“I’m joking, of course. This whole idea is laughable,” I tell her.
Dakota lifts a brow and nods.
“Guys, just give it some thought,” Anna pleads. “A fake wedding announcement for the marketing campaign with you both doing photo shoots would be a sensational endorsement. It’s a unique spin, considering your social media clout, Mr. Burns. We could even work up some wild story about how the whole line was inspired by your love. Can you imagine the sales?” Her eyes are huge, gleaming with excitement.
For once, I regret how Anna can be a human Rottweiler when it comes to ideas.
I wish like hell she’d drop this one.
“Personal endorsements have worked out insanely well for other brands,” Cheryl says from the corner, looking up from her phone. “I bought three years’ worth of perfume last Christmas because the owner wouldn’t stop talking about how awesome her life is on TikTok ever since she started wearing her own stuff.”
“That’s cool and all, but marrying my bossasaurus—fake marrying—was never in the job description. That’s just too much,” Dakota says.
“Bossasaurus, huh? I like it,” Anna says with a grin. “See? You two already bicker like a real couple all the time. Are you sure you don’t want to give it the teensiest little try?”
The room bursts into laughter and frantic whispers. Even a few of the people who’d stepped away before are back in here.
Goddamn, do I hate how fast word travels in this office.
Dakota’s face is painted crimson when I look back at her.
My chest clenches like there’s a caged animal trying to get out.
This must be killing her.
Sure, it’s not like the heartbreak in my office when we had that little chat about her poetry. I could bring the color back to her face by letting her know how talented she is and then infuriating her with a few thoughtless remarks.
But we’re in a crowded room today.
She’s justifiably mortified at this, the dumbest shit ever, and anything I say will just make it worse.
Anna shrugs and her eyes meet mine. “I know it’s not your style, boss. I respect your concerns. I just hope you might mull it over. This could be the difference between this line doing well and a Vera Wang breakout success.”
Dakota bites her lip. “Nothing will ever tie Vera. We’re not even in the same category.”
My jealousy bone twitches.
“Why’s that, Miss Poe? We’re a luxury line with a damn fine product, even if we don’t have their international presence and we’re a bit more localized,” I say.
“When I say Hershey, you think chocolate. When I say Vera, you think bridal,” Dakota explains slowly. “And when I say Haughty But Nice...you think high school mean girl or real housewife of King County. Your other lines are pretty well known in the regional market, but if I mentioned this brand back home in North Dakota? Bridal wouldn’t be the first word that comes to mind. Until it is, Vera isn’t your direct competitor.”
Damn her, she’s right.
Marketing this line could be harder than I realized in a crowded space—especially when we’re a mostly local entity native to the West Coast.
I also hate considering that Anna could be right.
We’ll have to flex our creative muscles like never before, but I’m still not fake marrying an employee.
With Dakota being Dakota, me being me, and our entire working relationship resembling a fucking dumpster fire, that spells one word, and one word only.
Disaster, written out in blood-red.
11
My Bosom’s Core (Dakota)
“So, you’ll do it?” Anna asks. “Because we’re not a breakout success until we’re butting heads with the big boys and girls. Right now, we’re the dusty back of the rack at an Alfred Angelo bridal store.”
“Nope. Not even if he were the last man alive and this was the last job on earth,” I say, drumming my fingers on the table.
“Oh, please. If the rest of the world was in ruins, there’d be no more of those damn rolls to fight over,” Captain Snarlypants says. “I hate it just as much as you, but it would be very colorful marketing, wouldn’t it?”
“Would you shut up?”
“I could, but I’m enjoying you flustered too much, Nevermore.”
Ugh. He would.
“Miss Poe can stop panicking, and Miss Patel can quit badgering us,” he continues. “Obviously, it would be grossly inappropriate for me to marry an employee—fake or otherwise—and Miss Poe has already said she’s not interested. Keep bringing it up, Miss Patel, and I’m afraid you’ll be my decoy bride.”
She gives him a horrified look.
I meet his eyes suspiciously. Is he defending me? Really?
Anna folds her arms in front of her chest with an annoyed humph!
“I’m willing to take one for the team, but I’m not sure I have Dakota’s special chemistry with you, bossman,” she says with a knowing smile.
Yikes. Isn’t that the truth and the entire problem?
“I’m not sure what chemistry you’re referring to,” Lincoln lies. “However, this engagement ruse was your idea. Since Miss Poe isn’t interested, if I’m crazy enough to let you do this, you’ll have to step up and play ball.”