Chapter Seven
Liv
“So, he finally pulled his head out of his ass and asked you?” I acted like I couldn’t give a toss, but really, I was over the moon that my best friend, Emily, was engaged. Ryan had taken her to the park where they had their first date and had gotten down on one knee. And now, here she was, in our local coffee shop, beaming from ear-to-ear and holding out her left hand to show us the rock that we’d all noticed the minute she drifted into the place on her little cloud of happiness. It wasn’t exactly small, but in true Emily style, it was classy.
“It was so romantic.” She sighed. “The picnic, the flowers, just being together, remembering that first time.” Emily glazed over for a second as she got lost in her world of perfection.
“He proposed to you in the same place he took your virginity?” I smirked and then felt myself heat up at how crass that sounded. Like my mum always reminded me, I needed to engage my brain before I spoke sometimes.
Shit. Would Emily think I was being jealous and catty? I really hoped not.
“No!” she shot back, blushing, and I sniggered to hide my own embarrassment at what I’d said to her. “I meant the first time we were together on a date, not that.”
“But you did christen the park, or the bench at least?” I asked, because why not? They were in love. Isn’t that what being in love meant?
“Maybe. But that’s beside the point. It’s all about the wedding, and the love, and–”
“And decent sex helps too.” I shrugged and took a bite of my muffin.
“Well, yeah. Of course.” Emily’s cheeks glowed even redder, and she lifted her cup to blow on her latte before taking a sip. “You have sex on the brain, Liv.”
There are worse things to have on the brain.
“Not all the time, but if he wasn’t meeting my best friends needs, I would be having words.”
“I don’t think those are the kind of words he’d want to hear coming from you,” Effy piped up. My other best friend was usually quiet, but since finding love herself, she’d become more outspoken. It suited her. I liked that my best friends were happy and finding their voices. I wanted them to feel empowered.
“I’ll have you know I’m somewhat of an expert,” I stated proudly, and they both raised their eyebrows at me. “I might be shit at finding love, but I know sex.”
“You know sex?” Emily laughed. “Please say that a little louder, I don’t think the old guy at the back of the café heard you.”
I twisted in my chair, ready to do exactly that, but Emily’s hand clamped over my mouth, stopping me.
“Will you rein it in for one second? They’ll be throwing us out next for being too rowdy and upsetting the locals.” Emily was trying to chastise me, but the twinkle in her eyes gave her away. She loved my rebellious side, and I was never going to change. Why should I? Life was for living and I wanted to have fun. Lord knows there was enough darkness in the world.
We sat together and enjoyed chatting some more about what Emily had planned for the wedding. We were both going to be her bridesmaids, which was a relief. I really didn’t want to have to think up ways to persuade–a.k.a. blackmail–her. She told us where she wanted to have the ceremony… a nice traditional church service in Sandland. But the conversation soon turned to the usual subject of my non-existent love-life. A subject that was way more fascinating to my two friends than it was to me. What was their obsession with finding me a man? I’d given up that ghost ages ago. I didn’t need a man to make me happy.
“What do you mean there’s no one?” Emily asked. “Do you really expect us to believe that?” She twirled her engagement ring absent-mindedly as she spoke. She was one of the lucky ones. Not everyone found their prince charming in this life. Most of us settled for the understudy.
“Why would I lie?” I said, sitting back in my chair. “It’s slim pickings out there in Sandland, ladies. Be thankful you snapped up the good ones.” They really had no idea. They’d both fallen on their feet pretty damn fast if you asked me.
“Maybe you need to look further afield?” Effy added. “Or what about that Gavin guy from the pizza place? He always gives you extra wedges when we order, and he knows it’s for you.”
“Oh my God, Effy! Gavin? Are you serious? You want to pimp me out to the guy who smells of cheese every day? Thanks, but no thanks. I’d rather take my chances with the dregs left in Sandland, or worse yet, branch out into Brinton Manor. I hear the standards are pretty low over there.” My heart lurched in my chest saying the name of his town out loud. Why was that?
“Don’t put yourself down!” Effy snapped. “A guy would need to have really high standards to be good enough for you.” Then she giggled to herself and added, “But maybe not Gavin. You’d eat him alive.” She couldn’t keep the smirk off her face, and I guessed she was probably picturing Gavin the nerd, cowering in a corner somewhere, while I turned into a she-devil and destroyed him. Can’t say I’d have it any other way. He was so far from my type he was currently drowning somewhere off the Atlantic Ocean. There might be plenty of fish in the sea, but if he bit down on my line, I’d be throwing him right back to where he came from. I never did like scrawny seafood.
“I would agree, but the idea of eating him makes me want to throw up.” I made a face that told her exactly how I felt about his wedges with benefits, and she snickered. “Honestly, there’s worms in my garden with more backbone than he has.”
Just at that moment, my phone pinged with an incoming message and both of my best friends glanced down at it sitting innocently on the table in front of us.
Speaking of backbones, I also knew of someone with way too much.
“Please tell me that isn’t who I think it is?” Emily narrowed her eyes at me, but I shrugged. I had nothing to be ashamed of. So I liked playing cat and mouse with my stalker. Granted, I wasn’t always sure who was the cat and who was the mouse, but wasn’t that what made it exciting?
“Maybe it is, maybe it isn’t.” I pretended to look unaffected, even though my heart rate had just spiked. “I won’t know until I look, will I?” I knew exactly who it was. But I had to play along to save face.
“You should have blocked his ass months ago,” Emily chastised. But she didn’t get it. No one did. There wasn’t a lot to get excited about these days, since they’d all coupled up. This was my main source of entertainment. So shoot me because I got a kick out of responding to him and seeing how far I could push the boundaries. How bad could he really be? I mean, when it came down to it, he wouldn’t hurt me. Right?
“You should’ve told the police,” Effy added. “Stalking is a crime, and he’s one nasty criminal.”
Effy did have a point. Adam Noble hadn’t exactly played nice with Effy’s boyfriend, Finn, a few months ago. But I’d tried to block that out after my run-in with the soldiers in the underpass. Whatever had happened to Finn, it was over. They might call him the psycho because of what he did on the streets, but in a way, it was different for me. I was in control of this game we were playing, not Adam.
“You don’t have to worry about me,” I reassured them. “Have you ever thought that maybe I like teasing him?” I picked up my phone but gave them both a pointed stare. “He might think he’s in the driving seat, but I’m no pushover.”
They both made a rubbish effort at looking like they believed me, but I didn’t care. Their blank expressions and nonchalant glances in any direction but my phone only seemed to spur me on even more. I liked having a secret of my own. I didn’t have much else going on in my life right now.
I picked up my phone and tapped out my code to unlock the screen, and sure enough, there was his name lighting up my inbox.
Psycho: I think you’re avoiding me.
It’d been less than twelve hours since I’d sent him the photo of Ronnie. A thought that made me smirk to myself at the ace that I’d played last night. Point to Liv. Shoot your next shot, Noble. Game on with your fucked-up game of consequences, because the chips can fall any way I want them to. He needed to learn about losing, and I’d bet my ass he was a shit loser too.
Me: I’m a little busy right now, but I’d love the chance to ignore you some other time.
I smiled as I typed out my response, wondering if he could see me. I could hear the girls chattering away next to me, but I wasn’t paying attention. I was too focused on what he’d come back with.
Psycho: I don’t like being ignored. You should know that by now.
That was a standard Noble response. Playing the big man. He probably thought it scared me, but it didn’t. I was getting used to his way with words. All it did was show me that I could get to him. His closed-off answers left him wide open for my ridicule. This shit was too easy.
Me: I’ll tell you what I do know. You’re annoying. Go play freakshow somewhere else.
I knew he wouldn’t. That my response would only pull him in even further. Like a fly to my spider’s web, he just couldn’t resist crawling right in.
Psycho: Well, now I’m offended.
Nothing offended this guy. I swear I could call him all the names under the sun, do whatever the fuck I wanted, and he’d still be blowing up my inbox the next day.
Me: Oh no! You’re offended by the stuff I say? Imagine what I hold back. ;-)
I couldn’t stop myself from adding the wink emoji. Childish, but who really cared?
Psycho: I know I won’t hold back. Not when I’ve got you where I want you.
I huffed out a laugh at that, and Effy asked me what he’d said, but I wasn’t about to show them what we messaged. As fucked up as it sounded, I wanted to keep that for myself.
Me: And where exactly do you want me? Because from what I can see, you’re all talk.
I knew he wasn’t, but I liked goading him. Seeing what he’d come back with.
Psycho: I wouldn’t push me if I were you, Olivia.
But pushing him was my new favourite pastime. It was like telling a kid not to eat the sweets you put in front of them.
Me: Pushing you is what I live for.
I replied, biting my lip and waiting as the dots danced out his response.
Psycho: And breaking you is mine.
I laughed out loud, and Emily tried to crane her neck over my shoulder and get a look at what was on my phone screen.
Me: Good luck with that.
I tilted my phone so no one else could see what we were sharing. I’m glad I did, as he changed direction like he always did and started on with his game of consequences bullshit. That was something I really didn’t want anyone else to find out about.
Psycho: I have today’s game of consequences for you, otherwise known as truth or dare. So, what’ll it be, Olivia? Will you tell me a truth today, or are you ready for a dare?
I smiled, because as twisted as it sounded, I liked this.
Me: Let’s go for a dare today.
I grinned, feeling a warmth spread through me.
Psycho: Okay. I dare you to tell me your deepest secret.
I knew, in his little fucked-up, psychotic mind, he thought I’d share something of myself. But he really didn’t know me at all. I was a pro at answering questions like this. I’d been deflecting all my life so that no one could really scratch under the surface. I didn’t trust many people enough to truly let them in.
Me: Isn’t that just a truth tied up in a dare?
He’d hate that I was questioning him, but I wasn’t bothered. I could meet his challenge and piss all over it.
Psycho: Answer the question, Olivia.
Patience was a virtue he didn’t have. In fact, I doubted he had any virtues to speak of.
Me: Fine. I see dead people.
I responded, feeling like Haley Joel Osment in The Sixth Sense.
Psycho: Really?
Did he think I was being serious?
Me: No, but I keep seeing some loser in a hoodie everywhere I go. I mean, seriously, dude. Do you think you look inconspicuous? It’s beyond creepy and it’s really starting to piss me off.
I looked up from my phone and out of the window, scanning the street outside, and moments later, I saw him, sat at a bus stop like he was meant to be there. And yet, he stood out like a sore thumb. I’d taken a lucky guess with my response, and sure enough, it’d paid off. He was watching me.
Me: Catching the bus to anywhere exciting? Hell, I hope.
His hood lifted slightly after reading my last message, but I couldn’t see his face, so I had to imagine the scowl that’d probably be there. I was one step ahead of him and he wouldn’t like that.
Psycho: I think you like me watching you.
He responded, and in the back of my brain a quiet voice said, “At least someone cares.” It wasn’t that I was neglected or came from a shit family, but sometimes it was hard to get noticed. I didn’t have Emily’s classic beauty, or Effy’s perfect grace and goodness. I was just the mouthy one who most people avoided. I was told I could be too much sometimes, and a little over-bearing. But occasionally that excuse got old, and I just wanted someone to notice me. Well, someone had now, and it might not be in the conventional way, but it was attention all the same.
Me: I can’t wait for this little pearl of wisdom. Come on then. Why do I like it?
Psycho: Because you crave the attention. You want me to want you. And I do.
I couldn’t deny that his message did something to me. What he’d said made my stomach roll with nerves and excitement. This weird relationship we had going on had become a bit of an obsession for me too. I would never admit it, but I waited for his messages like a love-sick schoolgirl who sits by her phone. I bit my lip, not knowing what to say back to that. He had hit the nail on the head, but his admission that he wanted me was having an effect on me that I didn’t know how to handle. So, I decided to turn the tables.
Me: I want to know one of your deep dark secrets. I think it’s only fair. I’ve shown you mine, you show me yours.
Perfect deflection tactics. I’d become good at that growing up. I loved the limelight, but only when it didn’t put me in an uncomfortable position. The girls went to the counter for a coffee refill and left me to stare at my screen in anticipation. When his answer came back, I swallowed and took a deep breath.
Psycho: You haven’t shown me anything, and your answer was shit. But I’ll play. Those dead people you see? I killed them.
I knew there were things about Adam Noble that my brain tended to skim over, and I knew he was telling the truth. He’d killed people. He wasn’t a good guy. But what did that make me? Because in all honesty, the thought of what he could have done didn’t frighten me. It intrigued me, but it didn’t scare me off.
Me: Do you expect me to be impressed with that response?
I went for the vague, ‘I don’t believe you,’ angle.
Psycho: I expect you to know I’m not fucking joking, Olivia. Everything I say is the truth. I don’t do bullshit.
He didn’t.
Me: Neither do I.
I answered with a calmness that came from unexpected sources in my brain. I was tapping into a lot of things in my mind that I didn’t know existed lately. He made me question everything.
Psycho: That’s why I like you. You’re the same as me.
Was I? Did he think I was psychotic like him? I might be aloof sometimes, or laugh at inappropriate moments, making light of things other people saw as a tragedy. But a psychopath? I was nothing like him.
Was I?
Me: You’re mistaking apathy for psychopathy. I am nothing like you.
Psycho: If you’re nothing like me, then you’ll have no problem telling the guy sitting at the table behind you to fuck off. I’ve been watching him eye-fuck you for the last half hour, and if he doesn’t stop, I’ll be coming in there to rip his eyes right out of his sockets and shove them up his ass.
I glanced over my shoulder and my whole body tensed with revulsion when I saw Chase Lockwood sitting behind me, grinning like the motherfucker he was and then drawing his eyes up and down my body. Fuck this. If Emily saw him, she’d lose her shit. She had history with Lockwood that wasn’t great. There weren’t many people in Sandland who still gave the twat the time of day. But fuck, if I did something, it’d look like I was playing into Adam Noble’s hands.
I had two choices here.
I could piss Adam off and go and sit with Chase, make it look like I was flirting with him. But then that’d make Lockwood’s day, upset my friends and make me out to be a total bitch.
So, plan B it was. With a choice between pissing off Adam and my friends or pissing off Chase Lockwood, Lockwood would win out every day of the week. I just had to think of a way to make sure Adam knew this was nothing to do with him.
I stood up and gave the Tiffany shell necklace my gran had bought me a rub for good luck, then I picked up my coffee cup and spun around. My latte had gone cold, what with me talking so much and then typing away, but it was still almost full. I sauntered over to Chase’s table and seductively sat down on the chair opposite him, skimming one bare leg over the other in a sexy way that I knew would get his attention as I crossed my legs. Casually, I glanced over at the counter, and Emily and Effy were oblivious to what was going on, engrossed in ordering fresh drinks and chatting to the barista. I leant forward, resting my elbows on the table and ran my finger over my lips.
“Hey, Liv.” Chase leant forward and leered at me, his eyes flickering from my mouth to my tits and then back again. “I didn’t think you’d want to sit with me. But then I guess we’re more alike than we realise.”
“How so?” I cocked my head to the side, giving him my innocent, doe-eyed look, but I knew what he was getting at. I just needed him to say it out loud to give me an excuse to react.
“Well, we’re both outcasts. No one really likes us. They might pretend they do, but come on, even a girl like you knows the score.” His filthy gaze landed back on my chest, and it took every fibre of my being to keep myself in check.
“Outcasts? Is that right?” I narrowed my eyes at him, keeping the fury I felt just bubbling under the surface for a moment longer. Playfully, I ran my finger around the rim of my coffee cup, half expecting an irate Adam to storm the café and throw the table up into the air before knocking Chase the fuck out.
“You’re a tease, Liv. The girl everyone loves to fool around with. But no one will ever settle down with you. You’re the girl they fuck, not the girl they take home to their mother.” I gritted my teeth and tried to stay calm, but he leant forward and added, “Years from now, you’ll be warming some rich wanker’s bed, fucking him and sucking him off before he goes home to his loving wife and kids. You’re not a keeper, Liv. You’re trash. Dispensable. A good time but not for a long time.” He sat back, resting his arms across the top of the seat, and I snapped.
“That’s where you’re wrong, Chase. I might look like the dispensable type–like trash, as you put it–but I have more class and dignity in my little finger than you have in your whole body. And speaking about being dispensable, I think you should’ve ordered your coffee to go.” I picked up my cup and threw the whole milky mess right into his face. “If anything is dispensable here, it’s your company.”
He shot up out of his chair, gasping and spluttering, but I stood up and faced him off, putting my hands on my hips and standing tall.
“If you ever speak to me like that again, I’ll make sure the coffee is boiling hot, you arrogant prick.” And I turned on my heels, stalking out of the coffee shop as Emily and Effy called out my name and chased after me.
As soon as I got outside, I pulled my phone from the pocket of my jeans, ready to message Adam and let him know that I did what I did because I wanted to. And all the time, my legs were carrying me to that bus stop, to where he’d stood watching it all play out. But when I got there, he was nowhere to be seen.
I glanced back down at my phone and saw his response, and even though I should’ve been repulsed, what he said made me bristle with something else.
Psycho: That man is a dead man walking. No one speaks to you like that and gets away with it.
He’d been there.
He’d heard.
And now Chase Lockwood had more than the Sandland crew to worry about. He’d poked the Brinton nest of vipers and the deadliest one of all was about to make his mark.
I should’ve been scared, disgusted, worried even, but I wasn’t. I felt… weirdly proud. But fuming all the same.
What was that about?