Mr and Mrs (Promises 1)
Page 22
“You’d never hurt me,” I counter, knowing he’d never lay a hand on me. Hell, I’d just smacked him and he took it.
“I don’t know about that. I’d really like to spank your ass right now, then bend you over that couch and fuck the shit out of you just to show you that you’re the only woman I’ve ever fucked in this office. Ever.”
It’s like every emotion I’m feeling goes straight to my core. Phillip has never talked to me like that. But he’s been doing a lot of things differently this past week. He hasn’t slept with me since I’ve been back. It’s been over four months, a record for us. We barely went twenty-four hours without making love before I ran. Even when he worked late, he’d crawl into bed and climb right on top of me.
“I’m okay with that.” I start to slip off my dress. Wanting that. Wanting us skin on skin. To let his warmth fill me up. Ease this ache.
“Don’t,” he growls, stopping me. “First we’re going to clear up some things.”
I drop my hand and shake my head.
“You thought I was having an affair before you even came here that night?” he asks, studying me, recalling my words to him. I had, but I’d discounted those thoughts. I’d come here to tell him how I’d been feeling for those past few months.
“I…” God, I feel terrible. How could I have let this get this far? “You’d started coming home later and later. I felt like there were secrets. Then the way she’d treat me,” I nod towards the door, out to where Cary’s desk sits, “when I called or stopped by. It pissed me off. Then Cindy said I was crazy, and to come and talk to you. So I did, but when I got here and saw her naked, I…”
“Your dad,” he finishes for me. I was going to say I freaked out and ran, but yeah, a big part of that was my dad. Phillip went right to the root of it. I drop my head, looking at my feet, feeling shame that I let that get between us.
Then Phillip is picking me up, placing me in his lap as he sits down on the couch.
“This isn’t your fault, sweet Molly.” God, I love when he calls me that. I look up into his dark blue eyes that are all soft and sweet now. His big hands cup my face. “I should have known what you’d think, but I was too worried about myself. What I might do to you. You’re so young, and it’s almost like I forget that in some areas but not in others.”
His thumb brushes my lips and I can’t stop my tongue from peeking out, trying to get a taste of him, making a half smile pull at his lips.
“I don’t get it,” I admit.
“I should have known you were going to think that. Hell, we’d laid in bed many nights, you telling me about how he was and how you’d never want a family like that. That it messed with your mom, and I knew that shit messed with you, too. Even he messed with you. I see it. His little side jabs, like you were too young to participate in some conversations. Always going on about how you had to get a silly art degree. It’s why I didn’t care when I moved you away from him to another city. It’s also why I gave him a piece of my mind that very night after we said ‘I do.’”
I stare at him. I shouldn’t be surprised he’d say something to my father, but I guess I never thought he noticed the things my dad did. All my experiences had been shaped and influenced by my insecurities. Never had Phillip treated me like I was less than.
“You’re young and I knew that. I should have taken better care of you.”
“You do. I was silly. I should have stayed and fought. I should have—”
“Fought for a husband who even let an idea like that pop into your head? Fight for a husband who told you he’d give you one thing but hadn’t followed through?”
“We would have gotten there,” I tell him, because we would have. I know that now. He was letting go of the reins at work. Moving us out of the city. He’s been talking about it all week.
“We would have—we are,” he corrects. “But all this goes back to my insecurities, too. I was afraid you wouldn’t love me if you knew.”
I feel my eyebrows pull together, not understanding what he means.
“Whatever it is, we’ll get through it.” I try to reassure him. I don’t want these little doubts between us anymore either. Maybe it was a product of my age and of rushing down the aisle so hastily. It didn’t matter. It still got us here, no matter the path. It got me where I wanted to be: in his lap, our baby in my belly cradled between us.
“I know we will because it’s too late. I fought it too long and now I can’t hold back.”
I try and wiggle a little closer to him while straddling his lap. My baby bump rubs up against his hard stomach. His hands drop from my face, going to my thighs where my dress ends. Then they slide just a little underneath, the tips of his fingers disappearing under my dress.
“I’ve been trying to hold back with you. Yeah, I was working a lot to get things wrapped up, but I was also doing it because I kept sinking deeper and deeper into you. My every thought began and ended with you. I wanted you by my side always. I was afraid I was going to crush you with my need.”
“I happen to like your need, if it’s anything like what you’ve shown me this past week,” I reply, eating up the look he has on his face. So much hunger and passion. It’s intense and I love it. I want that from him as deeply as he wants me.