“This place is magical,” I breathe. “It feels like a fantasy.”
“The universe is full of fantasies,” Zed says, “and nightmares alike. This is a very special, hallowed place. Try to behave respectfully.”
“Is the bookworm an alien?”
“It’s a construct,” Zed says. “Something made by the librarians. Those are the inhabitants of this planet. They rose from the primordial ooze, as did we all. Their mission is to preserve knowledge and cradle creativity.”
“I love it. I love this place.” I cannot stop gushing. “This is paradise. Literally.”
Zed smiles at me somewhat indulgently. It is still so strange to think he doesn’t know about the other times we have spent together. Here we might be able to finally connect. I have so much to tell him. I miss what we had when he knew who I was. There’s a distance and a disconnect between us now, even with the hot sexual interlude. It didn’t solve everything the way I thought it would. I think it might even have made him see me as more disposable, though I tell myself those are my insecurities talking.
The area where the old encyclopedias are kept is not easy to access. We have to catch the bookworm and then walk for what feels like miles through ridges and rows. A light breeze picks up and makes a rack of newspapers rattle their pages at us as we wander through.
“We can’t stay here forever,” Zed says. “But the void squid cannot consume us here. And the Aberk will not be tolerated if they come here with ill intent.”
“Why can’t we stay here forever?”
“A library is a place to stop and rest between bouts with struggles,” he says. “But in the end, you leave and you face the world.”
“So there’s no real reason we have to leave then.” I am remembering that last time I agreed to hide from the void squid, and what I ended up doing, ruining everything.
I look at him, then realize he has no recollection of what I’m remembering. This Zed is not the Zed who maybe kind of fell in love with me. This is a Zed who only just met me and wants me in the way Zed has always wanted me: sexually. That not only means my feelings are very possibly one-sided. It also means that I might not be able to trust him.
I keep an eye on him as we walk through this strange world dedicated entirely to the storage of information. This is obviously a highly protected stronghold. We could potentially stay here for as long as we need to, wrapped in all the knowledge of the world.
Finally, we reach our destination. Between towering shelves of ancient books, there are shifting shadows and little rustling sounds. It would be easy to miss the little constructions at a distance, but the closer we get the easier it is for me to see that some of the old encyclopedias have been unfolded and stacked and otherwise arranged to form a series of small homes. This is definitely a part of the library where front desk protocols are ignored. It is cozy and inhabited by a series of small aliens who really don’t want any trouble.
“We don’t want any trouble,” they say.
“Neither do we,” I reply. I feel like I’m more believable and accessible than Zed, who looms over me without trying. “We’re just looking for somewhere to be.”
The aliens are a small collection of various species. One of them faintly reminds me of the rubbery-looking, puffy-haired ladies who tried to eat me, but his teeth are not needle sharp and he has an air of subdued concern which makes me feel as though we’re not in any danger from him.
“You’re welcome to construct your own book fort,” their leader says. “But we move often. When the librarians find our homes, they inevitably destroy them. We are nomadic gatherers of information. We shelter in the collective knowledge of generations and…”
“It’s interesting,” I note to Zed, as a thought strikes me. “Librarian already sounds like an alien species if you think about it. Did humans already know the truth of their real nature?”
“There are many clues to reality hidden in common speech in all cultures,” he says. “The people who speak the words become blind to what the words mean over time, as the words become ciphers for the mundane.”
“Yes. Exactly what I meant.”
Zed looks like a big hunk of green muscle, but he’s also wickedly intelligent. I see so much dancing behind his purple gaze. In the months we spent cooped up on loser moon we got to know one another quite well. Of course, he remembers none of that, and that missing memory makes me grieve for what was.
“You stay here,” he says. “I am going to get us some food.”
That sounds really good to me. I am quite hungry. There’s something about being tossed through the belly of a giant time squid which works up an appetite.