Her Shadows, His Secrets

What on God’s green earth is this? It is beautiful. I would never have thought to do something like that, but I’m thankful he did. The peace I felt looking through that much smaller kitchen window returns, and I realize in this moment that I will be sleeping here, and that will be my view from sunup to sundown.

I step into the bathroom, which is all white—white and silver marble countertops, white vanity, a separate all-glass shower, and a large jacuzzi tub with a window above it.

“Grandpa must have loved windows,” I whisper, walking through to the attached closet. Flipping on the light, I’m hit with a scent. It’s a cologne and fresh linen smell. For some reason, it brings tears to my eyes, especially as I look at all the clothes and shoes surrounding me. All this time, I had someone. Someone out there who I could have called family. A solace I could have leaned on when everything was dark.

And believe me, everything was dark, often.

I had no one and nothing, while there was a man here who could have loved and accepted me. That’s when it happens. I sink to the ground and sob in the middle of a stranger’s closet. Feeling pain and loss for someone I never knew, but moreover, what he could have been to me and how I will never have the chance to know. I officially have no one, and that is a reality.

I cry because of the life I fled from. I hated my life there, wished so often for an escape or alternate reality, and now I have it. Here in Cherry Hill. I have it, and yet I can’t pick a side to be on. Happiness or loneliness.

Suddenly, I’m interrupted by the sound of the doorbell. I wipe frantically at the tears and snot running down my face. Attractive. Standing, I stop to look in the mirror and see it’s useless. Even cleaned up, my face is red and swollen from crying. Oh well, might just be Jack who forgot to give me something.

Hurrying down the stairs when the bell rings again, I nearly miss the bottom step, catching myself on the front door. Shaking my head, I stand up straight, righting myself, and open the door.

“You all right? Sounded like something fell!” A woman stands in front of me with two Great Danes who must be Dorothy and Clyde.

“Oh yeah, I’m fine. Just tripped. I’m not very coordinated.” She’s stunning—tall, auburn hair, green eyes, and a figure I would kill for.

“Oh no. Well, I’m glad you’re all right! I’m Brenda. I live two houses east of here. I was watching the pups while waiting for your arrival.” Her smile is genuine and soft, very welcoming.

“Thank you so much,” I tell her, and she lifts her brows, still smiling at me. “Oh God, sorry. I’m just having a long day. I’m so rude. Hi, I’m Hanna. It’s nice to meet you.”

The dogs are sniffing me, their tails wagging rapidly.

“They like you. They are great guard dogs but also very sweet. You will love them.”

I stoop down, and immediately they are on me, attacking me with kisses. “Ah! Oh my gosh!” I laugh, trying to save myself, but they’re huge, and I’m outnumbered.

“Clyde, Dorothy, come on. Give your new mama a break.” Brenda helps me up, and once I’m free and back to my full height, I give her a thankful smile. These dogs are anything but pups. They must be nearly my height when they stand on their hind legs.

However, no complaints here. I know I’m a long way from New York, and that is now in the past; I’m in a new place, in the middle of farmland, and alone. They might bring me some peace and make me less afraid of the things that go bump in the night.

“Thank you. I’ve never had dogs. They may be more of an undertaking than this house.”

“They seem it, but I promise they are the sweetest yet fiercely protective. I passed a pedestrian on my way here, and they nearly chased him to the other side of the road.” We share a laugh.

“Good to know. Um, I’m not sure if there is anything here to drink. Would you like to come in?” I don’t usually socialize like this, but it’s the least I can do, and wouldn’t it be nice to know at least one person besides Jack?

“I would love to, but I gotta work in the next thirty minutes, and my car is in the shop, so these feet are my ride. But how about I bring you some groceries after work? That way you can get settled, and then this week, I can give you the juicy details of the town and everything you need to know in Cherry Hill.” She winks.