“I am.”
“Gah. Finally. The Lord answered one of my prayer
s.”
“Yeah, well, don’t get too excited. You know my dating history.”
“I would almost feel sorry for you, but I don’t. Please have sex with them both and make this an epic saga so I can live vicariously through you.”
“Absolutely not,” I snap. “I’m never getting intimate with Troy again. Ever. Are you crazy?”
“Clarissa, he was a kid. He saw your beautiful ass and wanted it. Most guys would lie for a crack at you. You are hot, babe. He didn’t know it would backfire like that. And you said a million times that you both used each other that night.”
“But it did backfire. And if he hadn’t lied—”
“You wouldn’t have Dante.”
“I know.” I swallow the thought. “God, where would I be?”
“I know this. That boy makes you happy. He does. Even if his conception was an accident.”
“So, you’re on Troy’s side?”
“No sides. Not anymore. It’s time you both grew up and did what’s best for your kid. Let old hurts go. Etcetera, etcetera.”
“I am. I think I am. I’m trying, for Dante.”
“Good.” She eyes me, pushing a lock of her long dark hair off her shoulders. “This is about to get fun.”
“Stop. Nothing is going to happen with Troy. He’s still using his penis as a Fun Dip. I’ve watched him walk out two women since he’s moved in. And Brett, well, he’s a damned good kisser, and you know a good kiss is everything for me.”
“Don’t you dare hold back again, I don’t give a shit if I’m in China, which I will be in November.”
“Really?”
“Yep,” she says with a sigh. “And I’m not eating shit there but rice and noodles. They eat dogs, and I’m not going to gamble on mystery meat. No, thanks.” She scrunches her nose. “It will be the best diet I’ve ever been on.”
“Another diet?”
“Clarissa, I haven’t seen my vagina in five years.” A woman walking by our booth gapes at us, grabbing her son and turning him in the opposite direction.
“Sorry,” Parker sputters out apologetically as laughter bursts from me. I shake my head as Parker’s brown eyes come back to mine. “Oops.”
“You are crazy.”
“I’m serious. Our relationship is strained. I would like to get laid again before I turn thirty. China will heal me, I know it.”
I grip her hand across the table. “You’re perfect to me.”
“You have to say that, I know all of your dirty secrets.”
“Shut up.”
When the waitress delivers our ticket, Parker places her card on the table.
“No way.” Most of the time, my pride speaks up and we argue about how she’s wealthy and childless and can afford it, but this time, I slam a twenty on the table and end the fight. “Troy is paying.”
A slow smile covers Parker’s lips as she wipes fake tears from her eyes. “I’m so proud of him.”