‘Do you have to go there now?’
‘No, Shane is there.’
‘Do you need me to do anything?’
I shake my head and kiss her on the top of her head. ‘Go back to bed. I’ve got some calls to make. I’ll be in shortly.’
‘OK.’ She turns around and starts walking toward the bedroom.
‘Oh, Lil, would you like to go on a trip tomorrow?’
She turns around slowly. ‘By myself?’
‘Of course not. With me, obviously.’
She beams at me. ‘Of course I would.’
I feel that dizzy rush to my head. It is unbelievable how crazy I am about her. She is waiting for me to explain. Tell her where or why. But I don’t and she walks away from me. Smiling, but confused.
Lily
I don’t close the door to the living room and go back to bed. Instead I stand at the top of the stairs and listen, but there are no more sounds to be heard other than Jake going into the dining room and shutting the door behind him. I go back to the bedroom and lie on the bed.
So the Pilkingtons have firebombed Eden. I frown. The information in the file Mills gave me clearly stated that both crime families maintain distant but cordial relations, and have their areas clearly drawn up. If it was the Pilkingtons, there is no doubt that this is a declaration of war. But why? There is no benefit to either family to engage in all-out turf war.
Hours later, when a small sliver of light seeps under the curtain, Jake comes back to bed. I pretend to be asleep. He stands over me watching me sleep. I keep my breathing even and deep. Eventually, he goes over to his side of the bed. I can hear him peeling off his clothes before the mattress gives way to his weight.
I make a small sound, as if I have just woken up, and turning around mumble incoherently. He is sitting with his back to me, but his head is turned down to look at me. I blink up at him. In the blue light of dawn his back is an intriguing play of shadows and gleaming muscles, but his eyes are densely black.
All I want to do is grab his silky hair and drag his mouth onto mine. This is exactly the moment of vulnerability that I have been waiting for. It must be exploited. I reach out a hand, and a frisson of electricity goes through me when our skins touch.
‘It’s not just random kids, is it?’
‘Probably not,’ he admits very softly.
‘You know who it is, don’t you?’
His voice is guarded. ‘Maybe.’
‘Why did they do it?’
He sighs. ‘I don’t know yet, but I intend to find out.’
‘Why are we going away tomorrow?’
‘Because I need to think.’
‘Where are we going?’
‘Ibiza.’
I could have pushed more, but suddenly I am filled with an odd and surprising sensation. Not to take or break. But the acute regret that I am unable to savor him, as I would a fine wine. If only I was his real girlfriend. If only he could really trust me. If only I could help him instead of finding a way to trap him.
The thoughts are burdensome. Willfully breaking what I have believed in for so long. But mostly because they betray the promises I have made to Luke. And I am faithful if nothing else. My loyalty must be to Luke at all times.
He lies down beside me. For a while there is only the sound of our breathing.
‘I’m here for you,’ I whisper. And the odd thing is I mean it.