Damn it.
He just kept thinking about Dani.
Their team scored, and he didn’t even watch it. Sitting with a beer in his hand, he wondered what the fuck she was doing. It was a Sunday, and she wasn’t around. Her bedroom door was actually wide open and no signs of her.
“Are you even watching?” Wes asked.
“Yeah.”
“They why aren’t you cheering?”
“It was an okay touchdown. Not anything great.”
“Whoa, whoa, wait a second. What the hell are you saying?”
“We’re talking about the same thing, right? Football.” He shrugged. “I’m watching the game.”
“Guys, something is wrong with Jax. He’s not feeling okay.” Riley reached out, putting a hand to his head. “Nope, he seems okay to me, so clearly whatever is bugging him is—”
“It’s Dani,” Ryan said, interrupting.
“Dani?” All four men asked.
“It’s nothing. Just get back to watching the game.” Jax wasn’t going to be one of those guys that talked about his feelings and shit.
“He called me up early in the fucking morning asking me to give him reasons to not fuck Dani. It’s her. She’s bugging him. Has she finally gotten under that tough asshole skin of yours?”
“Fuck you, Ryan.”
“Yeah, it’s Dani,” they all said at the same time.
“I don’t need to listen to this shit.” He went to get up.
“So if you gave him a list of reasons why not to fuck her, did you think of giving him a list of reasons to?” Carl asked.
“Guys, he treats women like shit. I don’t think he should be fucking with a woman that pays half his rent.”
“That is true,” Wes said.
“This is not even a topic of conversation.” No matter what he said, none of them were listening.
“That is clearly not true otherwise we wouldn’t be having this topic of conversation right now. While football is on.”
“I don’t want to talk about it.”
“You’ve got to talk about it,” Sean said.
“Guys, have you ever thought that this isn’t about the sex? That maybe our boy likes her?” Ryan asked.
Sitting back in his chair, he knew there was no way they were going to stop until they’d gotten in their ribbing. Taking a large sip of his beer, Jax watched the game but didn’t really see it. Instead, he listened to his friends as they joked about his current predicament.
“I guess he’s not used to liking anyone, are you?” Carl asked. “Don’t worry. We’re all schooled in the art of liking women. We’ll help you out.”
“This is not happening.” He grabbed the remote, turning off the television. “You can all leave.” He wasn’t in the mood for this shit. Storming from the sitting room, he walked out onto the small balcony. Sipping his beer, he stared out across the city. So much was going on, and right now, he didn’t feel part of it.
Seconds passed maybe even minutes before Ryan came out.
“Where are the others?” Jax asked.
“Gone. You’ll make it up to them with free drinks or something. They were just having a laugh and a joke. You were the one that invited us all around here.”
“Not for that. I don’t need to talk about that shit. I’m not a fucking pussy.”
“Jax, it doesn’t make you a pussy to talk about your feelings. It also doesn’t make you weak to like a girl.”
“Are you going to try and analyze me now?” Jax asked.
“Look, I can delve into all kinds of shit with you. From your mother’s passing to your dad’s current wife. How it’s shaped you into the man you are. But I’m not going to do that because you know why you’re the way you are, and I’m not going to change your mind with it. Dani’s been in your life a matter of months, and you like her. Just admit it. Is it so hard to admit you like a woman?”
He stared at the city, refusing to look at his friend.
“I like her,” he said. “What’s that supposed to achieve? We made out.”
“What?”
“I came home and found her doing some routine on my pole. I told you that was a fucking hot idea, by the way. She was riding that pole, looking sexy as fuck, and I wanted her. I wanted to fuck her. I kissed her. She kissed me. We were getting pretty steamy, and I had her naked tits in my hands and then, poof. Nothing. She pulled away and said it wasn’t happening. I’ve not seen or heard from her since. I know she comes home. I still get my pile of clean laundry, but we’ve not talked or had any late-night binge-watching sessions.” He missed spending time with her, but he wasn’t about to tell Ryan that.
It was bad enough the other guys knew that he liked her, let alone any of them knowing he had feelings for her.
“I had no idea she could work the pole. Is she a stripper or something?” Ryan asked.