“Listen, Shea, if you want out just tell me now…” Christian started but Shea cut him off.
“For Christ’s sake, Chris, I don’t want out. Will you please stop second guessing me?” said Shea, letting out an irritated sigh as he fixed their coffees with cream and sugar.
“I’m sorry, I’m just finding this difficult to wrap my mind around,” Christian muttered and sank down into his normal chair at the head of the table.
“Stop thinking so much about it. We’re pretty much just adding more affection and sex to our friendship. You’re making this a bigger deal than it is,” Shea said and set Christian’s coffee down in front of him.
Christian gave him an incredulous look. “This is a big deal! You’re not gay!”
“What the fuck did I tell you last night? I am now, so shut the hell up and just accept it.”
“Jesus Christ, Shea, you can’t just turn gay overnight!” Christian argued.
“Watch me!” Shea countered.
He was serious about this. He was not going to lose his best friend and only family he had because he wasn’t gay. Christian was in love with him, and he would be damned if he were going to let him walk away without at least trying to give Christian what he deserved. Christian wanted to be with him, and he would do that for him and only for him. If any other man came to Shea and told him that they were in love with him, he probably would have run away screaming, but this was Christian.
Shea would be lying if there hadn’t been moments in their friendship when he wondered what it would be like to be more than friends with Christian, especially after Christian came out to him. So he really wasn’t doing something that he hadn’t already thought about a time or two before.
“Fine, whatever,” Christian scoffed before sipping his coffee.
Shea walked over to the table and set his mug down before moving to stand behind Christian. He placed his hands on Christian’s shoulders and started to knead them. The tension in them was incredible. He had no idea how Christian dealt with his shoulders being this tight all of the time.
“Dude, you need to relax,” Shea murmured.
“You don’t understand, Shea. You have no idea how long I’ve wanted this with you, and then out of nowhere, all of my dreams are coming true. I’m just having a hard time thinking this is real.”
Shea yanked Christian’s chair out from the table to give himself room to straddle Christian’s lap. Christian stared up at him with wide eyes as Shea threw his leg over and sat down on his lap, facing him. Christian swallowed hard as Shea leaned in close and whispered, “How’s this for real?” before kissing Christian passionately.
Christian sucked in a sharp breath through his nose and clutched fistfuls of the front of Shea’s shirt. Shea found that there wasn’t much difference between kissing a guy or a girl; a girl’s lips might be a bit softer, and they usually weren’t as aggressive or had stubble on their faces, but other than that, it was the same. However, Shea couldn’t say that it was the same because of the feelings he was experiencing. When he kissed Tara, the girl he had been seeing, he felt nothing compared kissing Christian. It was crazy the way his mind fogged and his heart fluttered. No woman has ever done that to him.
Shea shoved his hands into Christian’s silky hair and tilted his head so that he could kiss him deeper. Christian moaned, his hands snaking around to Shea’s ass, where he grabbed it and pulled Shea closer. Shea could feel Christian’s erection against his own. Whoa! He hadn’t even realized that he was hard! He was just so into the kiss, he hadn’t noticed. Shea tore his mouth away from Christian’s. They sat there panting, their eyes locked on each other.
“Wow, that was hot,” Shea rasped.
“I’d have to agree.” Christian breathed.
“Was that real enough for you?” asked Shea, eyebrow cocked in question.
“Yes.”
“Good, I’m your boyfriend now, Chris, don’t forget it,” said Shea, giving Christian a pointed look.
Christian smiled softly. “Alright.”
Christian kept his eyes on Shea as he got up off his lap. He didn’t want Shea to go, but he didn’t want to scare him away either by trying to do more than kiss. Christian wasn’t exactly convinced that Shea was going to be able to do more than that. He had said last night that being with another guy kind of freaked him out, so Christian wasn’t going to get his hopes up about this relationship. He had a feeling he was in for a world of heartache.
Shea sat down in the chair to Christian’s left and took a sip of his coffee. He started talking, but Christian wasn’t fully listening. He was watching Shea’s full lips and imagining them wrapped around... Good Lord, it has been way too long since he’s had sex. He was dying to get Shea in bed; he has been fantasizing about it for over two years now. The things he wanted to do to this man... shit, sometimes Christian scared himself just thinking about it.