Blame It On The Gin:On The Rocks

"Lisa will jump ship and come over to the dark side?"

I laugh. "I don't think you're the dark side. Paper Possibilities is an eco-company too, right? We're on the same team."

"Sure," Bobby says. "That's true."

"Like I was saying, if you're looking for someone, I have this resume in front of me that looks like an A+ candidate."

"Why aren't you hiring her then?" Bobby says. "Why pass her off to me?"

"I'd hire her if I could, but I already have Lisa. I'm looking to fill a PR assistant position. This girl's way overqualified."

"All right," Bobby says. "Have your assistant send the resume over to me. I'll take a look. It would be great if we could hire someone Monday. I know the rest of my team is getting a little annoyed that I haven't filled the position yet."

"Maybe you were just waiting for the right person."

"Business aside," Bobby says, "tonight, you and I can grab dinner and then head to On The Rocks. I need to get laid so I’m looking for some fun."

I scoff. "I don't do hookups."

"I know," Bobby says, "but you need to live a little."

"Whatever," I say. "I am not looking for a one-night stand. I'm looking for marriage material."

Now it's time for Bobby to scoff. "Dude, you're crazy."

"Not crazy," I say. "I'm just a man who knows what he wants."

2

GINNY

It's my twenty-second birthday and I feel like literal garbage, which might be a slight exaggeration, but I was really hoping to get that job today. I was already there for the interview, and before I even set foot in front of the boss man, I was dismissed. One look at my resume and I wasn’t even worth a conversation!

Tori, my roommate, walks into my bedroom with a margarita. "Drink up, baby. It's time to get ready to go out." She’s the life of the party, has been since we were in high school, and me, well, I've always been the introvert.

"I don't really even want to go out anymore." I say, taking the drink from her and taking a sip. It's strong. I set it down on my dresser, uninterested. Then I fall on my bed, groaning.

"You're so melodramatic," Tori says, which is funny to me because she's always the one who carries drama with her. Me, I've always been the sensible one, the reliable one, the one who does what she's supposed to do.

I roll over in bed, burying my face in a pillow, and scream.

"Okay," Tori says, "it's time to calm down. You're literally losing it, birthday girl."

"Can we just stay home and watch the new episode of Married at First Sight?"

Tori puts her hands on her hips and shakes her head. "Not happening. We're going out. The other girls are coming too." "The other girls" refers to our college roommates who we still see a lot. We're all just out of college and broke as hell. I was hoping this new job might get me on my feet and get me out of part-time barista gigs. I really want a career, a career that affords me an apartment all my own. I'm not even looking for my own bedroom. It can be a studio. That would be more than fine.

But Tori is giving me a no-nonsense look. "Ginny, I know this is out of your comfort zone, but there's a bunch of things in your life you're unhappy with right now. Not having a job, not having a boyfriend, not having a... Okay. Is it just two things?"

I laugh and throw the pillow at Tori. "See, you are the dramatic one and I'm not even that upset about not having a boyfriend. I'm only twenty-two years old. I don't need to be in a committed relationship."

"Sure," Tori says, "but you've never even been laid. Don't you think it's time for you to pop your cherry?" She claps her hands. "Ooh. Maybe we can make that happen tonight."

"Maybe not." I say, reaching for my bottle of water and taking a long drink. If we're going out to a bar tonight, I need to be hydrated. The last thing I want is to get tipsy with the girls. They're up for a wild time and me, I'm always the designated driver.

"Okay, so you're going to get dressed. What are you wearing?" Tori says, rummaging through my clothes rack that's in the middle of the bedroom, dividing my side from hers. "I was thinking that black dress, the velvet one." I sit up in bed and run my fingers through my long black hair. The idea of flat ironing it to go out seems daunting. It's thick and unruly.

I fall back in bed. "Will you just wake me up when it's time to go out?"

"I can't believe you're this depressed over not getting a job. It clearly wasn't the best place for you."