Forever Mine (Joe & Ella 2)

He rubbed my back and kissed the top of my head. I couldn’t stop the flow of tears though, I felt broken in a way I’d never experienced before. Robyn announced that she was going to find Chris and Ed to see if they’d had any luck finding a cab, leaving me and Max alone to talk.

“Ella, he doesn’t deserve your tears, you’re too good for him. He’s a bastard and he’s back to his old ways. Honestly please don’t do this to yourself.”

I could hear what he was saying but none of it resonated with me. Yes Joe was back to his old ways, but knowing that didn’t make me feel any better. So I was too good for him? Didn’t make me want him any less. Yes we’d been through a hell of a lot of shit, but I never expected Joe to hurt me like this. Then suddenly out of the blue I heard the familiar voice that usually made me melt on the spot.

“Get your fucking hands off her Max.”

Oh God, I heard the pure anger in Joe’s voice. I couldn’t face the confrontation he was spoiling for right now.

“No I won’t.” Max snapped back, holding me tighter and kissing the top of my head in a show of defiance. I kept my face turned into Max’s chest. I couldn’t look at Joe. I couldn’t bear to see the betrayal in his eyes.

“I need to talk to Ella.” He demanded arrogantl

y.

“Not without me being here to look after her you don’t.” Max really was my knight in shining armour tonight.

He huffed impatiently, “Nothing happened Ella. I promise you, I didn’t do anything. I’m sorry.”

It didn’t matter that he was apologising. It didn’t matter that he was telling me nothing had happened. To me it had, he’d kissed her in front of me, groped her ass and had every intention of taking things further. So he got an attack of guilt, that made no difference to how I felt right now. The damage was already done.

I heard a car horn and then Robyn’s voice calling my name. I turned to see my lovely friends waiting for me across the road in a cab. I pulled back and looked up at Max.

“I’ll call you tomorrow okay.” I stood on tiptoes and kissed him on the cheek, then ran across the road to the cab without a backwards glance. I heard Joe call my name but I ignored him. My escape route was set and I was out of here.

21

As nights go, last night would probably go down as one of the worst of my life ever. It was a night I would never forget and never wanted to remember as long as I lived. It was the night I realised I wasn’t over Joe, I still loved him, but he was over me alright. That much was clear from the performance he’d put on. Even Adam hadn’t made me watch anything like that. How Joe could be so cruel after what we’d had hurt me deeply. Maybe we hadn’t been as close as I thought we were. Perhaps my feelings ran deeper than his? Whatever the truth was, I knew I had to pick myself up, dust myself off and start to rebuild my life without looking back at what could have been. Last night had been the final nail in the coffin of our doomed relationship.

Robyn suggested online dating, I hated that idea. Meeting strangers based on your looks or some false profile used to lure you in didn’t appeal to me, no thank you. Ed said he knew loads of straight guys who would die for a date with me, but I was not going to be set up. No way. Blind dates were always a disaster and I didn’t want to start upsetting Ed’s friends when I bailed on them. I’d only just met Ed and I didn’t want to get on the wrong side of him. No, Chris had the best suggestion.

“If you want to meet good guys, you need to be in places where good guys go. Join a gym or better yet open your eyes when you’re out Ella. The amount of guys who check you out even when we go to get a coffee is insane. One smile from you and they’d come over. If you make it known you’re available they’ll come flocking around you. At the moment you’re closed off, you have that unapproachable air about you that can frighten nice guys away. Trust me…relax…smile more… and just be you.”

He was right, I did feel closed off and no doubt that showed on the outside. I had to start moving forward now. I would make more of an effort. Operation get my life back was well and truly underway and I was going to start making more of an effort, no matter how petrified I felt about it.

“Let’s go out for lunch today.” Chris announced in the office around midday. I was loaded down with work but I needed a break, my head was banging.

“Okay, that sounds good. I could do with the change of scenery.” I smiled.

We headed out into the street and made the short walk to a trendy bar called ‘The Bank’. It was always heaving with city types, the bar area packed and the air full of voices discussing the day’s trading or a new deal in the pipeline. We found a quieter table towards the back of the bar and ordered a glass of wine each as we perused the menu.

“Ed comes here quite a bit so don’t be surprised if he pops up whilst we’re eating.”

I trained my stare onto Chris and my heart froze.

“What have you done Chris?”

“Nothing!” He looked guilty as hell and I wasn’t buying it. “Ed mentioned he was coming here with a friend today and I thought we could make it a foursome.”

I put my elbows on the table and covered my face in despair.

“Chris, no! I am not doing a double blind date with you and Ed. I told you I don’t want to be set up. Oh my God I’m mortified, I’m leaving.”

I got up from my chair to leave but Chris shot up.

“Ella, you can’t they just walked in, please just stay for half an hour. Then you can make an excuse and leave but please don’t bail on me now.” He put his two hands together in prayer and gave me his puppy dog eyes and I glared at him.

“You owe me big time Chris. This right now, it’s so not cool.” I shook my head disappointedly at him, and plonked myself back into my chair on a huff.