Had.
That one word says it all.
“You need to follow your dream,” he tells me. “Go show the world all of your talent.”
I can’t find the words to argue with him because he’s giving up on us.
He’s giving up so fucking easily.
“You’re breaking up with me,” I say quietly. “Aren’t you?”
He swallows hard. “Our lives are in very different places right now, Astrid.”
“I take that as a yes.”
“I’m not in a position to travel the world with you right now.” He gazes into my eyes. “I’m a dad. I have a business to run. You need to put everything you have into pursuing your dream.”
I don’t need him to tell me what I need to do. I can balance both. It wouldn’t be easy, but I could travel back to New York whenever the opportunity presents itself.
If he were committed to us, he would come see me when Stevie has time off school and he could break away from his work.
Love means making it work.
He doesn’t want to try, so I clearly misjudged his feelings. He’s not in love with me. I’m the fool who fell head over heels for him.
He looks beyond me to the front of my store. “I’ll stop by tomorrow with the guitar you loaned Stevie.”
A tear falls onto my cheek. “No. I want her to keep it.”
Nodding, he reaches for my cheek, but I take a full step back. “You should go, Berk.”
He does just that without another word to me.
As soon as I hear the door close behind him, I fall to my knees and sob.
Chapter Fifty-Two
Astrid
“Castle?” Eloise scrunches her nose. “You hired Castle to work at Vinyl Crush?”
Nodding, I point toward the kitchen. “I’m not hungry, Eloise. You know where the dishes are if you want to help yourself.”
She gazes down at the large paper bag in her hand. “I bought enough Italian food to feed six people, Astrid. You haven’t eaten anything in days.”
In four days, to be precise.
It’s been four days since Berk left my store with my heart in his hands.
“If I make a plate with a little bit of baked ravioli, will you try to eat a few bites?” she asks tentatively. “The owner of the restaurant, Mrs. Calvetti, also threw in a piece of ricotta cheesecake for us to share for dessert.”
I’ve been turning down all the food Eloise has been offering me for the past few days. I give in just to put a smile on her face. “I’ll try.”
“Good.” She shrugs off the green cardigan she’s wearing to reveal a new T-shirt.
I let out a laugh. It’s the first time I’ve done that in days.
“You like?” She tugs on the hem. “I know there will be licensing rules and all of that once you’ve signed the contract, so I thought I better wear it now before Keyline sends me a cease and desist letter.”
I’ve never seen my face on a T-shirt before. I’ve also never imagined the words Grammy Winner associated with me.
I don’t know if that will ever happen, but I’m glad that Eloise is dreaming big dreams for me.
“It’s great,” I say softly. “Your support means a lot to me, Eloise.”
She places the bag of food on the coffee table before she takes a seat next to me. “I will always support every decision you make, Astrid. I admit I’m not super keen on working with Castle. I thought you were going to interview a few people and make a decision based on that.”
That was the plan.
I had put those wheels in motion before I was offered a contract with Keyline.
I posted an online ad looking for someone to help out. I was inundated with responses, but when Castle strolled into the store this morning, and I mentioned that I was looking to hire someone, he confessed that he’d recently lost his job.
“He knows music,” I tell her. “His references checked out, and I trust him, Eloise.”
“Trust is important,” she agrees. “I guess I’ll get used to working with him.”
“You will.”
Her gaze drifts to the coffee table. “How are you doing today, Astrid? Give it to me straight. Don’t sugarcoat it.”
Now would be the time I’d make a comment about the blue sweater I’m wearing to steer the conversation in another direction.
Eloise brought the sweater over yesterday along with chicken soup from a deli around the corner.
I’ve spent all of my days inside Vinyl Crush taking inventory and helping customers. The nights have been the hardest, so Eloise has made a point of stopping by every evening after work with something to eat.
“I’m sad,” I whisper. “It hurts a lot.”
She moves to wrap an arm around my shoulder. “I’d say that I know how that feels, but I don’t. I’ve never been in love.”
I glance at her. “I wonder when the pain goes away.”
She leans her head against mine. “I wish I knew.”