Stopping him from wheeling forward, I bend down and press my lips to his. Sparks ignite inside me as I feel his hands fumble in my hair. I press my palms against his cheeks, pushing him further inside my mouth. As soon as he starts to pull me on top of him, I step out of his grasp.
Relaxing my body and concentrating on evening out my breathing, we both calm down from our surges of lust. I don’t know why I keep pushing back from these intimate moments. It’s not like I don’t want him, because I do—really do, to the point where I’ve had to resort to cold showers and the use of two fingers to relieve the tension.
He notices my hesitation and passes me, opening the sliding door in his room. The cool winter air blows inside as I look up into the drab sky. “I can’t believe it’s so dark already. What time is it?”
Roman glances at his watch. “Seven thirty. Food will be ready in ten minutes. Come outside for a sec.”
He takes my hand and leads me out onto the balcony. There’s a raised edge where the doorframe slides, so he stands up and leans against it, as he can’t wheel out. Holding my hand he tells me to look up at the stars.
Lifting my head, I’m surprised at how many stars are out tonight. Usually in the city, I can hardly see anything in the sky. With the city lights and the unfortunately rather polluted air, the stars are always dim. I’m only able to see the stars outside of the city, for instance in Connecticut or at Raya and Duke’s house in Long Island. He points toward the biggest shining star and I answer, “You mean the North Star?”
He nods. “Yeah, I know it’s the North Star but I always see it as my parents looking down on me because no matter where I am, anytime I look up, that star is always there, shining bright in the dark sky.”
Listening to him speak, I imagine his parents up there, looking down at us.
“I’ve always thought that since I was a kid. Every time I felt sad or lonely, I climbed up to the roof and stared out. That star was the only one that shined in the vast blanket of darkness. I knew it was them, my parents. Some days, I’d step outside and I’d talk to them, telling them how my day was at school and how Aunt Maggie and Uncle Vinny were doing. I know it probably sounds silly, but in a way, the star kept me going. Knowing that my parents were listening and watching over me made it all just a little bit easier to bear.”
A small tear escapes my eye as he tells me stories of his childhood. I could have never prepared myself for listening to such heartbreak and pain; how he managed to overcome it all completely blows me away. The cold air blows through my hair, causing my body to shiver. He wraps his arms around me, pulling me into his chest. Our bodies embrace one another, heating each other up right from the core.
We stand outside for a few more minutes until a beep from the oven chimes. He kisses my cheek as he lets go of me, sits back in his chair, and slides the door shut behind me. Dinner awaits us and he instructs me to take a seat while he serves. Leaning over to see what he’s serving, my stomach growls in anticipation. Licking my lips, I can only imagine how good it will taste.
******
Washing my hands in the bathroom, I check my makeup in the reflection. Still looking well kept, I shut the water off and dry my hands. I hear Roman cleaning up the kitchen so I rush out to help him. “Here, let me help please.”
Standing against the counter, he steps aside, allowing me to assist. “Okay.”
I hand him a clean dish as he stacks it away in the cabinet. “Dinner was amazing. I loved it. Maggie taught you well.”
“Actually Uncle Vinny taught me that recipe.”
My jaw drops. “Really? Wow, I never saw him as a cook.”
He chuckles at my astonishment. “Yeah, he has hidden talents.”
Cleaning up the rest of the dishes, I wipe down his counter, ensuring everything is back to normal.
He points toward the fridge. “Can you pass me the bowl in the fridge? You can’t miss it.”
“Okay.” Opening the fridge, I peek inside and see a white mixing bowl that’s filled with chocolate. I take it out and show him. “This one right?”
He nods. “Yup, that’s it. Place it on the counter and I’ll get the rest of the ingredients.”
Puzzled, I raise my brow. “Ingredients? What are we making?”
He grabs the flour and a few other ingredients, placing them on the counter. He steps toward me, kissing my lips before he answers. “Only your favorite thing in the whole world.”
My eyes pop as my face lights with excitement. “We’re going to make éclairs?”
His finger presses against my lips as he shushes me. He whispers, “Don’t tell Maggie.”
Fifteen minutes later, a set of chocolate éclairs bake in the oven. Roman sets the timer and says it’ll take about thirty minutes for them to rise. Licking the chocolate off my fingers, I turn on the kitchen faucet to wash my hands. I see Roman get a rag out to wipe the counter but as he stretches across the flour knocks over and spills out.
Quickly standing the bag right side up before any more spills out he cusses, “Shit.”
Laughing at his clumsiness, I grab a rag to clean it up. “It’s okay. Shit happens. The flour could have gotten all over your clothes instead. Be happy it’s only on the counter.”
He stares at me for a quick second as a huge smile curves his lips. Curious at what he’s thinking, I ask, “What are you up to?”