Monday morning matched my mood: overcast and dreary. I sat up and rubbed my face, already exhausted and the day hadn’t begun yet. I had no idea how I was going to face Mitch and pretend I didn’t know him, or that he meant nothing to me.
Because he did, regardless of how things ended.
I had fallen fast and hard. Before last night, I was certain I had found the man I wanted to spend my life with, and by every indication, he felt the same way toward me.
Except, it had been a lie. And I had lived with those long enough when I was with Jay.
I ran a weary hand through my hair and got ready for work, giving myself a pep talk the entire time. I worked in the assistant pool, helping out where needed. I spent most of my time on menial jobs, assisting other PA’s with tasks, running errands, and filling in when someone was ill or on vacation. Our space was on another floor from the architects and management. I was certain that other than the occasional meeting or accidental meetup in the hall, I could avoid Mitch.
Except, when I stepped outside, he was waiting, leaning up against the outside of my building. Dressed in an overcoat that stretched across his shoulders and billowed around his knees in the breeze, he met my gaze, his expression as weary as my own.
I looked around, panicked. “What are you doing here?”
He grasped my arm, led me around the corner, and released his hold. He stood in front of me, his hands buried in his pockets. “No one from the office is going to see us, Mandy. I k
now you’re angry with me, and you have every right to be. What I did was wrong. How I handled it was wrong. I should have said something right away—given you the choice.”
“But you didn’t.”
“No. But I’m not giving up on us.”
“There is no us.”
He stepped closer. “Yes, there is. I fucked up, but I will prove it to you that you come first.”
“We aren’t doing this. From now on we’re strangers.”
His arms shot out and he tugged me close. His warmth surrounded me. He pushed my face into his chest, pressing his lips to my head. For a brief second, my pain eased with his closeness, then I pushed away.
“Stop it.”
“We will never be strangers. You feel it,” he challenged. “You felt how right it was for me to hold you. We’ll figure this out and be together.”
“We’re done.”
He slipped his hand under my chin, his thumb rubbing small circles on my skin. As soft as his touch was, his gaze was intense. “You go ahead and stay angry at me. I deserve it. But we’re not done, and I am going to prove it to you.”
His touch was so gentle, and so right. The word was out before I could stop it. “How?”
He leaned down and brushed his lips to mine. “I’ll figure it out, sweetheart. When you’re ready to forgive me, I’ll be waiting.” He stepped back. “I’ll head to the office now.”
“I am not riding the same bus as you.” I crossed my arms, angry that he could still affect me so easily. “What were you doing at a bus stop anyway? You don’t seem the sort to ride a bus.”
“Another one of the many things you’ll have to discover about me. I’m not a snob. I enjoy people watching and seeing the bustle around me. The city is too congested for another car, and I like the occasional bus ride. As for today, no I will not ride the bus with you. I’ll grab a cab. But I had to see you before I went into the office.”
“Nothing’s changed.”
He regarded me, not contradicting my words. “I’ll see you there.”
I shook my head and watched him hail a taxi and get inside. He looked over his shoulder at me, his face serious, gaze penetrating. “You’re right. Nothing has changed. I’m still crazy about you. I’ll make it up, Mandy. I swear.”
With those words, he disappeared.
* * *
I was on edge for the week, but nothing happened. Other PA’s talked about the latest hire, but I ignored them. I heard the whispers of the hot, new consultant, and a company-wide email went out introducing Mackenzie Mitchell and his impressive resume. I stared at his picture, secretly saving it on my phone before deleting the email. It was a professional headshot, and he looked every inch the serious businessman, but the slight tilt to his lips showed his mischievous nature if you knew what to look for.
I was careful about where I went, and by the end of the week, I was convinced I could do it. Avoid Mitch and pretend the weekend never happened, and I wasn’t longing to see him. The only problem was that he didn’t seem to be trying as hard. Every day he sent a text.