Luca

Seven years ago…One week before they left me…

“They’re called constellations Chloe, a group of stars that form a pattern up in the sky. Look over there is Ursa Major. Some people call it the big dipper but that’s only part of it. It’s more like a big bear. Can you see it Chloe?”

Freddie and I were lying in his back yard, our bodies flat out on the rough patchy grass and our eyes searching up in the night sky, stars twinkling innocently above us.

“I don’t even know what I’m looking for, it all just looks like stars to me Fred.” I squinted as if that would help some amazing star pattern suddenly come to life in front of me,

“There, those seven stars,” he pointed at the sky his head touching mine as he leaned across, I still didn’t see anything but I liked being close to my surrogate brother. It made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

“Oh yeah.” I lied because I guessed I could lie here all night and still not see what Freddie saw but I hated to upset him.

He loved the stars and space, anything that wasn’t of this world. I think it gave him a release from his rotten life back here on earth. Helped him to remember that even when things got too much or too unbearable we were all just smaller parts of a bigger realm called life.

“The stars in the night sky are like a map Chloe. If you can find Ursa Major you can find the North Star. Centuries ago before people knew their way around like we do they used the stars to guide them.”

“Like in the bible yeah I heard those stories. I’m glad I wasn’t alive then I’d have been lost forever. I’m rubbish at reading maps but a star map, forget it. I have no idea what goes where and you tell me most nights Freddie.”

“You don’t give yourself enough credit Chloe. I bet you can still find Orion. Remember Orion’s belt, those three stars are the easiest ones to find. If you can see those you’ve found Orion.”

“Yeah I see them.” No I didn’t but I would never burst his bubble and admit that.

I heard the crunch of his boots and felt the familiar shiver trickling down my spine before I heard his voice break through the silence of our star gazing.

“What the hell are you two up to?”

Luca stood towering over us, his hands stuffed into the pockets of his jeans and his eyes looking accusingly from me to Freddie as if he’d caught us doing something we shouldn’t. Was that jealousy I

detected behind his glare? Probably not but I could always hope.

“I’m teaching our sis about the night sky.”

Freddie rolled his head towards Luca, then he looked at me and gave me a cheesy smug grin.

“Yeah I’ll be able to navigate my way through the desert soon. Go me!” I rolled my eyes back at Freddie and he chuckled.

“We’ll always be with you Chloe no need to navigate yourself anywhere.”

I liked hearing that, it made me feel safe and…loved.

“Dad wants you inside Fred, he’s had a letter from your school he wants you to explain. Sorry bro I tried to sort it for you but he wants you.”

Freddie winced and lay still for a minute before huffing into a sitting position then standing. Luca sat down next to me as he did, and I stayed lying down attempting to keep my breathing steady whilst Luca was so close to me.

“If I don’t come back out again in ten minutes come looking for me.” He gave his big brother a stare that said ‘I mean it, come save me’ and Luca nodded back at him.

Once Freddie had disappeared inside Luca lay down next to me. I was hyper aware of the heat from his body so close to mine making my skin tingle and my body clench in ways I didn’t understand. I just wanted to turn my head and kiss him, roll onto my side and pull him closer to me. I was always doing the chasing as far as Luca was concerned, but I wanted him and if you wanted something or someone so badly you had to fight for it right?

“So what are we looking at?” His deep voice sent my heart into a flutter, I found it so hard not to touch him.

“You know what, I have no idea. Stars, just night sky and stars but don’t tell Freddie I said that, I’d hate to break his heart.”

Luca chuckled softly beside me then turned his head to face mine. I did the same, our lips were literally inches apart, we were so close it felt insane. This felt like a ‘moment’ for us. Finally.

“What are you thinking about?” He asked furrowing his brow.

“Do you really want to know?” I bit my bottom lip not meaning to look seductive but I guess that’s how it came across to Luca.

“Always. I always want the truth from you Chloe.”