9
BILLIE’S POV
Oh my God! What the hell was wrong with me? What was I doing? Every time I was sure that I was going to take a step back and not overcomplicate things further, something happened, making me lose my shit all over again.
Thank God Joey was in bed right now, taking a well-earned nap. He did not need to be here in the middle of this. This could really turn into a shit show. I had no idea how anyone was going to react to this. Phoenix, because I'd just kissed him in the middle of our tidy up session. Jasper, because we'd shared an intense connection that hadn’t transformed into anything physical, but definitely meant something. Grant, who I shared that crazy moment in the yard with, and then pushed him away because of everything related to Cody, just to end up here.
And Cody. Shit Cody. He was the last person I wanted to see in this moment because he was going to hate me. I could hardly handle it. His eyes were definitely piercing all the way through me, he wanted to connect with me, but I couldn't do it.
How long had they all been standing there watching me? Why wasn't anyone speaking? I seriously wished that someone would break the silence.
Phoenix rested his hands on my shoulders, showing his support. I glanced up to look at him, to at least see how he was feeling. Immediately, relief flooded me. I felt so much better because Phoenix was grinning at me like everything was fine. Right, of course, this was normal to them. They wouldn't bat an eye.
If anything, the other guys might have wanted to join in. Perhaps they liked the sight of me kissing Phoenix and wanted a piece of it themselves. Now that idea sent a shudder down my spine. A shudder of sheer delight. I liked it too.
Yeah, I barely recognized myself anymore. I loved this idea, I wanted this, I ached for it. I would have loved these four men to all scoop me up in their arms, and to take me in whatever way they wanted. But I knew they wouldn't take that step, not without my consent, and I was a little too scared to do what needed to be done to bring us all together.
I had to do it––I couldn’t stop the connection that had morphed between us. All I needed to do was show that I wanted this as much as they seemed to as well.
I pushed up on my tiptoes, all caught up in the heat of the fantasy playing out in my mind. I didn't really know what I was doing, but I knew what I wanted, and it was Phoenix once more. Yes, with everyone watching. That was kind of part of it. I liked it. I wanted all their eyes on me, whether it was weird and wrong or not. Whether it was going to overcomplicate everything or not, I just wanted it.
I pressed my lips to Phoenix’s with my heart hammering hard against my rib cage. Hot blood pumped all around my body, my desire fizzed all the way through me, and I couldn't stop myself from deepening the kiss.
Desire flew from my mouth. I groaned against Phoenix, pressing myself up against him. I was breathless, heady, needy for more. But I didn't take more. Not yet. I broke apart from Phoenix, but kept my deep dark eyes on him. I smiled, biting down on my bottom lip as I let Phoenix silently know that I wanted him.
Then, I guess I was caught up in an intense sense of bravery because I didn't stop there. Worry no longer had a hold on me. I was just acting on impulse. I grabbed Grant first, pulling him towards me with the scruff of his shirt. He wasn't pissed off, thank goodness. I could see an element of intrigue in his eyes––intrigue which exploded into fireworks as our lips connected once more.
This was one hell of a sign, wasn't it? That I was up for the whole polyamory deal––not just in my imagination, but in real life as well.
Grant slipped through my fingers, but with a happy, cocked eyebrow. I breathed him in for a second before stepping across to Jasper as well. There was a sweet element of joy in his eyes. He no longer looked as terrified like he did before.
He wanted this, but I was gentle with him. I pressed my lips to his, chastely almost, testing the waters. He relaxed. All the tension that was once in his shoulders seemed to melt away. So I kissed him again, for a little longer this time around. Wow, this was crazy. The chemistry surging between us was much more powerful than I was expecting. It bowled me over, knocked me off my feet.
I wanted to kiss Jasper again for sure. Maybe when we were alone this time around, so we could really let loose. We could really explore one another's bodies. But I was going to have to give him a little moment to adjust to this.
Then it was Cody's turn. I took a couple of seconds to catch my breath before I moved over to him. I knew this was going to be wild, crazy, and potentially explosive. If something was going to happen, then this was it.
But I did it. My God, I had some intense braveness within me. I didn't know where it had come from, but I locked eyes with Cody. I blinked a couple of times, because I couldn't believe what I was looking at. He was overwhelmed, in the best way possible. There was such a deep desire in his eyes that dizziness damn near knocked me off my feet. My knees were jelly, I could hardly hold myself up any longer. Luckily, Cody knew me well enough to grab me before I fell.
By the time his lips crashed on mine, I was ready for him. My heart started to beat in my throat as the desire claimed me, as it swam through my body, connecting me and Cody more. Shit, kissing them all really had me all fired up.
Eventually, Cody let me go. He stepped back with his lips twisted up into a smile. I didn't know what I would do now, seeing as we weren’t going to do anything more than kissing. We all needed a moment to process this, so with one more smile, I headed out the room and up the stairs to check on my son.
As I walked, my brain span some more. I thought about the real possibility of a harem lifestyle for me. I'd never thought of entering an unconventional romance before. I'd never considered stepping out of the mark of what was considered 'normal', but why not? What the hell was stopping me? I wasn't about to live my life for anyone else, was I? I was living it for me. If that made me happy, then so be it.
Hmm, but what about Joey? Would he like it? He sure as hell liked being in the house with all the guys. He got along well with all of them, he would surely enjoy it... well, until the truth came out about him and Cody of course. That would change everything.
Yeah, I was getting ahead of myself here, wasn't I? I was one, assuming that the guys wanted to have a harem life with me. This could just be a fling for them. While they were here looking after me, they could just want a little fun. And two, I really couldn't work out how Cody was going to react to the truth of his fatherhood.
"Oh, Joey, you're awake." Actually, this wasn't much of a surprise. He wasn't much one for napping. "Are you hungry, buddy? Do you want a snack?"
"Yeah, I am!" Joey's eyes lit up. "That sounds amazing. My tummy is growling."
I helped him pick up the Legos he had scattered around the floor, my head spinning the whole time. I wondered what the hell was going on downstairs. Were the guys all still in the same room, talking about me? Gossiping about what might happen next between us all. I hoped they wanted it as much as I did. I hoped they weren't weirded out by the whole thing. I definitely wasn't weirded out. I was on fire, every part of my body was excited and thrilled. Ooh, the anticipation was intense.
"Come on then." I took Joey's hand and headed down the stairs together. I strained my ears, trying to see if I could pick anything up, but there was nothing. I wished that I had wolf ears, especially for this moment.
Okay, so the guys weren't all together, talking about me. They'd gone on to do their own activities. I could only assume that Phoenix and Grant were out scouting the area, and Cody was in the gym. I found Jasper in his usual place in the kitchen.
He span around as soon as he heard me and caught my eyes. His eyes lit up, and he smiled at me, with a much more relaxed expression than before. Good, I liked that. It felt nice seeing him this way.
"I'm hungry!" Joey cried out, not at all worried about the tension in the air. "Is there anything to eat? I love your cooking, Jasper."
"Actually, I've just finished off making apple pie," Jasper replied. "Do you want a piece with ice cream? I want your opinion on it."
Joey took a seat and keenly waited for something to eat. The look that he gave Jasper was one of pure adoration. He liked him a lot, I was sure that he would have loved to have him around forever. I kept trying my hardest not to get all caught up in the idea that we could be some big happy family, but it was hard for the idea not to claim me when I was so caught up in my emotions and desire like this.
"Mmm, this is delicious!" Joey gasped through bites of the pie. "I love it."
"Well, good." Jasper grinned from ear to ear. "I'm glad to hear it. Your opinion means a lot to me, Joey. I know that you'll always be honest with me."
Jasper gave Joey some more pie which he ate up happily. I focused on getting us all drinks while we relaxed for a while––hot drinks for me and Jasper, and a juice for Joey. It was such a sweet, peaceful moment on the surface, but underneath, I was a mess. I had that all too familiar weakness in my knees. The intensity that had always been there between me and Jasper seemed so much more powerful now. The kiss had only amped everything up to yet another level.
I could hear him chatting happily to Joey, talking about food and how he enjoyed experimenting with flavors, even offering to help Joey learn to cook, but ever so often, Jasper would catch my eyes. The new gaze he gave me brought a thick ball of desire to the base of my throat. I couldn't swallow it down however hard I tried.
"Would you like to try some pie?" Jasper suddenly asked me. Ooh, there was a naughtiness to his voice that made my heart skip a beat. I liked the depth to this man. "I have a piece over here for you, with ice cream ready, if you like..."
The words might have been innocuous, but I could sense the undertone. He was seducing me using food, which was a very good tactic. I liked it a lot.
"You should, Mommy! It's really nice. You'll love it." Joey grinned ear to ear. "Jasper is the best cook I have ever met. Even better than you!"
I pretended to be offended, but I wasn't really. It was obvious that Jasper outshone me in the kitchen. I strode over to him, shaking my hips as I went. I loved the way this man seemed utterly mesmerized by my body. It made me feel like a sexy goddess, like I was wading through the thick pool of desire to get to him.
"Give me a taste then," I half whispered as I dragged my tongue hungrily along my lips. Luckily, my son was way too caught up in his own food to be worried about me. "Let's see if this pie really is as good as the rumors suggest."
Jasper was more than happy to play along. He dug the spoon into the pie and ice cream with his eyes fixed on me the entire time. The playfulness within him was thrilling. I couldn't get enough of it. The butterflies in my stomach were growing by the minute, the tingling at my core increasing endlessly.
Then the pie came my way. I parted my lips and edged forwards towards the spoon with my tongue on the edge of my lips. The spoon slipped between my lips, and I sucked back the delicious pie. Oh God, I could have groaned with delight because it was so good. So damn tasty it set my whole body alight. Or maybe that was the look in his eyes. Like he wanted to be the one eating me.
Because I wasn't looking, the ice cream got a little messy. It spilled from the sides of my lips, dribbled down my chin, and down my throat. His eyes traveled down me along with the ice cream, so I did nothing to wipe it off, even as the cold liquid seeped on my chest.
As he continued to follow the ice cream slipping into my top, I felt a wetness of my own pooling in my panties. Holy shit, I was drowning in desire. It had me breathless. Each time I tried to suck back air, it came in sharp and ragged.
Jasper liked it. I could see he liked it a lot, which made me want to rip his clothing off right here and now. But of course, I couldn't do that. No way. Not when Joey was in the room with us.
"Do you like the pie, Mommy?" Joey asked, reminding us that he was there.
"Oh yeah, it's really great. You're right about that."
I took some time cleaning myself up, loving the way that Jasper kept his eyes fixed on my body the whole time. He wanted me, and my God, I wanted him too.
"Mom, do I have any more work to do?" Joey asked me. "Or can I go and play in my room some more? I won't make too much of a mess..."
"Yeah, sure." I waved him away quickly. "You go have fun, okay? I'm going to stay here to see if Jasper needs any help in the kitchen."
By the time Joey vanished, I'd damn near lost all control of myself. The passion was so much, so needy, that I barely waited for even a second before I pulled him into the pantry where we could have a moment alone.
I hooked my hand around the back of Jasper's neck and kissed him hard and fast. The passion between us absolutely exploded. His hands were all over me, just as much as mine were––we just couldn't get enough of each other.
The wetness pooling in my panties took complete control of my body. I barely had any power over my actions as I kissed down Jasper's body and fell to my knees. Hungrily, I unzipped his trousers, and pulled his thick cock free. I glanced upwards to see the heady desire in Jasper's eyes before finally wrapping my lips around him, taking him to the back of my throat.
I didn't pause for even a second for either of us to catch our breath. It felt like this was something I'd been dying to do ever since I first got to the safe house, and I locked eyes with this intense man. I circled my tongue around him as I dragged my lips up and down his shaft, tasting every damn inch of him, and he tasted sexy as all hell. He was musky and masculine, absolutely intoxicating. I gripped on to his ass to keep him in place while I continued to plunge him between my lips.
I couldn't stop myself from moaning and groaning with pleasure, which vibrated along his length, which seemed to make it so much better for him.
Jasper started trembling, stiffening, the pleasure was gripping hold of him. Animalistic wolf-like sounds emanated from him as he knotted his fingers up in my hair and guided me, just a little, so I could pick up the pace the way he preferred. I continued to lick him like a lollipop even as I moved faster until finally, he couldn't hold it back any longer.
He exploded between my lips, shooting his seed down my throat. Fuck, his sweet and salty seed that I adored. I swallowed it down eagerly, allowing just a little bit of it to dribble down my chin, just like the ice cream was only moments before.
"Fucking hell, Billie!" Jasper growled as he reached out to take my hands and pull me to my feet. "You are something else, do you know that?"
"Yeah?" I giggled as I rested my head against his chest. His heart was racing like crazy, all because of me. I loved having that effect on this man.
"Oh hell yeah. You really are."
We remained in that position for a few moments, just holding each other as we calmed down, and I had to admit I liked being like this with him, just holding on to him, having him as mine.
I might be digging myself deeper into this hole, but there was no way I could climb out of it now. I was already in, the damage was done, so I guess all I could really do was enjoy this moment until it was possibly taken away from me. Who the hell knew what was going to happen next?
But unfortunately, we couldn't remain in the pantry forever. We had to sneak out and try to not get caught. Just for now at the very least. But the little taboo nature of the whole thing only added to the excitement.
My God, I really had become a wild sex kitty, hadn't I? This was an unexpected side effect to running away from New York and hiding from the Russians...