More Than Enough (Pelican Bay 4)

We sat there for several long moments as each of us dealt internally with the memories of that day and every single one that had followed.

“You want forgiveness, Maddox, you have it,” I said simply. “But I need it too. And not just for that day. I’ve been letting you shoulder the blame alone for too long now. I’m in this chair because you heard me pounding on that fucking roof and got help. I’m sitting here in this beautiful place because you came and got me when…”

The memory of my grandmother was a bit too fresh, so I had to stop and collect myself. Not surprisingly, Maddox squeezed my hand.

“You know what I fucking need, Maddox?” I managed to choke out.

“What? Anything,” my friend automatically said.

“I need my best friend back. I need him back so I can tell him about this amazing guy I met but that I keep fucking up with. I need him to tell me how to fucking get over the guy treating me like I was everything and then walking out on me like I was nothing,” I admitted.

I hadn’t meant to tell him so much since he would absolutely know who I was talking about, but the fact was that I’d never felt more alone and confused in my entire life. Sawyer had given me back something I could never put into words, but waking up on that floor alone…

I didn’t even realize Maddox had moved until he was leaning over me. His arms went around my shoulders and then he was embracing my entire upper body. I slung an arm over his back and clung to him.

“I’m sorry,” I croaked as I struggled to hold back the tears.

“Me too,” was all Maddox said.

I wasn’t sure how long he held me for, but I felt a little bit lighter than I had in a long time when he released me and gently clapped me on the back. His eyes looked as watery as mine felt but since neither of us really wanted the waterworks, we both laughed and looked away from one another as we got a hold of ourselves.

“Jett, look,” I heard Maddox softly say.

I turned to look at him but saw that his eyes were on the enclosure. My breath caught in my throat when I saw Apollo standing next to the fence with literally only a handful of feet separating us. It was the closest the animal had gotten to anyone of his own accord, even when we’d been throwing marshmallows to him.

“He couldn’t have heard us, right?” Maddox asked.

“No,” I said.

“So does that mean…?” Maddox began.

“I think so,” I responded. “Can you stay there?” I asked as I slowly put my hands on the wheels of my chair and began rolling them forward. The ground between where I was and the fence was uneven, so it took some work to get my chair to move forward, but the fact that Apollo was watching me and hadn’t done more than take a few steps back from the fence had me working to get the wheels over the ruts and dips. I reached the fence and then waited, fully expecting the dog to take off.

But to my amazement, he stayed where he was. His eyes shifted between me and Maddox and there was a moment where he took a few more steps back but when I heard a crunching sound behind me, I knew why the animal had moved again.

Maddox had quietly turned away from the enclosure and was walking in the opposite direction, leaving me and Apollo alone.

“Just you and me, buddy,” I said softly as I returned my attention to Apollo. I had marshmallows on me but didn’t want to use them, so I simply put my fingers on the fence and waited. After several stops and starts, Apollo finally closed the distance between us and reached out to sniff my fingers. When his tongue tentatively licked over the tips of them, I wanted to shout for joy.

I slowly put a couple of my fingers through the links of the fence and stroked whatever part of Apollo’s face that he would let me. I wanted to laugh and cry when I found a sensitive spot behind his ear that had him stomping his back leg in response to my scratching.

After a moment, Apollo sat down against the fence and just looked at me. His soulful brown eyes were calm instead of wild and I got a glimpse of the dog he’d once been. The soldier, the companion, the loyal friend. My mind went to the pink marshmallows and whoever had fed them to the dog.

“I’ll get you home, buddy, I promise,” I murmured as I closed my fingers around the fence links. Apollo gave me another lick but before I could pet him again, he was jumping away from the fence, his eyes going to a spot over my shoulder. The hair on his back went up again and then he was dashing back to his hiding spot.