I felt my body go stiff at the mention of his name, my breath catching in mid-air as my throat closed over so tightly I felt like I was being strangled. Images of Justin lying in a pool of blood on the floor made me go dizzy. I reached out to grab something, anything to steady myself, and I heard Travis’s voice in my ear, urgent and authoritative.
“Breathe, Ryley. Just fucking breathe.”
I leant against one of the high stools Mum had scattered around the kitchen and practised breathing. In through the nose, out through the mouth. Calm and focused, just like Jackson had taught me. Hell fire, maybe I did need that counsellor more than I realised. I wasn’t used to having panic attacks, but they seemed to be happening more often these days. I suppose, after everything that’d happened to us, it was no surprise.
“Are you okay, sis?” The colour had drained out of Nate’s face, and he looked like he needed as much comfort as I did. “I guess he did a number on you, huh?” I nodded and Nate sighed. “Shame. I kinda liked Justin. He was a laugh. But if he treated you like a douche then he’d better stay out of my way.”
“You’re sweet, little bro.” I grabbed his face in both my hands and squeezed his cheeks together like I used to when he was a kid.
“Is this new one an upgrade? Will I like him?” Nate seemed nervous as he spoke. I guess being seventeen and having a new guy come into your family to be with your sister was kind of daunting.
I gave Travis another death stare for good measure, but he knew better than to butt in this time.
“He’s way better than Justin. He can be a little shy at first. It takes a bit of time to get to know him, the real him.” I looked towards Travis as I said this. “But he’s smart and funny. He plays the piano better than Dad, but don’t tell Dad I said that. He’s just… lovely. You’ll love him, Nate. I do.”
Nate grinned and ran his fingers through his jet black hair, something he hadn’t inherited from either of us. We all had blonde hair, Mum and Dad included. I guess it was a throwback from somewhere down the family line.
“As long as he’s good to you, then that’s good enough for me.”
Travis made us coffee and stood next to me, rubbing my back and helping to bring me down from my earlier freak out. I was doing that annoying sisterly thing, grilling Nate about the girls in his year and whether he was dating, when the air around me changed. I felt him before I saw him, I always did. Sparks flying, butterflies dancing and every part of my body on high alert because he was here.
“I need to get to work. I’ll see you later, sis.” Travis leant down and kissed my cheek, then waved over to Nate. “Later, bro.”
He didn’t acknowledge Jax as he pushed his way past him and out of the door. It was a start, a level up from trading insults and trying to fight each other. I’d take it, for now.
I swivelled around on my stool, and when I saw him standing there, looking all formal and anxious as hell in the doorway in his suit and tie, I felt like my heart would explode out of my chest.
I beckoned him over and bit my lip on a grin as I faced Nate to give the introductions.
“Jackson, this is my little brother, Nate. Nate, this is my… Jackson.” Jackson’s lips quirked slightly, like he was fighting a smile, and he held his arm out to shake Nate’s hand.
Nate gave Jackson the million dollar smile we all knew and loved, and shook his hand like he was meeting a rock star. I couldn’t help but notice they both blushed. Then ran their hands through their dark hair after their handshake. They were too cute.
“Do you play football?” Nate asked hopefully.
“Not since high school, but I reckon I still have some skills.” I rolled my eyes, Jackson could never admit to not being able to do something. “Do you?”
Nate nodded and bent down to pick up the rucksack beside the counter. “I’ve got practise in an hour, so I’d better get going.”
“Are you any good?” Jackson asked.
“Of course he’s good,” I jumped in. “He’s the top goal scorer this year. He’s an Emerson, we’re always the best.”
Jackson rolled his eyes but grinned over at Nate. “I’d like to see you in action. I haven’t been to a football game in years.”
“We’ve got a game this Sunday coming, if you’re interested. I mean, you don’t have to. I wouldn’t want to…”
“We’ll be there.” Jackson looked to me for confirmation.
“Of course we will. We wouldn’t miss it for the world.”
I hopped off the stool and went over to give Nate a massive hug.
“I’ve missed you, little bro. I won’t leave it so long next time, okay? You’re gonna get tired of me cheering from the side lines at your games from now on, little dude.”
“You couldn’t be any louder than Dad.” Nate screwed his face up at a memory he was obviously trying to forget. “
He almost punched the ref last week when I was fouled. Dad’s crazy.”