Snow and Mistletoe

As I pull out stuff to make sandwiches, I think about how I should get a cat or a dog. Something to keep me company during times like this. I enjoy my solitude and being away from the world, but at times it gets really lonely. When I do go into town, I don’t talk to people unless I have to, and I try to cover up my scars as much as possible. I don’t like people looking at me and wondering what happened. Or worse, feeling sorry for me.

Shaking off that thought, I go back to making myself something to eat. When that’s done, I go over to the living room and sit down in front of the fire. I stare at the flames, thinking about Noelle and wondering what she’s doing right now.

She’s probably with her family like every other normal person. Enjoying her Christmas Eve with loved ones, or maybe going out with friends. Maybe she’ll meet someone while she’s out, someone who can be seen in public with her and who won’t feel the need to hide himself.

I think about what it would be like to spend Christmas with Noelle. If I was whole, and she was mine, I think I’d overdose on Christmas cheer. I’d want to spend all day in bed, cuddled up naked and keeping warm. I’d want to make love to her over and over, only letting her out of bed to make cookies with me and to open presents by the fire. Naked, of course. I’d want to taste every inch of her curvy body, eating her pussy in front of the fireplace. I’d want to fuck her over the kitchen counter so she was covered with flour and sprinkles. I’d drag her outside to make snow angels until she was frozen, and then I’d drag her into the tub and give her a bath until she was warm. I’d hold her close to me that night and whisper in her ear how much I lov—.

“Come on, Alex,” I tell myself, trying to shake off the fantasy. It’s not real, and it never will be. What I have is in my head and nothing more. Thinking I need something to lift my spirits, I walk to my bedroom and grab Noelle’s recording along with my cell phone. I glance down at it as I walk back to the kitchen and freeze when I see a missed call from her.

I don’t think twice as I call her back immediately, wondering how I could have missed it. Oh yeah, I was busy jerking off a couple of times listening to her read dirty books out loud. Jesus, Alex, could you be more fucking lame?

After just one ring, the call disconnects, and I look down at my phone, seeing I’ve got service. I try again and again I get disconnected after one ring. I try five more times and nothing happens. I get a sick feeling in my stomach. What if something happened? What if something went wrong?

I check the time she called and see that it was over three hours ago. I start to worry. Who can I call and talk to? How can I find out if she’s okay? Did I get a family member contact when I had her sign her contract? God, why didn’t I think of something like this happening?

I start to pace the living room, thinking of how to get in touch with her, when I see headlights flash across the room.

“What the fuck?”

Who could possibly be coming to my house? I’ve never had anyone come here, and my family wouldn’t just show up without telling me. Maybe they’re lost. But my driveway is three miles long. Whoever comes down the road this far knows where they’re going.

I go to the hall closet and grab the bat I keep in there. I have a hunting rifle, but it’s in the back of the house and not loaded. Probably not the best place for it in this situation, but I’ve never needed it before.

I pull on my boots as fast as I can. I throw on my coat and walk towards the front door. I see the Jeep turn into the driveway and park just as I walk off the porch and down the front steps. I stand there for half a second, holding the bat, and wait to see who gets out. The snow is really pouring down now, and even a few feet away from the car, it’s hard to make out what’s happening.

When a small woman in a big coat and stocking cap rounds the back of the Jeep, I squint as I try to make out who it is. She stops short when she sees me with a bat in my hand, and it’s then I realize I don’t have anything on to cover my face. I’m not wearing a hat or scarf, and my scars must frighten her.

I can’t see her eyes very well with all the snow that’s coming down, but I lower the bat a little, thinking she must need some kind of help to come out this far.

“Alex?”

The one word nearly knocks me over on my ass. I let the bat drop into the snow and I turn around, quickly giving Noelle my back. I can’t let her see me. How did she even get here?

“What are doing here, Noelle?” I can hear the cold callous sound in my voice, but I can’t stop it.

“I…I had a problem with my internet. I needed to get the book back to you today.”

Her warm voice is silky, like melted caramel rolling over my tense shoulders and penetrating my heart. My cock responds to her like it always does, going rock hard even in this frosty weather.

“You shouldn’t be out in this weather.” All I can think about is how dangerous it was for her to come here.

There’s silence for half a second, and then I hear her feet shuffle slightly. “You’re right. It was a real bitch getting here. I’m sorry. I tried to call, but I didn’t want to miss a deadline.” I hear her nervous laughter and have to rein myself in from going to comfort her. “I’m sorry, we can do this another time. I’ll just make my way back to town and try to call you later.”