“Inside joke,” Laney snorts, gauging me. “It’s from a movie.”
“Blasphemy! It’s not just a movie, it’s the southern woman’s bible!” Devin proclaims, raising her beer to toast Laney.
“Amen.”
They both drink as the music changes, morphing into a steady thrum of bass and Devin’s eyes widen. “Oh my God, we need to dance, now, right now.”
“Because a minute from now is too late?” I ask, egging her on.
“Such a smart ass,” Laney grins at me.
“I love it!” Devin proclaims before turning to Laney. “I like him so much.”
“You love everyone right now, Devil. They don’t call it Jesus’s Juice for nothing.”
Devin facepalms her and grins at me. “She said you were adorable,” her head wobbles on her neck as she begins to slide down the side of her chair. “And I must agree.”
The foot-long dick I just gained by word of mouth shrivels up as I avoid Laney’s eyes while she hoists Devin back up in her chair, sitting her upright and snatching her beer.
This is most definitely not a date, not if the word ‘adorable’ was used when she described me.
Adorable translation—my penis will never enter her vagina. But she will use me at her leisure, like a stuffed animal. I’ll be there for comfort on long, lonely nights; and she will drag my ass around by the arm until I’m filthy, my limbs are ripping apart at the seams from neglect, and my insides are coming out.
I’ve most definitely been friend-zoned, or in my case, Teddy’d.
“I meant that in a good way,” Laney explains after weighing my expression. I chew it over for a second.
“You know, I thought the same thing about you when I first saw you.” It’s the truth. I did think she was adorable. And I’d thought the same tonight when I saw her. It’s just far more flattering on her side of things. For me, it’s the kiss of fucking death.
For the next half hour, I watch as Laney stomps on the foot of any guy who gets within a few inches of either of them. I’m mildly entertained but feel like I’m a third wheel. While I watch, I try so hard not to memorize her movements, but it’s proving impossible. I’m so in tune with the way she works herself that I have to adjust my junk twice. She is far more than adorable, but I refuse to let myself fixate.
Laney is the first to make it back to the table, lifting her hair to wave a hand beneath the sweaty strands. “Whew, hot.”
It’s on the tip of my tongue to agree, but that’s flirting. And I shouldn’t be flirting, because I’m adorable.
Fuck.
It occurs to me then, that on some level I had hoped it was a date.
She looks over to me and thanks me for the water I gathered while they were grinding on air. “I only came here because she loves it. She doesn’t get out much. I got over this place after a few semesters at Grand.”
“Is she a student?”
“Part-time at Junior, her dad owns Hardin Sports. She works at the headquarters here.”
“Ah.”
“So, if you need a discount on balls, I’m your gal.”
“Thanks.”
“Anytime.” More silence ensues as we both observe our surroundings. I can feel her eyes on me. “You talked a whole lot more in the yard, and at the grocery store,” she sips at her water.
“I gave you a lot to work with.”
She lifts her palm, moving it in a circle as she speaks. “And now you’re being all mysterious.”
I shrug. “No good can come from showing your full hand all at once.”