“I thought you wanted to see me later?” I laughed, taking the flowers. They smelt heavenly, as did he.
“This is later.” He shrugged and stepped past me into the hallway, giving me a peck on the cheek as he did.
I closed the door, struggling to keep the grin off my face. “I need to put these in some water. Do you want something to drink?”
He smirked and started walking down the hallway, not waiting for me to lead him.
“Are your parents here?” he asked, craning his neck to look through each doorway he passed. I’m pretty sure he already knew the answer to that question, seeing as I’d let him in. After his last encounter with my dad, I’d figured it was best to keep those two parts of my world separate if I wanted an easy life.
“No. Dad’s working and Mum’s getting her Botox topped up. Is Coke okay? Or do you want something else?”
“I’ll take the Coke for now,” he said in a raspy voice. “And then the something else… As long as it isn’t a plate of fucking cookies.”
Fireworks. That’s what I felt. Pure fireworks going off inside me at the way he was looking at me. I had an overwhelming urge to drop the peonies on the floor and jump on him. Ryan Hardy was in my house and he wanted something else. Knowing that did something to me. I was a little nervous, maybe scared, but definitely turned on. I shuffled around in the doorway, not knowing what to do with myself.
“There’s a card in the flowers.” He nodded to the bouquet in my hands as he sat down on the sofa and grabbed the remote to turn on the T.V.
I balanced them in the crook of my arm and took the little white envelope out from the top. My hands were shaking so much, I must’ve looked like such loser. Inside was a little card with an address on and a smiley face. I frowned, having absolutely no clue what this was about. I’d expected poetry or at least a cheeky comment, not a random address with an emoji drawn at the bottom.
“It’s the next party,” he said as he flicked through the channels. “I didn’t want you getting some generic message this time. You get the V.I.P. treatment.”
“Wow. I’m honoured. This isn’t the chapel though. Where is it this time?” I’d have died a little inside if they’d have gone ahead and used that stunning little sanctuary to get crapped all over by half the town.
“Old furniture factory. Finn’s there now making a start on his latest masterpiece. It’s gonna be a bitch to clean it up and get it ready, but we’ll do it. We always do.” He settled back into the sofa as the theme tune for Top Gear played out.
“I can’t wait to see it.” I sighed and went to head to the kitchen but stopped and turned back round. I was all over the damn place today.
“What’s up?” he asked, muting the T.V.
“I tried to find a toxicology report, but there’s nothing. Mum said Dad shredded everything linked to the accident after the inquest. She said he was too heartbroken, he needed it all gone. I’m sorry.” I felt the shift in atmosphere. Ryan had pinned his hopes on me and I’d come up short. Would he change his mind about us if he didn’t think I was useful anymore? Was that what this was? A way to get to my father? I felt a sharp pain in my chest and I winced. I didn’t want to be the pawn in any of his games.
He stood from the sofa, but I held my hand up. “I’m okay. Really.”
He didn’t look convinced and came to stand in front of me, putting both of his hands either side of my face so I’d have no choice but to look him in the eyes.
“You don’t have to be strong with me, Em. I’m here for you.”
I sighed, feeling myself get lost in those sympathetic green eyes of his. The depth of emotion I could see there made me soften and I felt myself leaning into him.
“Honestly, it’s fine. Bringing up Danny, asking about the accident, it helped. Me and Mum spoke about him, I mean really talked about him for the first time in months. I think it helped us both. We argued, got mad, cried. Everything we should’ve done months ago. I’m not saying we’re running for mother and daughter of the year, there’s still a long way to go, but last night was a start.” He smiled and placed a soft, gentle kiss on my forehead. “Bet you didn’t know your snooping around would bring me and my mum closer together.”
“Nice to know I’m good for something.” The look he gave me made my stomach twist with expectation at what else he was good at. This boy was turning me into a hormonal mess. If I didn’t move soon I’d be a pool of desire melted at his feet.
“I’m sure you’re good for other things too.” I tried to sound sexy in a nonchalant way, but my breathy voice gave me away.
“Yeah? Like what?” He leaned closer to me now and the tension that was building up inside me reached fever pitch.
“I don’t know. But when I find out, I’ll let you know.” I really needed to up my seduction game. The words coming out of my mouth sounded more like a brush-off than a come-on. My heart screamed at me to get on my damn tiptoes and kiss the hell out of him, while my head told me to play it cool, be more guarded. I chose me, right? Jesus, that felt like a lifetime ago, when Nurse Constance played cupid on acid. And I’d thought I was so strong, making it all about me. But now, standing in front of Ryan, I realised that strong was taking a chance on something that scared you half to death. Taking the leap into the unknown to see where it could lead. I might be heading for a whole lot of heartbreak where Ryan was concerned, but on the other hand, it could be the best thing to ever happen to me. He could be the best thing to happen to me. If I didn’t take a chance I’d never know.
I remembered my mum once telling me, all those years ago before things turned sour, that it’s the little things in life we should treasure. “Don’t sweat the big stuff,” she’d said. “It’s the little things in life that count. Those moments in time that are as fleeting as a but
terfly. Beautiful, but gone so soon.” I knew what she meant now.
A memory was worth more than any possession and I wanted to create memories with Ryan. No matter how long this lasted. I wanted to be strong and let myself see where this could go.
I backed away slowly, holding up the flowers to indicate that I was taking them to put them in some water. Ryan didn’t move, just pierced me with his seductive stare, making it harder for me to turn away from him, but I did, and I floated down the hallway, ready to dump the flowers into the first vase of water I could lay my hands on, grab the drinks and get back to him.
When I walked back into the living room a minute later, Ryan was gone. My heart dropped, thinking he’d given up on me and bailed, then I tried to recall hearing the door shut. I hadn’t. Where the hell was he?