Six,” I say.
“Do you always call them by numbers?”
I shrug. “I’m not allowed to know their names.”
“Jesus.” He drags a hand through his hair. “He has no right treating you like this.”
Bell, he means. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
He gives a nod and asks in a soft tone, “Which one is Number Six?”
“The young one with the spiky blond hair.”
“Why him?” he asks, scrutinizing me.
I lie without blinking. “I don’t know. Because he’s the youngest?”
His lips tilt in one corner. “I think you do know. You don’t do anything without a good reason, do you, Evie?”
I don’t reply. Thankfully, he doesn’t push the issue.
“Are you still hungry?” he asks.
I shake my head.
He pushes to his feet. “I’ll get you a bowl of soup. I think I still have some minestrone in the freezer.”
“I’m fine,” I say, twisting the truth some more. “I can get it myself.”
Undeterred, he takes my hand. “You’re shivering.”
“It’s the anger.”
“You’re cold.” He drags his palms up and down my arms. “I’ll turn up the heat.” Tilting his head toward the bed, he orders, “Take your antibiotic and get under the covers. I’ll go get the soup.”
I pull back. “Why must I sleep in your room?”
His smile is crooked. “So that I can keep an eye on you.”
I hear the lie in his words. “I prefer that we just get it over with.”
“Get what over with?”
“Sex.”
He looks at me as if I’m a puzzle he can’t figure out. “This is how you want it? After a bad experience? No flowers, champagne, and candles?”
“I don’t want it at all. What do the props matter?”
He laughs softly. “That’s why it’s not happening, tonight.” Brushing a strand of hair behind my ear, he continues, “It’ll happen when you want it.”
“Then you’ll wait a long time.”
His smile is self-assured. “We’ll see.”
Leaving me with that statement, he exits the room.
I don’t want to act like a convalescent person, but I feel frozen to my core. If Roman won’t grant me the reprieve of sleeping alone, he’ll just have to deal with being cold. I always pull all the covers onto my side.
After swallowing the pills dry, I get into bed and rest my back against the headboard. Lying down will make me too vulnerable, so I pull the covers up to my chest in my sitting position.
A short while later, Roman returns with a tray and hands me a bowl and a spoon. “Careful. Don’t burn yourself.”
Despite my stomach being in a knot, I’m hungry. My last meal had been breakfast, and I wasted the steak he cooked. Grateful for his consideration, I dip the spoon into the soup and take a sip. It’s delicious.