When we aren’t together, I have to fight the urge to text her just to ask her how her day is going. The way she laughs, the way she drops her head when I give her any type of compliment, all these little things shouldn’t do a single thing to me, yet they seem to do the opposite. They pull me in, like she’s the damn puppeteer, and I’m the desperate man hanging from the strings.
I’m drawn to her like people are tethered to earth by gravity, and with each moment we are together, that pull grows stronger, making me angrier and more determined to fuck her harder, as if she means nothing more than a quick fling. But I made a mistake by letting her see me vulnerable last night. I have to rein it in. Stop myself from whatever messed up thing is happening in my mind.
I chalk this up to being without a woman for a while. Even before I came here, I hadn’t had an arrangement in some time. That’s it. Yep. That’s all it is.
“Listen, you don’t have to be afraid to admit you like someone. People can change their ways, bud.”
Rolling my eyes, I grumble, “Come on, B. You know that’s not me.”
“Why can’t it be? You think I don’t see it? The way you look at her when you think none of us are looking? And don’t get me started on both the shopping and lake incidents. What the hell was that then?”
“What?”
She scoffs. “You about ripped off his arms, and then you tore her away like a caveman. You could have waited for her to get home to do whatever it is you two are doing, but you came and stole her away. And if she means nothing to you, then why does the idea of another man showing interest in her bother you so damn much, macho man?” As she points out all the exact things I’ve been ruminating over, I realize we are more similar than I like to admit.
I cling most to the idea of any other man eventually coming around after I end it. I want to end them. Literally cut off their hands that will touch her. Remove their eyes from their skulls for even looking at her. I am territorial and possessive when it comes to her, and that isn’t something I’ve hidden very well.
I think up something quick. “Because part of our agreement is she and I are exclusive. I don’t have to love her, to not want another man trying to take her from me.”
“Who said anything about love? I just said like.”
Hanna pulls into the driveway, and Brenda is up, heading to meet her, but I’m stunned silent in my chair. She’s right. She never said anything about love.
What am I going to do? What’s going to happen when the truth comes out? Because it has to.
It has to.
The lines just blurred, and I’m not sure what to do now.
Brenda and Hanna come walking up the steps, and even in just jeans and a tank top that I’m sure she wore under her work shirt, she looks gorgeous. Her long hair is in a ponytail curled at the ends, and some loose hairs fall and frame her face. Her makeup is light, showing a little of the freckles that came from the tan she got at the lake.
I want her then, tempted to send Brenda away. Imagining myself lapping at her slit, biting her thick thighs, kissing her soft stomach, sucking her neck, all of it, it’s all I want to do. It’s been less than twelve hours since I’ve seen her, and it’s like days have passed.
“Theo?” she prompts.
“Huh, yeah?”
“I said hi, and you were zoned out. You all right?” Hanna steps up to me, rubbing my arm. Her touch sends an electric bolt through me, and I ignite.
“Hand Brenda the key. Go inside, B, and give us a minute.” I don’t take my hungry eyes off Hanna.
Worry overtakes her face, and she hands her keys to Brenda.
“Whatever you say, Captain.”
Once she’s inside and out of view, I pin Hanna to wall beside her front door.
She gasps. “Theo, what—”
Cutting her off, I take her mouth viciously. She moans against my tongue, finally giving in and matching me. We sync up, and she puts her hands on my hips. Violently, I grab her breast in one hand and her neck with the other. Finally moving from her lips, I want to taste the rest of her. I move to her cheek, then her jaw and to her ear, sucking and groaning, rubbing my erection against her.
“Theo. What’s wrong? Are you okay?”
“I just want you so goddamn bad. You look so beautiful, so sexy. All I can think about is being inside you.”
She giggles when I kiss her neck, my three-day stubble tickling her. “Baby.” She throws her head back.