This Cruel Love

“You’re right. It doesn’t make sense. I can see that now.” I’d have said anything to make her feel better, but I didn’t believe it for a second. “At the time, it was all I had to cling onto. I needed some type of justice for my father, so I made your dad the focal point for my revenge. I’m sorry.”

She rocked back and forth, deep in thought and struggling to comprehend it all.

“Is that how you became homeless? Did you lose the house after your father died?”

“My dad had a will, and he left one hundred percent of his estate to me. He put it all into a trust fund for safe keeping. I was supposed to live with an aunty, his sister, who had control of the money until I came of age. She pissed the lot away though, and I ran away when I was fifteen. I didn’t see a penny of my father’s money, but I didn’t care. I was verbally and mentally abused by that bitch for a year before I got away.”

“I don’t know what to say,” she gasped.

I reached forward and pulled her towards me, resting my head on her stomach as she stood in front of me.

“Say we can move past this. Tell me you won’t let the hatred that ate me up for so many years ruin the one good thing that’s come into my life. I’ve got this searing pain in my chest, Ryley, and the pressure is making it hard for me to breathe.”

I wrapped my arms tightly around her, willing her to accept me for who I was. A dark, damaged man with issues as long as the river Thames and probably as deep and murky too. But with her, I could face anything. I needed her like I needed my next breath.

“I feel the same,” she said, stroking my hair, and then she leant forward and wrapped her arms around my quivering shoulders. “I don’t want hate and violence in our lives. But I have to know this ends today. I need to know you don’t blame my dad. He’s innocent.”

I lifted my head to look at her. I needed her to fully understand what I was about to say. Not just to listen to me, but truly hear me.

“I’m always going to be honest with you, Ryley. I know I have my flaws and I’ll always own them, every single one. Your brother, Travis, he’s a selfish, self-centred prick. It took him three days to jump into bed with Lilly after proclaiming undying love to his fiancée. As for Justin, he doesn’t think twice about videoing himself fucking God knows who behind your back, and leaving you vulnerable so he can stuff his body full of shit. Mason, that evil fucker? He drugged women and brought his own brand of hell into those seedy hotel rooms. And me? What have I done other than try to defend the people that I love? Take revenge against those who’ve wronged me and mine. It might not sound right to you, but at the time it did to me. I felt justified.”

“Do you still want revenge?” she whispered.

“No. Not anymore.”

“Why not? How can you say you don’t want revenge after planning it for all those years? How can I trust that you’ll stop this?”

I took a deep breath in. “Because I love you, Ryley. I love you more than I ever loved my father. And that’s why this all has to stop. For the last seventeen years, I’ve lived a life of bitterness, and my hunger for revenge has clouded every single judgement I’ve made. I’ve been dead inside. You woke me from that, Ryley. I thought destroying you and your family would end all the pain for me, but I was so wrong. The day you walked into my life, I started living. You radiate so much goodness, so much light, you’ve chased all the darkness away. You planted seeds of hope for me, for a life I never thought I could have; with love, warmth and affection. With family. I’ll always be eternally grateful for finding you, and having you in my life. You give me life. You’re like the missing part of me I didn’t even know I was looking for. The last puzzle piece to make it all complete. I’ll never let you go. I can’t. I love you.”

A tear trickled down her delicate face, and I reached up to brush it away.

“I love you too,” she said as she started to cry. “I love you more than I’ve ever loved anyone.”

I stood up and wrapped her up in my arms. Nothing and no one would ever come between us again. I would move heaven and Earth to make sure of it. She was mine and I was hers.

RYLEY

He enveloped me in his strong arms, then whispered into my neck, “I want to make love to you, angel. I need to make this right.”

I wanted to be as close to him as I could be in that minute. He was like air, water. He was my whole life. I couldn’t be without him.

“Okay,” was all I could manage as my breathy response.

He leant down to kiss me, his lips soft and gentle, coaxing me to join his in the light, seductive massage that sent tingles down my spine and made my skin prickle. His tongue licked and stroked against my lips then into my mouth, sliding against my own and drawing a moan straight from the depths of my soul. His hands held my head in place, threading his fingers through my hair and tugging lightly, so I tilted to the exact angle he wanted me.

He moved his skilful lips to my neck and licked along the sensitive skin behind my ear. Then he pulled back and stroked his thumbs across my cheeks. He dipped his head until his forehead was touching mine.

“You have no idea what you do to me, do you? You consume me, angel. I want to kiss every inch of your beautiful body, and make you scream my name over and over again.”

“Do it then.” I smiled seductively, eager to get to the screaming his name part.

He pushed me backwards so I fell onto the bed, and I lifted myself up onto my elbows to look down to where he stood over me. I licked my lips and pulled myself farther up the bed, subconsciously inviting him to join me, cover my body with his and make me feel as good as he promised. He took the hint and loosened his tie, then pulled it off his neck and threw it down to the floor. He started to unbutton his shirt, but I shook my head.

“That’s my job,” I purred, as I sat up, reached forward and ran my hands down his chest. I made quick work of the remaining buttons and slid the shirt off his muscular arms. He crawled forward, forcing me onto my back as he took his place over me.

“Now for my job,” he growled low, pulling the straps of my dress down to expose my bra and placing delicate kisses along my shoulder and down across the top of my breasts.

“You have the softest skin.”