It wasn’t like Dad to not keep up appearances, and my not coming home made people talk. Speculate. Lawson, Alabama, was a small town. My staying somewhere else had to have gotten around. I figured they were saying I was rebelling or something like that. My mail was going to their house, though, and with that, all my info from Ole Miss. Dad wouldn’t want me not to go to Ole Miss. That would make him look bad.
I expected he’d be around soon enough. I’d been back here for a while. I was surprised Momma had held off coming to see me this long. It hurt. Worse than an eighteen-year-old guy wanted to admit. I missed her and I was worried about her. Knowing she didn’t feel the same was hard to accept. It was an empty feeling that no one should ever experience.
Where did I belong if my own momma didn’t care about me?
I had a job to get to, and having a fucking pity party for myself was pointless. I’d beat the hell out of my father and he’d had it coming. I wasn’t sorry I did it. I was just sorry Momma didn’t understand that he needed it. That it was time someone stood up to him. He was a bully and she stayed with him anyway.
I left early enough to get gas. My truck was low, but I knew I could make it to work and back without filling up. I just figured I’d stop by and get it now instead of later. If I saw Ezmita, that was fine. Didn’t mind seeing her. Might be nice to see her. Might be a bad idea to see her.
Turning into the Quick Stop, I decided to stop overthinking and just pump my fucking gas like I had been doing for the past two years. I didn’t look toward the store for a peek at her. She might not be working, for all I knew. She could be out with Brett doing whatever the hell. Seemed like they were fans of watching shit on the television.
He could at least be more creative with their dates. Boring Brett Darby.
“Hey, Asa.” Ezmita’s voice snapped me out of my thoughts on Brett.
I lifted my head from the pump in my hand, then turned to see her standing behind me on the other side of the pump. She had on a pair of white shorts and a red tank top that made her olive complexion even more appealing.
“Hey,” I replied, smiling at the sight of her. I’d missed her. Damn. That sucked.
She looked nervous, and I didn’t want to make her feel nervous. She’d come out here to speak to me, and I wasn’t ready for her to leave just yet. So, I said the first thing I thought of. “How was your movie? Hope I didn’t spoil it.”
Her eyes widened a bit then, and she glanced down at her feet, then back up at me. “Oh, no, you didn’t. I mean, I don’t think The Lord of the Rings can be spoiled. It’s bad enough as it is,” she said.
I laughed then. I liked her cheeky-ass attitude. She was blunt and it was refreshing. “Beat the hell out of anyone at Madden lately?” I asked her, keeping the mood light.
She shook her head. “No, my brothers stopped playing me. They don’t like to lose.”
I laughed then and it felt too damn good. The heaviness in my chest from earlier was gone that easily. Another warning sign. This girl had powers she didn’t know she possessed. I couldn’t depend on anyone. Especially a girl. Run away, Asa, run away now. Finish pumping the gas, say good-bye, and get in your truck.
“I wanted to apologize for the other night. If Brett hadn’t been there, I’d have liked to join you… all of you… not just you.” Her cheeks blushed as she stumbled over her words. Damn, she was fucking cute when she was being awkward.
Get. In. The. Truck. Asa, I repeated firmly to myself.
“I shouldn’t have just shown up last minute. No worries,” I replied as the pump clicked, having filled up the truck. Now I would leave.
“I didn’t mind—I was glad you did,” she said.
“Are you dating Brett exclusively, Ezmita?” That was not getting in the truck. I needed to shut up and leave, but I wanted an answer.
She shook her head. “No, and I’m not sure we are even dating anymore at all… really…?”
Interesting. “Okay. Well, if that’s the case, you want to go get dinner tonight? Maybe go to the drive-in movie over in Franklin?” Well, damn. I was doing this. Even knowing it was a bad idea, I had no more willpower. I liked this girl too much.
Her smile at my question made my stupidity seem irrelevant. I liked it when she smiled like that. She had a great smile. “I’d love to,” she replied quickly, leaving me no doubt she was interested. I knew she was. Who had I been kidding? I just couldn’t let her get hurt. I wasn’t the guy you dated seriously.