Original Sin

‘Do you want to come to my cottage?’ said Sean. ‘It’s away from the main drag, by the beach.’

She nodded and rushed out of the hotel.

‘I’m sorry, you must think I’m stupid,’ she said when they were safely away from the building.

Sean shrugged. ‘No. I think you’ve just seen something that’s upset you or bothered you.’

They walked silently towards a row of four cottages by the shore.

‘Thanks,’ she said finally, walking into the living space. Sean threw his keycard on the side and picked up the telephone.

‘I asked for the minibar to be cleared before I came so I’ll have to order you something from the hotel.’

‘I thought you were drinking cocktails earlier?’

‘Cream and pineapple. Totally nonalcoholic but very sickly. I wouldn’t recommend it. ‘

Tess went outside and sat on a lounger by the small pool, shining like a sheet of sparkling tourmaline, while Sean made the call to room service. He walked out and sat next to Tess. ‘Am I allowed to ask what happened back there?’

Tess looked up, grateful that the cool Pacific breeze was cooling her red cheeks.

‘I saw my mother’s husband,’ she said simply.

‘Which isn’t your father … ?’ he said, brows creasing.

‘My dad’s dead. My mother remarried this guy, Anthony, who was one of my dad’s friends. That’s who I saw in the lobby.’

‘So why did you want to avoid him?’

‘Because it probably means my mother is here.’

‘And you don’t want to see her?’ he said, looking increasingly baffled.

Tess shook her head, looking down at the pool. ‘I haven’t spoken to her in twelve years.’

She saw the confusion on his face. Total estrangement from a parent was an alien concept to most people, especially to someone like Sean, brought up in the tightly knit Asgill clan, where life and business overlapped and every part of your life was planned, watched, and discussed. Tess sighed.

‘My mum and dad were never a match made in heaven,’ she began. ‘I think she always felt that she hadn’t fulfilled her potential with him. My dad, on the other hand, was crazy about her. You know some women have that effect on men.’

Sean nodded.

‘So my dad bought a pub in Suffolk – Constable country, a gorgeous place. We moved up there from North London.’

She smiled to herself. She could appreciate the county’s beauty now, but back then as a teenager, she’d been as negative about it as her mother. Back in Edgware, Tess was cool and popular, going to gigs in London, getting served in the local pubs. At the Suffolk sixth–form college, suddenly she was no one, an outsider surrounded by people who had known each other since primary school. These people thought she was showing off when she mentioned that she’d been to the Astoria or Hammersmith Apollo. London to them was somehow corrupt and unsavoury, and Tess was tarred with the same brush. Still, she made every attempt she could to fit in because she knew her father had made the move to save their family, which was why she had taken refuge at the college newspaper, where her own back–story wasn’t important as long as she could deliver her copy on time.

The bell to the cottage rang and Sean got up and returned with two bottles of beer on a tray.

‘I didn’t think one was enough,’ he smiled.

Tess took a long, grateful swallow before continuing. ‘My mum hated Suffolk. Instead of saving the marriage, it drove them further apart. She would go and spend half the week in London visiting friends while dad would be putting in fifteen–hour days in the pub. He still stuck by her, though,’ said Tess, shaking her head in wonder. ‘But it wasn’t enough, and finally she walked out on us. Turns out

she’d been having an affair with Anthony, one of dad’s so–called friends, and she moved back to London to be with him. I stayed with Dad, of course. I’d just finished my A–levels and I had a place to do English at Bristol University, but I deferred it to help Dad in the pub. Dad had overstretched himself to buy it in the first place and he couldn’t cope alone. He tried, God knows he tried, but two weeks before Christmas, the pub got repossessed. My dad died of a heart attack a month later.’

It had been a long time since Tess had told that story, and all the years in between had not made it any easier. She could still remember vividly the day they moved from the pub into a rented flat in the village, and she could still hear the sympathetic whispers of the locals. But most of all, burned indelibly into her mind, was the memory of finding her father dead, slumped on the gaudy living–room carpet when she had returned from a supermarket run one evening. Twelve years hadn’t been able to wipe away that. At night she could sometimes hear the ambulance, the blue light flashing through the window and casting a ghoulish glow around the room. To this day she did not know what had caused his heart to give up. A genetic weakness, his expanding waistline – working in a pub serving ‘good solid English food’ certainly hadn’t helped – or perhaps it really was a broken heart, having lost his wife, his business, and his dream in the space of a few weeks.

‘I’m so sorry,’ said Sean, awkwardly putting a hand on her shoulder.

‘So I never got to uni,’ said Tess with a small smile. ‘You can probably tell.’ For a second she thought of Dom’s friends talking about their time at Oxford or Durham and looking down on Tess with her A–levels and on–the–job experience.