More tears fell as I let the emotion overwhelm me, sobbing into my hands. “I want so much to touch you now, Nina, but I can’t.” I nodded into my hands.
“That day at the club, I got in touch with Cedric and told him everything. I didn’t want you near it. It was my mess to clean. He worked day and night to find the man responsible while keeping you safe. I knew Aiden couldn’t touch you. That’s all it’s ever been about, keeping you away. I was so fucking selfish to start this.” He ran his hands through his hair.
We both stayed silent, so many questions swirling through my head.
I asked none. Finally, Devin spoke with gravel in his voice. “I owed you the truth, and now you have it. You would have gotten it much sooner, but I knew you needed time. I’d already put you through so much.” I looked up as his face fell. “I love you. I’ll always love you, Nina. But I never deserved you. Your love saved me, though, in that I can throw it all away without regret now.”
My voice was a whisper. “What are you going to do?”
“Tell the fucking truth.”
Cedric opened the car door, and I jumped at the intrusion.
“Hospital,” Devin said quickly.
I looked over his damaged shoulder and saw the bottom of his sleeve was soaked with blood. He looked up at me with a small smile. “I took a bullet for you. Let’s see the next guy top that.”
My chest cracked wide open as I looked him over. I reached my hand back to grab his, and he gripped mine loosely. “I’ll live,” he said, assuring me.
“I won’t.”
He stared at me for a long moment before looking back out the window. “You will.”
It was a sad statement, but a final one as he let go of my hand. Cedric sped down the highway and minutes later we were at the hospital. Devin got out and thanked Cedric then turned to look at me.
“I won’t bother you again, Nina.” He turned and walked through the sliding doors before I had a chance to reply.
Tears multiplied by the thousands as I watched the road pass by me in a blur. I let go of a month’s worth of tears, pent up frustration, and now grieved the truth. Cedric practically carried me upstairs and stayed with me as I crawled into bed. It didn’t take long for the darkness to take me.
“There are two tragedies in life. One is to lose your heart’s desire. The other is to gain it.”
? George Bernard Shaw
§§
“So fucking beautiful, Nina. Don’t move.”
“Devin, wait. I’m a mess!”
He lifted his phone and took a picture as I flashed a quick smile. I was sitting in his bed with his sheet wrapped around me, my hair a mess and my skin sticky from hours of sex. Even a hot mess, he’d made me feel beautiful. I looked across at him as he smiled at his picture of me.
“I love you, Devin.” He froze in place, holding his phone as I repeated it. “I love you. I’ll take your damn friendship and sex, but that’s how I feel.”
I didn’t let him say anything as I pulled myself into his lap. I refused to meet his eyes as I kissed him feverishly. It felt amazing to let the words out after feeling that way for so long. I didn’t look at him as I busied myself, latching my lips to his perfectly toned chest. He didn’t say a word as he ran his fingers through my hair, softly tugging at the ends, prompting me gently to look up at him. I kissed his chest, ignoring the soft pull as he continued to ask me for my eyes. His touch was so gentle, I cursed the burn in my throat that led to the stinging of fresh tears.
I finally braved a look at him, letting my eyes drift from his sculpted chest to his Adam’s apple, then his smiling lips. I returned his smile before I reached his eyes. “I’m not sorry I fell for you,” I said, finally lifting my gaze to his. His eyes were filled with emotion as well. It looked like confusion and happiness. I allowed myself to be satisfied with it.
“So, I was changing the subject,” I said, gripping his hard cock. He was gloriously naked along with me, and I traced every inch of his body with my greedy fingertips.
His smile turned wicked as he continued to stroke my hair, my nipples peaking underneath the sheet still covering me.
“Nina—”
“Yes?” I cut him off, stroking him hard, the way he liked. Whatever excuse he had for not returning my affections, I didn’t want to hear it. I’d said what I’d wanted to say. I wouldn’t ask him for more than he told me he could give. I took his lips, sucking greedily, and began to rub my pussy along his stiff cock.
I wrapped my arms around his neck and tilted my head back, getting lost in my own seduction as my orgasm built from the friction of simply grinding myself along his length. He captured my neck in his mouth, moving his tongue up and down its contours, and along my collarbone as I arched my back, moving at a faster pace. He still wasn’t inside of me, and it amazed me he didn’t need to be to drive me to the edge.
“Oh, God, it feels so good,” I panted, just on the brink. My whole body shivered in anticipation as Devin, typically full of filthy talk, remained silent. I looked up to him to see a passion so intense that it pushed me over the edge, and I came hard, calling his name.