“I won’t be able to empty it until we leave. If I empty it during the day or before we leave for the gala and he has a reason to go in there, it will blow it all,” I mumbled quietly. The cogs in my head began to try and work out exactly how I’d retrieve the money. Maybe leaving the cash all together might have to be an option if I couldn’t think of something doable.
Nikoli stayed quiet. His hand moved towards mine and his fingers laced between my fingers where he gave a small squeeze. “You need a reason to go back into the house once you’ve made your way to the car,” he said quietly.
“Like what?”
“Forget your purse. Leave it somewhere he won’t notice it before you head to the car. Wait for him to start it, then you announce you’ve forgotten it. That way you have an excuse to go back, get into the safe and grab the money.”
I nodded my head in agreement. It could work, he’s always calling me dumb and wet behind the ears and it wouldn’t be the first time I’d forgotten my purse. Sure, he’ll shout and mutter obscenities about how I’ll make him late, but it would be worth it.
“What do I do with it once I have it?” I asked.
He smiled and kissed my cheek. “Does your bedroom window face the front or the back of the house?”
“Uhm, the front. Why?”
“What room is across from yours that faces the back of the house?”
“Max’s office and a spare bedroom, why?” I asked, still unsure of where this plan was heading.
“Well then, it’s easy. You drop the money into a plastic bag, tie it up and drop it out of one of the back windows into the garden. Once you leave, I’ll head into the garden and retrieve it before I come to the gala.”
I swallowed hard and dropped my head towards my lap, my eyes entranced on the movement of Nikolai’s thumb sweeping across my hand. “Do you think it could work? What if Max decides he’s going back for my purse?”
Still gripping my hand, he turned his body towards me, “Look at me,” he said quietly. I raised my head and turned it to look at him, my free hand moved towards him and I moved his hair back from his forehead with a small smile.
“I don’t know if this plan is going to work. I don’t have the answers, I wish I did. Whatever happens that night, I want you to make me a promise,” he said. I caught the urgency in his tone and his hand squeezed tighter around mine, practically numbing it.
“Yes,” I encouraged with a slight nod of my head.
I watched him swallow, then his tongue rolled across his lips, “If this goes wrong, you promise me that whatever happens, you’ll get away from him. You do whatever you must, even if you must hide from him or attack him back. You promise to get away and I’ll come and find you.”
A feeling of dread crawled down my spine like tiny ants marching towards their doom. My body seemed to set like stone, almost like rigor mortis and my mind was suddenly filled with worry at all the things that could go wrong. I knew I couldn’t foresee the future, but I already knew that every single night I would silently pray to God, that when the benefit gala was here and it became my time to free myself of this living nightmare, that things would slip into place, causing my dream of a better life to become a reality.
“Promise me,” he reiterated harsher and more sternly.
“I promise, I promise.”
Untangling his hand from mine, he enveloped his arms around me and crushed me towards his chest then kissed the top of my head. “Good. I couldn’t bear it if something happened to you, Myshka.”
I buried my face in his chest, deeply breathing in the now familiar scent of Nikoli, his warmth told me that I was safe with him. I grabbed his top and pulled myself closer to his body, I needed his warmth to tell me that everything was going to be okay. As I was coiled around him, I can feel the coldness of Max slowly leave my heart to be replaced by warmth from Nikoli.
All my life I felt lost, felt like I didn’t belong, that I had no purpose and inwardly that feeling shattered me, ripping apart my soul bit by bit. I was like a bird trying to fly too close to the sun, only the intense heat smoldering me, would make me swoop back down to the ground, landing harder with each fall, but in this shared act of intimacy between Nikoli and I, I felt like everything in my small universe was right, for the first time in twenty-two years.
“Max is away tomorrow night, maybe I can join you all for a birthday drink,” I found myself saying as my fingers lightly traced over the defined muscles of his clothed back.
“He is, is he?” He responded playfully but I caught the seduction in his tone. “Maybe my birthday won’t be as much shit as I was expecting, then.”
He pulled my head back from his chest and without a word, his lips claimed mine. Small moans of delight rumbled in my mouth when his kiss became more passionate. “Nikoli,” I panted. I pushed a hand between our pressed chests and pushed him back. “The time?”
His eyes grew wide as he looked at his watch, “Fuck! We need to go, we’ve been here two hours, class finished an hour ago!”
I scrambled to my feet, grabbing my stuff, and followed behind him, heading towards the door. He stopped and spun around causing me to crash straight into him. Laughing, I swatted him in the chest. It was like running in to a brick wall. He chuckled as he steadied me, “I’m going to ask you something, Raine and I only want a resounding yes or no,” he said suddenly seriously. His smile faded.
“Okay,” I breathed. My eyebrows furrowed and I pulled my bottom lip into my mouth as agitation became known to him when I proceeded to slightly bounce up and down on the soles of my still bare feet.
“Lately, in the early hours of the morning when most of the city is asleep, I’m still wide awake thinking of you, wondering what it would feel like to hold your naked body next to mine, what it would be like to fall asleep with you and wake up next to you the following morning,” he paused, sighed deeply then pinched the bridge of his nose.
“What are you asking me, Nikoli?” I asked quietly.