In the end, it wasn’t enough.
Maybe I wasn’t enough.
For a while, I allowed his unfaithfulness to mess with my head along with my confidence. It took some time to realize that he was the problem, not me. And he certainly wasn’t the only athlete cheating behind his girlfriend’s back. It’s like an epidemic on this campus.
The interaction with Shandi pops into my brain, and thoughts of Crosby swiftly follow. For all I know, he decided to head over to the football house and meet up with her. Or one of the other girls clamoring for his attention. Then again, it doesn’t matter what Crosby Rhodes does with his time. I shake away thoughts of him and focus on the conversation at hand.
“Hey? Are you there?”
“Yes. Sorry.”
“Is this too much for you?” Instead of a growl filling his voice, hesitation does. It’s the last thing I want.
“Not at all.” It takes effort to push out the words. I’ve thought them plenty of times but never said them out loud, let alone to another person. “What I like most is having my breasts played with.”
“Mmm. Are they sensitive?”
“Very.” They always have been.
“Are you touching them right now?”
“What?” My eyes fly open. I glance at the door, hoping that Sasha or Easton didn’t hear the near shout, before lowering my voice to a whisper. “No, of course not!”
“I want you to do it while I’m on the phone.”
Oh god.
“You want me to…” My words trail off into nothingness as my throat turns bone dry.
“Touch yourself?” he says matter-of-factly like it’s no big deal. “Yeah. I want to imagine you playing with your breasts while pretending I’m the one doing it.”
A groan escapes from me as I roll onto my back and consider the request.
Before I can give him an answer, he continues, “I want you to strip off all of your clothes and slide naked between the sheets.”
For a moment, I remain still, deciding if I can actually go through with this. I’m no stranger to masturbation. There were too many times to count when I didn’t get off with Andrew. He never made sure I was there with him before he came. Arousing me wasn’t exactly a high priority for him. Within five minutes of rolling onto his back, he’d be snoring soundly, and I’d have to finish myself off. He was never the wiser. Maybe that’s part of the problem and I should have told him. Maybe then he wouldn’t have thought he was so amazing in bed.
“Have you taken off all your clothes?”
“No,” I say tentatively, “not yet.”
“What are you waiting for?” he growls.
Instead of overthinking the situation, I let my inhibitions go and do as he asks.
Setting down the phone, my fingers rise to the hem of my sweater before I yank it up my body and toss it to the floor. Then I unfasten the bra and pull it from my arms, allowing it to drop. I unsnap the button and lower the zipper of my jeans before quickly working them down my hips and kicking them free. Left in my panties, the cool air of the room wafts over my warm flesh. My nipples tighten as my heart riots. Once I’ve shimmied out of my underwear, I slip beneath the sheets and pull the covers over my body. There’s something delicious about the feeling of cool cotton against my naked flesh.
“Okay, I’m done.”
“Good girl,” he says softly.
Good girl.
Those two little words are all it takes for a burst of arousal to explode in my core.
“Now close your eyes and run your fingers along the valley between your breasts. Back and forth. Nice and slow.” There’s a moment of silence. “Are you doing it?”
“Yes,” I whisper, following his instruction to the T. No longer do I wonder if I can do this.
I want to do it.
“Good. Now run the tips of your fingers to the top of your pussy before dragging them upward again. “How does that feel?”
Mmmm. It’s so good. Especially when I imagine that he’s the one caressing me. That thought has me shifting on the mattress as need unfurls deep within my core.
“It’s really nice.”
“Now bring the same hand to your breast and trace little circles around your nipple without actually touching it.”
My teeth sink into my lower lip as I do exactly as he commands. There’s something so strong and compelling about the way his deep voice washes over me.
“I want you to give the same attention to the other one. Lazy circles that make you crave more.”
Oh god…they’re so stiff. Already my breasts feel heavy and achy.
“Now tweak the first one with your fingers. Give it a good pinch. I want you to feel it straight down to your pussy.”
A whimper escapes from me as I follow his directives. It only takes one tweak for my core to flood with liquid heat.