‘Yes, you do. Eloise and I sang it to you in your bath,’ Frederick said from the doorway, and started to hum.
The tune ricocheted around his brain...evoked a crystal-clear memory. Himself in the bath, surrounded by bubbles, a rubber duck in each hand, splashing in time as his mother and Frederick sang.
‘“Five little ducks went swimming one day...”’
Soon he and Frederick were singing and Amil was splashing and moving the ducks around the bath. Finally Frederick called a halt, helped Amil out of the bath, wrapped him in a fluffy towel and carried him into the lounge.
‘Help yourself to a drink whilst I put Amil to bed.’
‘Uncle Stefan. Please read my book?’
Frederick hesitated, then glanced at Stefan with a rueful smile. ‘Do you mind?’
‘Not at all.’
And he meant it. So he read his nephew a book featuring a variety of farmyard animals and felt his heart tug again.
Later, when Amil was in bed, Frederick poured two glasses of deep red wine and heated up a casserole. He sat down opposite Stefan in the spacious kitchen as the scent of herbs filled the air. ‘Can we talk?’
‘Sure.’ Though wariness touched him.
‘I know the deal you made with Marcus. Support me and get your lands back. I went along with it because I knew you wouldn’t accept the lands otherwise. But I have always been happy to restore them; they are yours by right. I want you to know that.’
Stefan shook his head. ‘I don’t work like that. Our father took my rights and my lands away—that was his right. I would like them back, but I have no wish to be beholden.’
‘We’re brothers. You wouldn’t be beholden. It wouldn’t give me any power over you. That’s what you’re worried about, isn’t it? Giving anyone power over you. Me? Holly?’
Stefan froze. ‘Holly has nothing to do with this.’
‘Yes, she does. You made a deal with her too—a marriage deal. And now I think you care about her. Maybe even love her.’
‘Of course I don’t. I don’t do love.’ Inside him something twisted, turned, unlocked with a creak, opening a floodgate of panic.
His brother smiled. ‘Famous last words, little brother. Sometimes love doesn’t give you a choice.’
‘There is always a choice.’ And right now he chose to cut himself loose before it was too late to uproot love. Love that had already coiled around his heart, inserting insidious tendrils of weakness.
Whoa... Love? He loved Holly...? Loved her?
Frederick leant forward, his blue eyes arresting, his mien serious. ‘This may be none of my business, but you are my brother. We shared a childhood...we shared an upbringing. I cared about your mother and I cared about you. But when Eloise left, when you still got to see her and I didn’t, I was angry and I blamed you. Instead of becoming a better brother I switched off, insulated myself from all emotions and feelings, allowed our father to mess with my head. Like I know he messed with yours. I owe you an apology, Stefan; I didn’t step up when I should have.’
Stefan could feel emotions long-buried begin to surface. The hurt he’d felt at losing Frederick’s affection...the guilt of his belief that he’d deserved to lose it...their father’s relentless pitting of brother against brother. But through it all he hadn’t thought about how Frederick felt, how he was affected.
‘Maybe it’s time to put it behind us.’
He saw an image of Holly’s face, heard an echo of her voice. ‘If you can let go of the past then you can have a future.’
‘Go forward from here.’
‘I’d like that.’ Frederick took a breath. ‘But there’s something else I’d like to say. Our father messed with my head so much I didn’t believe that I could be a good husband or father. Sunita and Amil showed me that I can—maybe Holly can show you the same. Don’t let our father mess with your head from beyond the grave. If you love her, go for it—I promise you it will be worth it.’
Frederick paused and leant over and ruffled Stefan’s hair. The gesture was ridiculously familiar.
‘Lecture over, little bro, but if you need anything then let me know.’
Stefan stood up, unsure of what to say. He loved Holly—and now he had a choice as to what to do about it.
* * *