After our little riff we’d spent the last few days attached at the hip. If we weren’t locked away in our room we were out doing something together or with the others. She wasn’t quite there yet but she was slowly but surely breaking her way out of her shell. She also had a mouth on her, at least when it came to giving me hell. With everyone else she was the sweet reserved little kitten, when it came to me it was a different story. I guess she’s trying out her claws on me, which is fine. It means she feels safe enough, or trust me enough to let herself go. Whatever the case it was refreshing to see the fire in her finally blazing free. She was becoming more and more of a teenager these days and I’m reminded of the phrase ‘be careful what you wish for’. She’s also spoilt as fuck but I guess that’s to be expected after denying herself for so long.
It’s like she wants to try everything at once and I have no problem making it happen for her.
I don’t watch her so much these days to make sure she’s fine as I do just for the pleasure of it. The more I do to ensure her safety the more I push her to do new things. And a free and relaxed Kadyn is the most beautiful creature I’ve ever known. I got her a bike so that we could go for rides together in the mornings, took her down to the stables to choose a horse to take lessons. I was on a mission to fill her life with as much joy as I could in the time before we had to go off to college and with each new adventure she grew more beautifully amazing in my eyes.
Everything about her is amazing in my biased opinion, a simple thing like the way she brushes her hair back when it gets in the way, or the way she tilts her head when she’s listening to me. She touches me more without provocation now; just little touches that always make my heart beat out of place. I know others can see the changes as well because dad would give me a secret smile and a clap on the shoulder whenever she’s around and her dad is more relaxed and very friendly to a guy who I’m sure he has to know is sleeping with his daughter.
I haven’t seen the ass that attacked her since that day but then again we don’t move in the same circles. I check her phone every once in a while to make sure he’s not trying to contact her because I’m pretty sure she wouldn’t tell me. The first time I did that she lit into me for going through her phone but I just passed mine to her without saying a word. I guess she got the message that she could go through my shit too if she wanted because she grumbled something about Carrie warning her and stormed out of the room. Whatever!
Very rarely do I see her go off into her head these days, at those times I know she’s remembering Bruno but I always find a way to take her mind off of it. I don’t pretend that it’s not her reality but neither do I let her dwell on it too much. And at night when we’re wrapped around each other, when she’s feeling safe and loved, I draw more and more of the poison out of her hoping that by doing that she can finally free herself from it.
“Look at this, looks like your little wild goose chase worked, he’s bought tickets to Russia. Are you fucking kidding me? This guy is fucking relentless.” My mind raced with ideas of how to use this new development. Obviously when he got there he’d realize she wasn’t there and never had been so then what? And how could I use the fact that he was willing to follow her out of the country even with a restraining order against him? “Did you make any progress with the laptop yet?”
“Almost there bro, just a few more levels to go, when’s he leaving the country?”
“In about a week and a half.” Actually watching this guy in action myself had brought home to me why she was so scared of him. The reality is that her living in such close proximity to him had been a danger, one that I only truly begun to understand after my nightly visits into his world. I’ve watched him listening in on her mom’s phone calls and reading her mail and was happy that I hadn’t let her in on what I was doing. That would only have worried her incessantly and fed her fear even more.