Donuts and Handcuffs

“Shh,” I murmured, scooping her up and pulling her so that she was sitting in my lap. “Bailey, my last relationship was a mess. A nasty woman named Ashley wanted me to be all sorts of things that I wasn’t. Then she behaved like a spoiled child, tap danced on my heart and flounced away. I was alone for a couple of years, with no idea what I really wanted. Now, I know that everything I want is you.”

I kissed along her cheekbone as she melted against me. “We don’t have to have labels,” I whispered. “We don’t have to be super serious right away. I care about you, I want to spend time with you, and I want to snuggle you until you make this little noise…” I nibbled a patch of skin just under her ear, making her giggle softly.

“That’s probably as much as I can handle right now,” she said. “Is that really okay with you?”

“Yes. Absolutely.”

I didn’t intend to be dishonest with her. Yet there was no way I could tell her that I was becoming obsessed with her. I dreamed of her lips. Her bright, clever eyes. The thoughts of keeping her safe, protecting her from the world, ran through me as regularly as my own blood. I knew I had to go slowly so that I didn’t frighten her, but my feelings for this sweet, precious girl were already taking up a lot of space in my mind at all times.

Her lips parted, allowing my tongue to slip into her soft mouth. Her fingers tangled in the back of my hair as her soft moan made my stomach clench with raw desire. Gliding my hand along her back, I slid my fingers under her arm to cup her perfect, tender breast. Instead of pulling back or shifting position, she whimpered softly, moving against me.

She wanted me. I could feel her desire as her thighs tightened, her hips wriggling slightly in my lap. I could have tried to be content with another amazing makeout on her couch. But then her hip ground into my arousal in a way that certainly wasn’t an accident. This time I moaned softly, running my thumb around her nipple as she nearly purred in my hands.

Something inside me snapped, and I knew I just couldn’t wait any longer.

CHAPTER TEN

The butterflies swirling in my belly were becoming restless, and I was losing my breath. My skin was twitching with need, as my brain glitched with indecision.

My entire body was pressing against Daniel as if every inch of contact was important to my survival. The feeling of raw need that I had for him was coursing through my veins, altering my heartbeat. This wasn’t lust, this was something that my body required or it might actually explode from frustration. The feeling of losing control, of giving myself to him, felt like absolute bliss.

Having him guide my breath as we kissed endlessly felt like a perfect surrender. I needed to decide immediately though whether I knew where I wanted to draw a line, if at all.

“I want you.”

His whispered declaration rang through the room, stopping our sweet kiss like a slammed door.

“I...” Whatever section of my brain usually created words suddenly took a coffee break. All I could do is blink at him.

“Shh, I’m sorry,” he said immediately, sitting us up and curling me into his chest. He looked down to study my eyes, my hand reached out to cover his heart. The beat was quick and twitchy, and I realized he was nervous. That was odd.

“You’re not ready,” he murmured. “I’m so sorry, Bailey. It’s okay. I don’t want to–”

“No,” I whispered quickly. I’d be damned if I let him think of me as a broken little bird. “I’m just... surprised.”

“Surprised that I’d want you? Are you insane?” His thick fingers ran across my cheekbone, down my jaw, back to my mouth. His thumb trailed along my lower lip, tugging it down slightly until I had to choke back a giggle. “Bailey, you’re incredible. I’m sorry I blurted that out. Sometimes it’s hard to control myself around you. I just want to touch you, hold you. Be close to you.”

There was no way that I could confess all of my sins to him. But maybe just one.

“It surprises me how much I want you to hold me. Um...” I took a slow breath. “Where I come from, big guys were always rough. So, I’m sorry it took a little time before I could relax around you.” Something in his eyes tightened, as if I’d struck a nerve. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to–”

“Shh, it’s okay. I’ve known men like that, and I hope that you know by now that I’m nothing like them.”

I nodded, then laughed, poking his chest. “Except for the muscles, which are remarkably similar.” He tugged my lip until I nodded again. Without even realizing what I was doing, I unfastened the top three buttons of his shirt so that I could place a hand against the warm skin of his broad chest.

“Hey, I’ll tell you a secret,” he said. “You’re stronger than you think. It took three nurses to pull you off me in the hospital because you wouldn’t let me go.”

My eyes clamped shut and I wanted to disappear for a second.

“No, Bailey, please don’t be embarrassed. I didn’t mean it like that.” It was hard to meet his eyes, but he was smiling gently. “You were exhausted, and in your fuzzy state you didn’t want your comfortable warm pillow to leave. It was adorable, and it was killing us not to laugh and wake you up completely.” He kissed my forehead gently. “What I meant was that when you let your walls down, you know you can trust me. Or at least your subconscious can. That makes me extremely happy.”

I felt some of my stress slipping away. A much different sort of tension was brewing, making me feel twitchy and breathless. I shouldn’t be feeling it in my inner thighs when he looked at me that way.

“I want to make us both happy,” I whispered. Then I stretched up to kiss him again, wrapping my arms around him and pulling my body against his in a way that announced precisely what I wanted. From the way his hips moved toward mine, he felt it too.

“Bailey,” he breathed, “I’m making no assumptions, but would you like to show me your bedroom?”

Standing up, I took his hand and led him into the other room. Turning on just the tiny bedside light, I sat on the e