Tortured Souls (Rebels of Sandland 2)

And he didn’t.

Whatever that woman had done in her life, it was no reflection on him. He’d come out relatively unscathed considering what a major fuck-up she was. I doubt many people would survive a childhood with her playing a starring role. No wonder he had issues forging relationships when that was what he had to base his experiences on.

“I can’t believe that… woman back there gave birth to me. I feel ashamed.”

I felt another flip of my heart, hearing him sound so tortured and alone.

“Don’t ever be ashamed of who you are, Brandon. She’s the one who should feel shame, not you.”

I didn’t know if he was hearing what I was saying. He could barely look me in the eye, preferring to glance down the alley or at the floor than look at me.

“She’s probably forgotten me already… Again,” he said on a whisper. And I knew in that instant that it didn’t matter what she did or how many times she denied him or put him down. He’d always want her approval; her love. He was a boy who’d never felt a mother’s love. That had to hurt harder than anything in life. Maybe just as much as losing a twin.

Maybe.

“Then that’s her loss. She doesn’t deserve to have a family. She doesn’t deserve a son like you.”

“A son like me? What, a fucked-up head-case who stalks girls he likes. Who’s only skill in life is hitting people and causing absolute fucking mayhem.”

And that was it. My heart was well and truly gone.

“You like me?”

He smirked and shook his head.

“That’s what you took from all that?”

“Brandon, I’m not gonna pretend I understand anything you’ve done in the past, but in a way, after seeing that tonight, I kind of get it. You haven’t had the best family life.”

And you have absolutely no idea how to handle your emotions because of it.

“Other people have it worse.”

And a lot more have it better too.

“You’re forgetting who you’re talking to. I know what she said to you when you were little. I know the damage she caused.” I couldn’t stop myself from reaching forward and brushing my fingers over his stomach, knowing what lay underneath that t-shirt. Feeling his warmth on my fingertips made my whole body heat up. That magnetic pull he’d had on me back at the bar was still as strong in this alleyway. “I know what damage they all did… And I’m sorry. I am so, so sorry.”

His eyes never left mine as he held his breath, then he looked down to where my fingers were touching him and let out a deep sigh.

“We can’t take on the sins of our relatives,” I said, willing him to look at me. “I think we both know that.”

“I know. But it doesn’t stop the guilt, does it? I could’ve done more.”

“What more do you think you could’ve done?” I asked, peering up into his eyes.

“I ran.” He rubbed his hands over his face and groaned. “I bottled it and I ran away. I should’ve stayed and helped you.”

“I wouldn’t have let you.”

“Will you let me now?”

He hung his head and the look on his face made my heart ache for him. He looked so lost, hiding here in the darknes

s.

“I know you like to hide this part of you. A bit like you’re hiding now. You don’t want people to see the darkest parts. But I want to see them. You’ve seen mine. You’ve seen me bent over in the dirt, broken and crying.”

“Because of me.” I heard the hitch in his voice. This was the rawest I think I’d ever seen him. He was putting himself out there, letting it all go, for me.