‘And a better life for you,’ said Tess, unable to stop herself.
Paula’s face twisted into a scowl. ‘How dare you sit there and judge me?’ she spat bitterly. ‘You have no idea what I had to go through, how I felt. Do you have the slightest idea what it’s like looking after a child that can’t even hold its head up? Who will never be able to run or read or even talk? Of course not, you haven’t got a clue.’
‘Violet’s not just a child,’ said Tess defensively. ‘She’s your child.’
‘Yes, she is,’ said Paula. She had no desire to justify her actions to Tess Garrett, but telling her the story had actually reassured Paula that she had done the right thing.
‘Violet is my child, and I did what I thought was best for her.’
The two women glared at each other. Finally Tess looked away and her expression softened.
‘Do you think about her?’
Paula was silent. Thick gulps caught in her throat and then she couldn’t hold back the tide of sadness, anger, and frustration any longer. She covered her face and sobbed, her shoulders shuddering, tears running between her fingers. When she had recovered a little, she accepted the tissue Tess passed to her and wiped her face.
‘It was a open adoption because I thought that way I could still hear what Violet was doing,’ said Paula. ‘Maybe one day see her again. But when I met William, I knew that could never happen.’
‘Why not?’
‘For all their smiles, manners, and smart clothes, society people are vicious,’ she whispered. ‘The WASP ideal is perfection. Comply or die.’
‘Well then, we have a problem,’ said Tess. ‘This man Ted Kressler wants two hundred thousand dollars to keep quiet.’
Paula felt icy cold.
‘Have you told Meredith?’
Tess shook her head.
‘Not yet. I thought you might like to tell her before me.’
Paula was shaking her head and her hands were trembling. ‘Can’t you make it go away?’ Her voice rose with desperation. ‘I thought that’s what we were paying you to do.’
Tess folded her top lip over her bottom one. ‘The easiest thing to do is run away or bury it as deep as you can, but in my experience it’s not always the best thing to do.’
‘Let me find the money,’ said Paula quickly. ‘It might take a couple of days … ’
‘No Paula,’ said Tess firmly. ‘You have got to tell Meredith. We have to deal with this. For one thing, blackmailers are rarely satisfied with one pay–off and, even if we could shut Kressler up, secrets like this have a habit of getting out.’
Tess examined Paula’s face. ‘Does William know?’
‘Of course he doesn’t know,’ she moaned, feeling the tears begin to fall again. She closed her eyes, remembering the one moment she had almost told William. It had been six months into their relationship and Paula had begun to realize that, as well as being rich and halfway good looking, William Asgill was a decent man, a rarity in such circles. She and William had been sitting under a tree with a picnic, when he had told her that he loved her. It had been the first time he had said it and, looking into his eyes, Paula knew that he meant it. She knew in that moment that she could tell him anything and it wouldn’t change how he felt about her. But still she couldn’t tell him because she wanted to be part of his safe, perfect world. She’d worked so damn hard to get to that place, to become a successful model with a rich, clever guy doting on her. She couldn’t let anything screw that up. Most of all, she didn’t want to give his bitch of a mother the opportunity to say, ‘I told you so. A gold–digger with a dirty secret.’
Paula shook her head again. ‘He doesn’t know and the moment has passed to tell him,’ said Paula softly. ‘So I’ve just tried to forget about it, about her. I try to pretend that was a part of my life that never happened.’
She looked up as Tess picked up her mobile phone.
‘What are you doing?’ said Paula, panic in her voice.
‘Arranging a meeting with Meredith,’ said Tess. ‘Then we need to go to Charleston and meet Ted Kressler. We should fly down tomorrow.’
‘I can’t fly anywhere tomorrow,’ said Paula, her eyes wide. ‘I have people coming. Everything is arranged, it’s important.’
‘And this is important,’ said Tess sternly. ‘We need to sort this all out and we can’t leave it another day.’
CHAPTER FIFTY–ONE
In the weeks following the Portico launch, Charles Devine had phoned Tess at the Asgill offices at least half a dozen times. Convinced he was angling for a wedding invitation, she successfully managed to field his calls. But when a handwritten dove–grey Mrs John L. Strong notelet arrived requesting her company for afternoon tea, Tess knew the only way to put a stop to it all was to take him up on his invitation and, secretly, Tess was looking forward to it. She was desperate to escape the Asgill universe, which was becoming increasingly fraught and all–consuming as the wedding approached, and suspected that a spot of Lapsang Souchong and a good old natter might be just what she needed right now.