“I … when I’m with you it’s like I can’t help myself. It scares me. I don’t … I only want you, Hawk. With my ex, it was always one position, and it was so boring. I think I fell asleep a couple of times during it. I’d wake up to him snoring, and I was so unsatisfied. It was hard for me to tell him what I wanted. What I craved. I think it’s why our marriage started to fall apart. I couldn’t tell him the truth, and he didn’t know what was wrong with me.”
“There’s nothing wrong with you. He just wasn’t man enough to handle the kind of woman you are, but I know who you are. I see you, and there’s no way I’d let another man touch what’s mine.” He kissed her hard. “Don’t think for a second that I’ll share you, baby. I never will. What we have. What we share, to me that is a fucking treasure, and I’m not going to let you go. Not now. Not ever.” He kissed her again, and she moaned. “Fuck, your ass is so tight. You want to be fucked again, don’t you?”
He cupped her tits, and she arched up into his touch, wanting him, begging for him, needing only him.
This was what scared her a lot. This wasn’t just about sex.
She was starting to fall for Hawk, and if this was only sex for him, then she was screwed.
Chapter Eleven
One week later
“Prez, you heard a word I said?” Red asked.
Hawk looked up at his two men who were waiting for a response. He’d be calling church soon as they had another gun run to attend to. They were driving them across the state to hand over to the cartel for the war they were having on the streets. He should be thinking about the plan and how to execute it so his men didn’t get caught.
Gun runs were always tricky as there was a higher risk of the law following their tracks, which was why planning was always key in these assignments. He didn’t want any of his men in jail for something like this. If any of them ended up in jail it meant deals had to be made to help with protection.
Running a hand down his face, he tried to clear his head. He shouldn’t be thinking about Jasmine at a time like this. The woman had gotten under his skin, and now he couldn’t fucking focus.
“Sorry, start from the top.”
“There’s a lot of heat coming straight off the docks. We’re thinking bringing them back to the clubhouse, changing trucks, and then following this down the state line, taking back routes rather than main roads. Less traffic, less heat, and an easy deal,” Red said.
He checked across the map and stared at the path. It was one they’d done many times, but he didn’t like changing vehicles at the clubhouse. That brought too much heat home, and he wasn’t willing to do that.
Finding a location along the way, he pointed at it. “We have our boys wait here. It’s secure and covered. We change vehicles, and carry on with the mission. We don’t have anyone in town talking about a big truck that pulled into the Satan’s Rulers MC and then cops are flooding the place.”
“The sounds right, Prez,” Bear said.
Ever since he’d claimed Renee—and he had claimed her—she wore the old lady jacket and even Bear’s ring, even though it wasn’t an engagement ring. It was just a ring that Bear always wore. It was his symbol of affection and ownership to her—the fucker had been happy.
It was about time.
Hawk had also heard a couple of the bitches talking that they weren’t happy Bear wasn’t interested in them anymore.
When a guy fell for a woman, the whores lost power within the club.
He thought about Jasmine. He wondered if she knew the agency had been in touch with him and had organized a meeting. He didn’t want to worry her.
She loved her job, not that taking care of Bethany was a job for her. He saw her as his daughter’s mother more than even her biological mother.
Running fingers through his hair, he sat back. “That’s what we’re going to do.”
“Prez, you okay?” Red asked.
“Fine.”
“Look, these gun runs are a piece of piss so long as everyone’s head’s in the game. We need to know you’re with us here,” Red said.
“It’s about Jasmine, isn’t it?” Bear asked, taking a seat.
“I’m not a pussy. I’m not going to spill out my thoughts to you guys.”
“We could help,” Red said. “Give you advice.”
“I don’t need advice.” He wasn’t about to talk about his feelings or that he was in love with Jasmine.
Fuck!
Even to himself, he sounded like a pussy.
“We’re not leaving until you talk,” Bear said.
“I could make you.”