This Cruel Love

“Hell if I know. The guy’s a douche, but I thought he might want to help his friend.”

“Some friend, Rye. He’s done fuck all to help Justin these past few months.”

Travis clamped his mouth shut then, realising he’d said too much.

“You knew?” I tried to rein in my fury, but it’d started seeping out of every tiny pore. “You knew about Justin’s drug problem and you didn’t think to tell me? What the hell sort of brother are you? What sort of friend? You two were inseparable the last time I was down here. He’s been your friend for years. What happened? Did you just dump his ass when the going got too tough for you?”

“It wasn’t like that, Rye. I wanted to tell you, but he begged me not to. I tried to get him help, but he kept saying he could get himself clean. I thought he was handling it. I’m so sorry. I know now how shitty that looks. Honestly, if I had any idea about the state he was in, how far down that rabbit hole he’d fallen, I would’ve done more, I swear. I’ve kinda been… distracted lately.”

I could see my brother was hurting, and to be honest even I was struggling with the new and so not improved Justin. I couldn’t berate him for what had transpired. Justin was a grown man; he had to take some responsibility for this. We were the pawns in his game of life. He was the master of his own destiny.

“How’s he been?” I gestured to the closed bedroom door behind me, where my strung out fiancé lay drowning in his demons.

“He’s moaned, whined and called me every foul name under the sun, but I just gave him my version of a pep talk and left him to wallow.”

I nodded. I wasn’t looking forward to meeting that version of Justin later.

“So, what’s happening with you, bro? You look like shit.”

“Thanks. I feel like it too.” He smiled sadly then rubbed his hands over his face. “Cassie and me… I think it’s over.”

“What? But you guys are perfect for each other, what happened? Did she cheat on you?”

I was getting ready to storm round to Cassie’s and give her a piece of my mind. Travis was a good guy, a great catch. If she’d fucked him over, I’d make her pay. My revenge plan fell short as soon as I saw my brother’s guilty face.

“Travis, what did you do?”

“I didn’t mean to hurt her. I didn’t mean to hurt anyone, it just kinda happened. I met someone. She… bewitched me.”

“Jeez bro, we’re not in a Twilight novel. Bewitched, my ass. What the hell is wrong with you?”

“I don’t know. I thought I had it all figured out. I loved Cass. I do love Cass. But this girl, Ryley, she… I don’t know. I can’t explain it, but I’ve fallen for her hard. I can’t marry Cassie when I’m in love with someone else.”

“Like hell you can’t. You need to do the right thing, Trav. You need to be honest with her.”

“That’s the problem. She’s already found out, and in a fucking brutal way too.”

“How? What happened?” I sat down next to him and put my hand on his trembling knee to show him some support, even though I could’ve throttled him for being so weak.

“She caught us… in a hotel room. Shit, Rye, it was bad. Really bad. I’ve no idea how Cassie knew we were there in the first place, not to mention how she got hold of a key card for the room, but she did. How the hell are we supposed to get over that?”

“Fuck. That’s so bad.”

I couldn’t imagine how Cassie must’ve felt seeing that. I’d have probably thrown up if it was Justin with someone else. Cheating was a massive no-no for me. It was something I’d certainly never forgive, ever.

“She stormed off, obviously, and is refusing to see me now.” He hung his head down and sighed like it was his last day on earth.

“Can you blame her? I’d have kicked your ass, and the whore you were with. Where does she figure into all this?”

“That’s the thing, Rye. I have absolutely no idea what the deal is with her. One minute she’s telling me she loves me and can’t live without me, then next thing I know she just ups and disappears. I don’t know where she is, or why she’s gone. I’m gonna sound like a paranoid freak, and I don’t know for sure, but I feel like someone’s out to get me. I can’t bring myself to believe that Lilly would just up and leave me like that. Something’s not right. How did Cassie get into that room? Did Lilly tip her off? Or someone else? Jeez, I just miss her so much. She’s the sweetest, kindest-”

“Biggest whore to walk the planet, and you’re no better either.”

He turned to face me, giving me his most intense stare. “Don’t say that. You don’t know her.”

“No, but I know Cassie, and she’d never do anything to hurt you. She doesn’t deserve this, and to be honest you don’t deserve her, Trav. I love you and you’re my brother and all, but you’ve been an ass. The worst kind. I wouldn’t blame her if she never forgives you for this, but you could at least try to make it work.”

“But what if I don’t want her forgiveness?”