Tortured Souls (Rebels of Sandland 2)

“I’m not trying to tell you how to feel, but I’m not the devil you’ve been painting me out to be.”

I didn’t want her to hate me. Not really. But I didn’t know what to do to change it. I thought knowing I was Legion would make her see me in a different light, but it did the opposite.

“Oh, you’re just a born-again saint, aren’t you? So, all the stalking, the flowers, and messages, that’s the actions of a sane and guilt-free person, is it? I don’t know what fucking planet you’re on, but in my world it’s not okay to do that. You scared me. You made me feel like I was going insane.”

“I made you feel alive again,” I said through gritted teeth. I felt agitated that she wasn’t getting this.

“So fucking what? How can I be alive if I’m scared to leave my house?”

“I’d never hurt you. Not like he just did. It’s your friends who’re your enemies, not me.”

I was losing control. Losing the grip on this exchange with every word that came out of my mouth.

“There’s more than one way to hurt someone, Brandon. You did it in the worst way, without ever using your fists. You hurt me in here.” She thumped her chest and then she tapped the side of her head. “And in here. That shit does more damage than anything. You knew what you were doing, but you did it anyway. You didn’t care.”

“I did… I do care. Please, Harper. Try and let me explain. I know I sound fucked-up, but I only did what I did to get closer to you. I wanted to help heal you.”

She shook her head and backed away from me, putting her hand on the door handle to show she was almost done with this conversation.

“You’re really good at pushing yourself forward, aren’t you? Making yourself heard. But you don’t listen.”

I had no idea what that meant.

“Then tell me. I’m listening now.”

“I don’t want you here. I don’t want you following me or leaving me anything in my garden, kitchen, or anywhere else. That chatroom… it was a lifeline for me. You’ve destroyed that.”

I was her fucking lifeline, not the bloody chatroom. Didn’t she realise that?

“We can still go on there,” I said, trying to make her see that it wasn’t all totally lost. “If that’s the way you want to talk to me for a bit, then we can use that.”

“We’re not friends, Brandon. I don’t want to talk to you. Not in real life and certainly not in that chatroom.” She sighed. “You might be listening, but you aren’t hearing what I’m saying. I don’t want you in my life. You’re the reason my life is the shit heap it is. The only thing you can do to make that better is disappear.”

She may as well have stuck a knife in me with those words. The last thing I wanted to do was disappear. It was never going to happen.

“I’m not going anywhere,” I said defiantly.

“Then maybe I will.”

I froze. She wouldn’t leave Sandland, would she?

“You’d leave here because of me?” I couldn’t explain why, but there was a lump forming in my throat, making it difficult to speak.

“Anywhere would be better than being here watching you act like nothing ever happened.”

Whatever I did next, I had to make sure she didn’t leave. I needed to say the right thing. Whatever that was.

“Fine. You want space? I’ll give you some space.”

“I don’t want space. I want to be left alone.”

I bit my tongue, knowing whatever response I gave would hurt one of us. Instead, I took my own step back and in a low voice I told her, “This isn’t over.”

“It is,” she replied, opening her door and slamming it shut behind her.

I stalked down the driveway feeling like my heart was being twisted and contorted in my chest. I was close to breaking point. I didn’t want to walk away from her, and I couldn’t give her fucking space; I didn

’t even know how. I was so wound up I needed to offload. I knew Finn would be fucking useless. His experience with women was zero to none and he wasn’t the chattiest fucker. Zak would give me some flowery bullshit, and despite his proven record of success with women, I doubted he’d know what to do with a girl like Harper. No, I needed a dose of brutal reality from my best friend who’d always give it to me straight. So, I headed to Ryan’s garage. I knew he’d know what I should do next, because me? I didn’t have a fucking clue.